Be My Savior

Be my savior

Help me find myself

Be sure I don't fall fast

Be there when I need you

All I am really asking of you

Is to be one I can always talk to

And be my downfall when necessary

I swear I'll always be there for you

I'm begging be the same for me

I know I'll stand by your side

If you willl stay at mine

So don't leave please

Promise you'll stay

Author's Note

Spur of the moment when I heard the line "Be my savior" in this awesome song called "Downfall" by Matchbox 20. Anyway, hope y'all liked it.
-Willa

Reviews

[Wpww!!!]

Hey i really like this you should enter in my contest you may when. I wish my mom would stay by my side and always be there but she chose to leave me and my brother and i miss her alot but i have a step mom and i still have trouble talking to my step mom.this also reminds of onne of my favirote songs called"saviour" by "black veil brides" my favirote band besides marilyn mason.

[Savior of Time]

Thanks Prophet. I'm sorry about your mom. I love BVB, but somehow I haven't heard that one. I'll think about the contest. Thanks again!

-Willa

[Phillitup]

Look up from the ground you're staring at, I'm right here. LOL, that sounds creepy. You know I'm always gonna be here for you, right? Please let me know if you don't. I'll make you realze...:)

[Savior of Time]

Yes, yes it does.. Yeah, I know.. I was sort of thinking of C when I wrote it, I think. I don't know. It was weird. I don't know how I feel about him.. I'm so confused... Anyway, thanks.

-Willa

[Phillitup]

Yeah...

[Phillitup]

please read my new poem

[Savior of Time]

Okay.

-Willa

[Phillitup]

thanks

[Riley Bray]

I liked the poem, though it got a little floundery at the end. (Yes, I realize I just made that word up, but at least I didn't say its "waffling" like my teacher would). Anyway, I have to say, when I saw the format I had thought you were doing an acrostic, and was disappointed when I realize it wasn't. I really think that if you're going to write something so short that's not a haiku or senryu, it should be acrostic. I also think it would add to this specific poem. (Although that would require this whole thing to be reconstructed so just keep it in mind for works in the future). Anyhow good job.

[Savior of Time]

Umm, okay... I don't get what most of that means... Sorry...

[Riley Bray]

What don't you understand? Is it that you just don't know what an acrostic is? (Because I didn't know what that was until I joined this site on the 13th either).

[Savior of Time]

Yeah, I don't get what that means.. Sorry I'm stupid

[Riley Bray]

Haha that's okay, its all a matter of perspective, yes? Age makes you wiser, (though I shouldn't be one to talk since I'm not that much older than you). Anyhow, live and learn right? I'm not that amazing at perfect definitions, so I'll use the webster online dictionary. Ahem, "A poem, word puzzle, or other composition in which certain letters in each line form a word or words." Look at my poem, "I Hope You CHOKE." Its an acrostic so maybe you'll understand. Just in case you don't know, a haiku and senryu poem are works where there are three lines, the first and last line containing five syllables and the center line containing seven. The difference between the two is that a haiku is specific to nature, while a senryu can be all else. (For reference read my poems, "Her Story (In Haiku's)" which is a haiku catalogue basically, and "Senryu Of The Damned." which is a senryu.)

[Riley Bray]

Does this make more sense now? :)

[Savior of Time]

Umm, I guess.. I still feel like I did it all wrong..

[Riley Bray]

Nah, there is no right or wrong in the writing world, its all about styles, really, and the choices we make as artists. I simply suggested a few ideas to help you improve, as if everyone always says things like, "that was great!" and leave it at that, how will one grow? I simply chose to be the one to praise you and also help show you another point of view. You may very well hate the things I suggested and utterly refuse to do any of it, but the option and opportunity never would have presented itself had I not taken it upon myself to show it to you from a different perspective. Its called playing "the devils advocate" where you take your point of view but also have to understand the other. Our styles just contradict is all. Still a good job. :P

[Savior of Time]

I guess..

[Riley Bray]

Oy yes.

[Andrew (MJ) Nugteren]

This was a good piece, Willa.
I really liked this one.
and I'm here when needed :)

[Savior of Time]

thank you :)

[Andrew (MJ) Nugteren]

your very welcome =]

[CreativeStroke]

"And be my downfall when nessissary" it is spelled, necessary.

This was a good piece, Willa. We all long for that someone we can share everything with, complete trust and always have our backs. You penned this nicely :)

[Savior of Time]

I'm a bad speller! I don't caaaare -.- okay, fine, i do care. thanks.

[CreativeStroke]

You're welcome! I tend to spell stuff wrong at times too, but I like when people point it out, because I want it to be correct.