Open Your Eyes

I wrote this 9/1/07

It feels like everytime I close my eyes
I see you
I feel you
every move you make I see it, I feel it
Why do you tease me so
I've wanted you so long
Unable I am to let go

First time I thought of you
I was just a child myself
I thought of you again as a teen
and then all grown up
Even now you never leave my thoughts
I want you so badly
and I feel so bad for my selfishness

I open my eyes
but you're not here
you never were
How can I tell my boys I miss you
if you never existed
Why would I dream of you home with me
if it wasn't meant to be?

Why, my baby girl, why?