II[1]. Obergefreiter Werner Brckner, 9 Infanterie-Division

I.  Ernst Kauptmann

 

I was always the weak one

smaller than all my friends

so, when we would gather to play games

and pick sides, I was last chosen

Yitzak, whom was the strongest in our neighborhood

when he was team captain, he picked me first!

me!  I could not kick that hard or run that fast

but pick me he did

after the game, whether we had won or lost

this boy would share some candy with me

 

I think that he was fourteen

two years older than I

tall and blonde and blue-eyed

he had strong muscles

and good endurance

Yitzak never said much, I can only remember

him saying my name when he picked me for his team

 

My father was a doctor

one of the smartest men I shall ever know

he was educated at a medical school in London

I was a smaller replica of my father

thin, wiry, wavy brown hair

he was always handing me books

saying ‘Ernst, you should read this, it will expand your mind’

he was also brutal in his enforcement of my studies

and many days I did not go out at all

but was forced into schoolwork or reading

while the other children played

sometimes (because my room was on the ground floor)

on those days, Yitzak would come by my house

and would place some of his candy on the windowsill of my room

still, still, he did not say a word

but rather, smiled and winked at me

 

One day in late 1935

it was a bright fall day

and the leaves were just starting to change

my father came into my room where I was reading

he said to me, ‘Ernst, I have seen you playing with that Jewish boy

you must never play with him again.

Do you understand me?’

And I  replied to him

(because my father encouraged discussion with him)

‘But father, Yitzak always picks me to play on his team!’

that is when I saw that my father had a switch behind him

I could see that it was of birch or beech

green and supple

he suddenly brandished this switch

and began to beat me with it

all about my person

with each strike, each welt that he left upon me

he screamed, ‘JEWS! ARE! FILTHY!’

when he was done, my father who had never beat me before

told me I could not go outside for a week,

and that I was to come straight home from school

the next night, I was in my room studying again

my father came in, again with the switch

he began to beat me, I did not protest this time

saying with each mark that by now had begun to bleed,

‘JEWS! ARE! DISEASED! VERMIN!’

‘THEY! ARE! UNCLEAN!’

afterwards he would leave my room

and even beaten, I was expected to return to my work

by the forth day of this, I resigned that my father would beat me forever

 

Later that week

I think it was on Saturday, 5 days into my beatings

Yitzak came to my window

He could not just leave the candy there

like he always did

because I had shut it

so he tapped on the glass to get my attention

smiling, and holding out some sweets to get my attention

I opened the window

‘Go away Yitzak, I can’t play with you anymore, you are a filthy Jew’

and shut it again quickly so that he could not reply

he stood there for a moment

frowning now, still holding out the candy

and then he went away

 

In 1938 I joined the Hitler Youth

we would walk around the streets

looking for the slightest provocation

to beat someone

the was little else to do

no one played games anymore

One day, I think it was in April or maybe May

A boy walking ahead of us

called out, “JEW! There’s a JEW!’

and we all ran after this Jew

I was not as fast as them, still being thin and bookish

when I came upon them

two streets down

they were beating and kicking this Jew

screaming, ‘KIKE! KIKE!’

then they stopped

and I pushed my way to the front

laying on the ground

with ripped clothes, scrapes, and bruises

laying on the ground was this same

boy whom I always used to play

 

he looked up at me

recognized me, even though I was dressed in

Hitler Youth browns

and do you know what he did?

he opened his hand

that had been near his face to protect it

in his hand

was candy

then Yitzak smiled

 

I began to kick him

as hard as I could

this time he did not block his face

the other boys cheered me on

I kicked him as hard as I could

as long as I could

until he could no longer smile

when I had finished

and us boys walked away

they clapping me on the back

congratulating me for ‘Teaching that Jew’

I looked over my shoulder

 

Yitzak had managed to sit up

he met my eyes for a moment

then with his crushed hands

he sat the candy down upon the ground

 

This is how it started for me.

