Sorrow drowns on dry land

Inspired by a review Kayleigh left on one of my poems

 

 

Standing at a distance,

staring at outlines

on a rock face outcropping

Buried deep beneath

an ancient rose garden

 

Rusted iron bars

chained and bolted,

left for dead as brittle petals

find a funnel cloud forming

and dance in a whirlwind mosaic

 

Disguised bold lettering

of forgotten fonts,

curl and peel as bark

from a crying birch tree

waiting for spring so it can start anew

 

Sunlight smears blue sky dreams

in finger paint colors

designing the moment

in portraits of a heart - this heart

basking in your glow

 

And as your smile approaches

the earth rejoices, pine tree party hats

hibiscus streamers wave

as a happy ending reigns

at the end of this poem - with the deceptive title

 

Reviews

[Diana]

I did not expect a happy ending with this poem at all. I'm okay with the deception in this case.

"Rusted iron bars
chained and bolted,
left for dead as brittle petals
find a funnel cloud forming
and dance in a whirlwind mosaic"- elegiac lyricism at its zenith... Pure gold, right there.

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Diana. I guess it says a happy ending can show up in the most unlikely of places.

[Pryde Foltz]

Rusted iron bars
chained and bolted,
left for dead as brittle petals
find a funnel cloud forming
and dance in a whirlwind mosaic

Wow … that is superlative metaphor and image work, WW.

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Pryde for this nice review. I am happy you liked this one.

[Corset]

The Birch tree is known by several folk-names: Beithe, Bereza, Berke, Beth and Bouleau. Its associated deity is Thor. Its gender type is Feminine, its planet ruler is Venus, and its associated element is Water. Birch is used to attract the powers needed for protection, purification and exorcism and so as I read this poem I feel the beauty of this write, experience the clarity of the visual call for happiness and release into the happy ending we all so wish to experience as in fairytales, we weave into our lives what we most desire, so I always say be careful what you wish for. lol. gorgeous write.

[willweb]

Thanks so much Corset and thanks for that information. I really had no idea, I may need to plant a birch tree now. I wrote this based on a dicussion about deceptive titles in poetry. I am excited you enjoyed this and yes, be careful what you wish for.

[Ally Monique]

Your poetry is phenomenal! You have a very creative mind, I'm quite jealous! This is top notch, well penned :)
I'm happy to have stumbled on your poetry!

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Ally. Nothing to be jealous of, your poetry is wonderful to me as well. I am happy I found your page.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

a garden comes alive, a heart comes alive...nice to have some happy endings...we don't get enough of them.

nicely written piece.
jacob

[willweb]

Thanks Jacob. Yes sir, not enough happy endings, at least not in the book I've been wri-reading. :) Thanks again.

[Ruth]

I can see I am going to love your writing :) So descriptively bold and emotive x

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Poppy for those nice words. I am happy you liked this one today.

[Sweet Brevity]

Favorite read of the day;) amazing job;)

[willweb]

Thank you so very much Sweet Brevity for those nice words today. I am excited you enjoyed this.

[michele vera]

I love this............I too am Waiting for My Lovely Angelic Man to Arrive..........I love him Beyond Words...
He is my Jesus Christ Superstar....I Bless the Kingdom of God for his existence in this Earth....
He Blesses All, he is an angel of god.......I am his sweetFlowing Star of Allegiance,Respect and Highest
Divine Honour...........................................................................................................

[willweb]

Thank you so much Michelle for your nice review. I am happy you enjoyed this today.

[Kayleigh]

Willweb, I am touched. This was written so well again with your deceptive title; I think when you have been deceived it makes the poem so much more powerful as you didn't expect it, especially the ending. This is fantastic and your title definitely deceive me. Like I said, I liked it.

Well done Willweb. This will go into my favourites.

[willweb]

Thanks so much Kayleigh. I guess we never know when inspiration will find us. Thanks for the thought and the idea and the nice review. This was fun to write. I am really happy you liked this.