Liars

What happened to that day

back when I was young

When I was told I could grow up to be

anything that I wanted to be

“Just set your sights young man”, they said

“Follow your heart,

give it your all,

reach for the stars and bask in the glow”

 

Well here I am, grown up (in years),

facing another locked door

A crumbled application

stuffed in my back pocket

and where are they now,

dead and gone, not around

to tell me what went wrong

 

All I wanted to be was yours

 

Liars

 

Reviews

[icelandicblue]

We can't just be something because we want it. The hard reality is life is filled with compromises and disappointments but...sometimes where it leads you was worth the journey no matter how bumpy.

[willweb]

You are correct...Thanks so much Icelandicblue for reading and commenting on my poem.

[TL Boehm]

Oh. this one stings. I waffle with that whole "tell your kids they can be anything" mindset. I don't believe it. it is a lie. it only leads to torment.

[willweb]

Tammy, thank you for reading and commenting. I am with you, I do believe we should be encouraging, but make it real.

[Josie E. Cook M. A.]

Captured my thoughts during the day as I reflect on not meeting my expectations and asking why?
Pondering what others would say or think about this situation that I call my life...
Always remembering setting goals and wanting to grow up to meet them...
Would it be or not ?
Who said it would....?
I don't remember, but it was mentioned in the past as I was growing up.

[willweb]

Josie, if one of your goals was to be an amazing poet, you have accomplished that goal. Thank you so very much for visiting my world again and enjoying my work.

[Josie E. Cook M. A.]

I have to do this in my classes all the time and I practice close reading for class. This makes me happy that I am doing it well. Thank you!

[AprilRN1210]

I like how you captured the internal struggles, with the relating it with advice given when younger that shapes us and our beliefs when older (in years).. I like how it still has a layer and feel of innocence, but with a deeper wisdom that comes with experience... it has a perfect mix of imagery and emotion.. it has an intimate feel as if we are there... you can hear the thoughts as running through head, see the reaction, feel the struggle... and the ending of course tugs on the heartstrings, you went for the kill and I would say success.. well done!..

[willweb]

April, your review has blown me away today, I am speechless. Thank you for your kindness always to me. I really don't know what to say but thank you!!

[AprilRN1210]

you are welcome, my friend.. it is always a pleasure.

[CARA AL-DUNYAZAD]

Hi there, Wilweb
Nice story theme but I didn't get the poetry lines also the format doesn't allow the reader to see it as a poem... I feel that poems really need a different format for the reader's sake...a more central worded document. Look at it again...Personally it would make a great movie as we have all had those comments said to us in our lives from many well-wishers however your title 'liars'...is not necessarily true because we cannot change what others see in us as people. if that is a potential in us or not.Just because we cannot see the same doesn't label them liars...Think about it...how many times have you said to someone you hardly know especially a younger person who looks miserable ...that they could amount to anything they chose to do...once they put their mind...or heart into. Depression can make one perceive negative thoughts where none were meant and alcoholic can change one's whole life path if one were to give into its temptation....setbacks make the weak sit back and relax while the strong straddle on regardless what is said to them.

[willweb]

Thank you so much Cara. Sorry you didn't like the format, it is just how I write. Your words however on the subjest are very true. This was just a thought, not something I feel inside. Though, I can never remember this being said to me, I am sure it was at some point or other in my life. As far as me saying it to someone else...guilty as charged. I believe in encouraging people, trying to get them to see their full potential. I am a prime example of hard work and wide open dreams bringing a to life more than was ever expected.

[CARA AL-DUNYAZAD]

Well said! And you must always write in your true style whatever anyone else says or wants...you are in control that is the fun of being a creative writer and poet...and like a movie I think one can always view it again and still find hidden meanings that escaped one's eye the first time around...at the moment I am sitting up at 3AM writing poems that are coming in fast and furious :o))) ...I would like your critique eye on both the poems I wrote...okay I grant you they are rather long winded and if you're pushed for time I might not get your comments this month! So far family and friends think its my forte but I would value your opinion however critical that might be its better than nothing wouldn't you agree? Oh yes I would like to see more of your work here on Writer's café or on a bookshelf, so when I buy it I will know that a Wilweb wrote it!

[MsJewel]

Oh yes...we are told one thing and then reality sets in and well...your poem pretty much sums it up...anger, frustration...
Powerful writing my friend.

:) Julie

[willweb]

thank you so very much Julie for this nice reveiw of my work. I am thrilled you enjoyed this

[Einstein Noodle]

eeeeyow! this is the line that really throws me!:
"All I wanted to be was yours"
will web!!!!!!!!! where the hell did that come from?
the rest of this poem indicts me as a dad .. (i know that is not your intent) .. but it is the way my daddy raised me and me my own .. success is such a combination of complexities .. who can figure .. if one doesn't love money and or power enough .. but works honestly and persistently ...then .. its the boat that floats the middle .. and mostly avoids the snags and sand bars .. i am probably way off .. but i like this one ... it rocks my boat ;)
E.

[willweb]

I hope you don't get seasick E. Thanks my friend, it is that and so much more. The truth is, no one ever told me this, I just figured it out on my own. :)

[cynthiabuhainbaello]

A sweeping label indeed for all who spoke of a "nice future" from the past but are now gone, not here to witness their words never materialized. When dreams fail (and they do many times) it is not fair to point blame on others but the failure itself helps us to learn how to do better and what changes need to be made in us. Choices are always OUR call, nobody makes it for us and nobody can tell us what went wrong - we have to find that out by ourselves. The poem breathes hopelessness and despair, and the last word "Liars" closes it with an unresolved conclusion. Anyway, it's just a poem, and that's quite a relief.

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Cynthia. Yes, it is just a poem, just a random thought that crossed my mind. I am happy though that you enjoyed this today.

[Rene Salinas]

How moving. The moment were something crumbles and we look back in anger and wonder at all the stuff we were told. Oh don't worry there is plenty more to come. In fact I think in therein lies the problem, the application in your back pocket although refused today might be the one that gets approved tomorrrow but I think it is the expectation what creates the dissapointment. Equanimity is a hard thing achieve.

Not to mention the moment when Santa becomes a human being.....


Thankyou

[willweb]

Oh no, you mean Santa is not...no, I'm not going there, not today. :) Thank you so much my friend.