II.  Obergefreiter Werner Brückner, 9. Infanterie-Division

 

(Can you please give me your name and what your rank was during the war)

 

My name is Werner Brückner

I served in the 9^th Infantry Division as an

Obergefreiter �"that is your corporal

I was on the Eastern Front

being drafted just before

the attack on Russia

in 1941

 

(What is it that you wanted to say?

Why have you come today?

You do realize that this is a Holocaust inquiry?)

 

Yes, yes

I know what this is!

Coming here today took great courage

I wanted you to know, this, this

inquiry

to know

that not all Germans

did these things

we did not all shoot the Jews, gas the Jews

whatever

 

(…)

 

no, -no do not

interrupt me again, please

let me say what I need to

what the people who see this

should know

 

In April of 1942

We were moving swiftly across

Southern Russia

My division was following

the Panzers

as we made for the Dnieper River

 

Often, for some reason

my squad would be chosen

along with some others

to guard villages

along the way

until the SS

would come and relieve us

 

We came to one such village

in June

and again,

my Platoon

it was picked to guard this place

 

we could see that it was full of

Jews

all of us avoided them

as much as possible

we believed them unclean!

but we remained there

I think at this point we had

9 men

the afternoons were

hot and dusty and dry

all of us did not want to be here

we wanted to be in the fight!

 

this boy

I remember him well

would come out in front of us

in the late afternoons

when the sun was shining its brightest

it was very hot those days

he was thin, very thin

with black wavy hair

and a long nose, too long for his face

this boy, he would dance for us

and do acrobatic tricks

like he was in the circus

flips and twirls

some over his back!

Well, at first

the men were apprehensive

thinking it might be a partisan trick

to get us to let down our guard

but we would watch this boy dance

and would applaud

 

 

 

no partisans came

so eventually

I do not remember who started it

someone threw the boy some bread

after he had finished

then one day

it was a week later

someone threw him a bar of chocolate

and so it was

each hot and sunny day

the boy would dance

and we would throw him bits

bread, chocolate, sweets

and we would applaud

for 20 days it went on like this

 

Then one early morning

a motorcycle pulled up

told us he was with the SS

and that we should go

then he drove back to the plume of dust

that was moving our way

but we didn’t know where our Division was

so we waited to use their radios or maps

 

then they came

in their trucks, jeeps, a tank

smart black uniforms

high boots

silver medals

even in all that dust

even in that dust

their uniforms stayed black

we asked them if they knew of our unit

they did not

but would find out

 

then they began

to round up all of the villagers

I think there were 30 of them

we stood away

while

they burned their homes

murdered the few animals that were there

and beat the people about the heads

with their rifles

their Leutnant

he made them all stand in a line

along a ditch

for 3 hours

 

we thought they were going to march them

somewhere

then suddenly

he walked up and shot the first one in the head!

 

down the line this man walked

shooting each villager in the head

we were horrified!

even if they were Jews

they were civilians

 

they did not deserve to die

even if they were Jews

the Leutnant had almost reached

this small boy

we began to be upset

and whispered between each other

 

then, just as the man put

his gun

to this boy’s head

I yelled, ‘Herr Leutnant, do not kill this boy’

he smirked at me, ‘why should I not kill this Jew?’

I tried to think of an answer

a clever answer

but all I could think of was

‘he dances for us’

the SS Leutnant laughed and said to his men around him

‘the boy dances for these men!’

and the others laughed as well

then he turned his back to me

smiling and stepped on to the next person

and shot them all except the boy

after this, they left

we waited around all afternoon

but the boy still stood where he had

next to his parents

unmoving

he did not dance

he did not dance for us

 

so we packed our things

and left some bread and sweets

at his feet

and left

 

you see! you see!

we are not all the monsters that you think we are!

we are not all just murderers!

my squad saved this boy!
we saved him!

--william paris