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As he neared his 40th birthday, however, Mr. Behnen started to tire of the pace. Early one morning, after a night spent making the rounds of Cincinnati bars, he stopped to go to a 70-yr-old priest and good friend from his days as a monk. After listening to his grievance that he ''did not like assembly ladies this manner,'' