The Alleyway prologue

The Alleyway prologue

A Chapter by Jakl and Hyde
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This is chapter one of Alleyway. For a better description look at the original post.

"
I sit in the dark waiting for my next victim. As someone walks by I knock them out. Depriving them of oxygen. When they are down that is when I do my dirty work. I pul out my tools. I dismember the male. I also disembowel him. Leaving blood in the alley.  I spread the body parts all over town. Leaving them n dumpsters or on the sidewalk. I left a lot of blood, but there is no need to clean it up. They'll never know who did it, because like you I work, eat, sleep, and so on. I hide in plain sight among all of you. You never know where I am or who I am, and you never will. You don't even know if you will be my next victim. I would keep an eye open if I were you.


© 2017 Jakl and Hyde


Author's Note

Jakl and Hyde
This is just a prologue but tell me things to improve on or to add to the main story. I will continue to write chapter one in my free time. Please give me some feedback.

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Reviews

I feel I some how inspired this my dear friend. Oh the chaos.
I like the tale but when you mention "I dismember the male. I also disembowel him." Try and make this into one sentence. I would also refer to the victim as man instead of male it flow better in my opinion. I also feel as if the last line is not needed. I always feel that addressing the reader directly is awkward. Just by leaving it at " You don't even know if you will be my next victim." creates an eerie atmosphere and feels more defined as an ending statement.
Friend I enjoyed it and I am looking forward to where you take this. I am excited. Thank you for the dark tale.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on September 27, 2017
Last Updated on September 27, 2017


Author

Jakl and Hyde
Jakl and Hyde

Hamilton, OH



About
I love to write and draw. I also like to play video games. I love racing as well. I write about things that I like and sometimes about things that pop into my mind. You don't have to like me. All I as.. more..

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A Story by Jakl and Hyde