Indecision

Knotted innards are not something I can easily describe to you.

Physiologically, they are perfectly shaped
but metaphorically, they are
twisted
matted
pulsing
with a pain I am unable to describe to you without grabbing your wrist
and taking your life.

Throbbing temples are not simply a headache

A tidal wave of emotion and question are smashing at my cranium
day and night
ebbing and flowing,
begging to be released in a display of primitive anger,
I do not comply.

Tightened muscles are not always a voluntary action.

Unchecked passion flows through my sinew unmolested
contorting my hands into pretzels
jerking my legs to and fro
making me flex ligaments I didn't even know I had.

My mind is something I cannot comprehend.

A field of synapses and sensations
no syntax could appropriately detail,
What do I do when thinking is not enough?

My heart is a beast of its own.

Pumping the very matter which gives me life
while clamoring for my own death,
my heart begs for me to make up my mind,
while my mind wishes I had a bit more heart.

Indecision is not a gentle lover.

She will rip you apart
and dare you to put yourself back together
knowing damn well that you can't.

Inaction is not the solution.

You must stand up and take charge
make a decision
and pray to whomever will listen that you made the right one.

Reviews

[Careline]

And props to you for at least being man enough to take charge and make a decision. In my case, I had to do what he was not man enough to accomplish. Wasted time and wasted tears..

[Careline]

She will rip you apart
and dare you to put yourself back together
knowing damn well you can't.

You're wrong, you can.

[luvs2write]

I love this!! I mean the poem, not the feeling. I don't think anyone likes those feelings. I know what you're talking about though, this was really relatable. I have anxiety, so decisions are my nemesis. And never knowing if you chose the right one? Makes me want to crawl back under my covers and never come out. The poem describes the feeling with new ways and new images, I really like it. I think I might have seen a typo though, in line two. You said "tney" but I'm guessing you meant "they"? Really great poetry, keep it up!!

[Will]

It always makes me happy to know that people can relate to what I'm writing and connect to it and perhaps make sense of their own problems. Thanks so much for the great review and for reading, and yes that is supposed to be "they". I'll go fix it now, thanks again :D

[luvs2write]

You're welcome. =) I really enjoyed reading it....

[Leslie Philibert]

A strong poem, in a lot of ways, from both the choice of subject, to the use of language.Impressive.

[Will]

Thank you Leslie. I was shooting for a show of vocabulary here so I'm glad you appreciated it

[Jamestown]

Decisions have never been something I struggle with, it's the aftermath of them
that kicks my butt, lol! Last stanza says it well for me, great piece of work, thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[Will]

Cleaning up the mess is a whole nother branch of poetry. Thanks for reading :)