Draining

Draining, slowly draining

from each pore

flows what this should have been

filling buckets with pain

silent ripples in galvanized containers

spilling, quickly spilling

staining sidewalks

on dead end streets

where children play

and people laugh out loud

calling, endless calling

to empty skies

with blank stares

and dark clouds

evaporating the future that is now

draining, slowly draining

 

 

 

Reviews

[Saddam]

empty skies
with blank stares
and dark clouds
evaporating the future that is now
draining, slowly draining.

A very expressive poetry dear. I like it very much.

[willweb]

Thank you SSADD for your comments. I am glad you enjoyed this.

[MsJewel]

I read this a few times....I took away from it the emotional exhaustion one must feel falling into a deep depression. A moving write that truly is haunting. Great writing here.

:) Julie

[willweb]

Thank you Julie for reading and commenting on my poem. I am glad you liked it.

[Bright Ocean Star]

KLG used all the really good adjectives, so I will attempt to be original here. I like this piece. It speaks of a person's personal fatigue, bone deep, spirit deep, soul depleting fatigue that wipes you out....I think everyone can identify with this. Life can be emotionally, physically exhausting. Excellent write...and look everyone! No rhymes! :)

[willweb]

You speak an absolute truth. Thank you for your comments and yes, no rhymes.

[Lyn Anderson]

I really like this. It is cryptic, yet descriptive. It is deep, yet simple. A perceptive commentary on fragile humanity.

[willweb]

Thank you KLGoode. You understand. Thank you for reading and commenting.

[Baby Ricochet]

Cool images and metaphors. Great work.

[willweb]

Thank you Baby Ricochet for reading and commenting on my poem.

[wordman]

I guess grief is a part of life and you penned it well lots of imagery and emotion

[willweb]

Thank you Wordman for commenting on my poem

[A. Amos]

Noodelhead directed me here and first thank to her and for your poem my friend, simply Epic!

[willweb]

Thank you A. Amos. Glad you liked this.

[A. Amos]

You're most welcome

[Mary]

Poignant expression of deep sorrow. I could relate to this on many levels. Well done, well done.

[willweb]

Thank you Mary. I am glad you enjoyed this.

[Ranger Kessel]

hey, glad i stopped for a read. keep at it.:)

[willweb]

Thank you for reading and commenting. Glad you enjoyed this.

[s y e]

I love how your first line and last lines are the same. Grief is a strong emotion and can completely change a person. You really hit the jackpot with this one.

[willweb]

Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem Noodlehead.