When All Hope Dies

Screams of a thousand bloody souls
all rummage through my head.
They pierce the silence and taint the night
as I lie here in my bed.

The damned and needy cry for help
blinded by agony.
They seek out help from the strong and bold,
but get stuck with just oi' me.

Poor unfortunate souls,
In pain, and in need.
Now chanting the dirty words
of their demonic creed.

Their pain, remorse and sorrow
are louder than screams could be.
One day, God willing, it will be
that the damned can be free.

Free of my mind and of my ears
I won't have to hear their cries.
The days they come and shout me down
are the days when all hope dies.

Reviews

[SteveB]

A strongly penned piece of the dark days that still retains both hope and self awareness. I like the rhyme and metrical flow but at the risk of seeming anal, the third line of stanza four. The end of the lone with "be" when the rhyme scheme has "be" and "free" is a slight bit jarring. When something as minor as that is pointed out as a fault you know you did a very solid job.

[Baby Ricochet]

In the Book "Mans Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl he says that no matter what happens in life there's always hope. The man did time in a Nazi concentration camp, he'd know.

[Rita L. Sev]

A morose write, well expressed, Will. The rhyme is flawless, and the reader is left pondering those hopeless moments... Well penned.

[Will]

Thanks, Rita! I'm glad you liked it, and found the value behind the depression. Thanks again :)

[s y e]

This is so sad Will! A lovely write, I loved the way you wrote it.

[Will]

Thanks, Sye! I put a lot into this one, so I'm glad you liked it

[Talal Hussain]

Ah such a wonderful and thoughtful write...great job :-)

[Will]

Thank you much :)

[Leslie Philibert]

Like the poem, think it is a sad that such a young person writes such a poem full of pain and remorse...
I bet there are things you see every day that are positive !

[Will]

I see plenty of positives, bu the reason I do is because I keep my vision unclouded by the sadness because I write it down. Thanks, Leslie.