Neurotic Terms

There's so many words I must say,

Each & every syllable much too long for an end,

Is this what eternity seems like?

I can't stand up & tell it to you straight,

You'll never get my point, 

I don't know if you'll see my view,

Or even try to put yourself in my shoes,

There's a fear inside of me,

A fear of facing the truth,

The truth about everything,

Anything,

& everyone,

..Lying seems more of an easier path to take,

How do I stand,

& handle fear in the face?

How do I try not to lose my sanity?

I know I'll crack under pressure,

& I'll start to notice my breath fade out,

My hands will start to shake,

& my vision will blur,

I'll be trapped,

& there will be no way out,

I'm trying to let this all go,

But letting go means goodbyes,

& growing up,

I don't like goodbyes,

& I wish I could stay a kid,

These words will set a part of me free,

But what good is it,

When there will still be a whole lot of myself,

Still in despair?

What good will it be,

 When silence still overruns my life?

I have to face my fears,

But I don't want to,

This is much too hard for me to do,

How will I be able to handle the consequences? 

Will there be any consequences?

I don't know what,

Or where I'll go to,

Is there even a safe haven?

I'll spend all my vanity on this insanity.

Author's Note

Writer's block. Sorry.

Reviews

[Simon Welsh]

There's a true paranoia. I too love that concluding line.

[Luna Zerimar]

I'm late, but thanks Elliott. (: I made that line out of nowhere. I thought it was pretty neat, too.

[Chloe_Spence]

Loved the concluding line "I'll spend all my vanity on this insanity"

[Luna Zerimar]

Thank you.