Hades' Island

Hades' Island

A Story by Danny White
"

Under a brutal ruler, its people live through bloodshed and their children are exposed to firey evils. Follow along the story of a man, fighting his way in an island of Hell.

"

The icy wind whipped through the streets of town. All the sane were fast asleep inside there housing, but who is to say this was a place of sanity. Sounds of hoof against cobblestone and the creaks of axles echoed like clockwork through the roadways. Few dared stray from their path, for only few knew of the outside and only half the previously stated lived to tell about it. A hill set above the urban area but it was far from deserted. That was where the evil man kept his residence. He was a man of many words, but few looked up to the breath he used. This land was not ruled under what you may call a democracy or a republic. Described herein is not a country. It is a place of unfair ruling and of harsh law and citizen. There are some that would say this place never existed. Some say it was an island, others say it was a dream, but to others it was a lifetime in hell.

© 2013 Danny White


Author's Note

Danny White
This is the first paragraph of the prologue inside this maranating storyline. If you like this please leave your feedback, I would be very appreciative. Thanks, and may imagination never die.

My Review

Would you like to review this Story?
Login | Register




Featured Review

I would like to read more however there are a few things i personally would change. here are some

but who is to say this was a place of sanity.

Rather than leaving it open like that i would tell the reader bluntly

but this was not a place of sanity.

This seems like it may be a story with either a horror theme or scary parts. that being the case i would take out any mention of anything sane or nice and once again tell the reader bluntly of the terror horror and violence of this place. finally the end. I know this is only the first paragraph and i would need to read the rest of the prologue to know for sure but the way you end this would make an excellent ending. its the kind of thing i would put at the very end of a chapter or prologue. also try something like this

some say it was an island, others say it was a dream, but to all it was a lifetime in hell.
or
some say it was an island, others say it was a dream, but to most it was a lifetime in hell.

these are just suggestions in the end its your decision. Overall its intriguing and a good start just in need of a bit of fine tuning in my opinion.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I would like to read more however there are a few things i personally would change. here are some

but who is to say this was a place of sanity.

Rather than leaving it open like that i would tell the reader bluntly

but this was not a place of sanity.

This seems like it may be a story with either a horror theme or scary parts. that being the case i would take out any mention of anything sane or nice and once again tell the reader bluntly of the terror horror and violence of this place. finally the end. I know this is only the first paragraph and i would need to read the rest of the prologue to know for sure but the way you end this would make an excellent ending. its the kind of thing i would put at the very end of a chapter or prologue. also try something like this

some say it was an island, others say it was a dream, but to all it was a lifetime in hell.
or
some say it was an island, others say it was a dream, but to most it was a lifetime in hell.

these are just suggestions in the end its your decision. Overall its intriguing and a good start just in need of a bit of fine tuning in my opinion.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Good one

Posted 11 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

467 Views
2 Reviews
Rating
Added on December 20, 2012
Last Updated on March 2, 2013
Tags: alcatraz, fiction, prison, demons, Hell