I Don't Mind

If you want to come back to my place, you can if you want?

It's really messy and my roommate is a b***h but

I'm sure we would have a great time.

I have some whiskey in the cupboard if you want a glass?

I'm not a big drinker but I can be for tonight.

Please ignore my underwear on the floor,

I forgot to put them in the laundry.

Before you kiss me,

I haven't done this much so please

don't look at my belly button.

Don't laugh! I had it pierced

but I took it out and now there is an ugly scar.

You don't have to rush off but

I'm sure you're a busy guy.

Don't feel you have to leave or anything,

you can stay,

I don't mind..

Author's Note

For all of the sweethearts who are abit shy and self-conscious! Please give me your thoughts about it, criticism is welcome of course.

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

as long as you can take me as i am and not judge, yes, do please come back to my place---
you are more than welcome to teach me.

[Alex]

I loved this, thanks for your thoughts, I'm glad the poem stuck in your head!

[Rachel]

It's sort of relaxing and very relatable, I very much enjoyed it! :)

[Alex]

Thank you, I'm very glad you did! I like how you found it relatable as I did strive to make it as realistic as possible. It's awesome that you found it chill too, not so deep and dark which is good! Thanks again for your thoughts :)

[Laura Lynn]

It sounds like there's a lot everyone feels like this sometimes, not in the specifics but in general you know, we have to be grateful and thankful and not envy, you know, everyone can only have so much and do so much and figure out so much, you know

[Alex]

Yes, I totally agree! Thank you for your thoughts and for taking time to read and review- I really appreciate it!

[The Twin Arenas]

it's good. it's a little sad, too. i don't know. clingy. makes me feel like someone feels like someone else doesn't REALLY want them around. sometimes people believe that other people do want them around.

i guess you did say shy and self-conscious. throw another dot after mind at the end there.

it's good. third stanza the best one, I reckon.

[Alex]

Thank you for your thoughts on this piece, I'm glad you were able to understand it and feel the emotion behind the words. I will be sure to edit the dot in, thanks! Yes, I think the third stanza is the strongest also, it is quite realistic which I liked. Your review is much appreciated!

[Jesse Booker]

This is really good. It reminds me of the nervous yet excited feeling you get durning a new relationship when you first start to "explore" each other.

[Alex]

Yes exactly! You understood it bang on, I might have to change the title to 'the first exploration' now haha! Thanks for your thoughts.

[Jesse Booker]

You're quite welcome.

[Sadashivan Nair]

Nicely placed the views an compassion, forgiveness, you are natural good writer

[Alex]

Thank you very much!

[Lenah Mehzabin]

Very beautiful ! , touched me differently , Loved it ! :)

[Alex]

Thank you very much, I'm glad it effected you! Much appreciated :)

[Rene Salinas]

The first comment and you have made me go back in time a whole lifetime never mind a few years! It is definitely not your fault that the years haven't passed me, un - mercifully.

Then first thoughts and first or first impressions sort of thing, "I wish I would have met someone like this" back then.

The acceptance of the stage of life so to speak, the willingness to try, the openess and a little amount of nervousness even -- it came out cute. In a funny sort of way it also indicates a certain amount of security, you know you are you, sort of thing! (If that make sense) and you are not afraid to admit it!

On a horrribly tedious technical side a couple of subjective comments. I think it could be mostly agreed that each line of poetry is demarcated by the comma, it acts as a moment of "indentation" I think they call it, hence the need for a new line. If that is to be followed then the acceptance that every line would start anew, then the use of capitals are required.

Again just a couple of suggestions for you to consider.

I had forgotten about this feeling...

Thank You

[Alex]

Thank you for your thoughts and feelings on this piece, it was lovely to read! I'm glad that I was able to transport you back, that's a big achievement for me. Yes! You understand this piece perfectly, it is just like a stage of life, all the nervousness and shyness. Would you mind expanding on your comment about the punctuation please as I understand what you're saying but I'm not sure how I would go about this change! I really appreciate all your comments, thanks again!

[Justin]

that was really good :) :) u did a really great job with the presentation!!!! :)

[Alex]

Thank you very much! Thanks for spending time reading and reviewing this- it means a lot! Much appreciated :)

[Justin]

your welcome :) :) anything i can do to help a friend :)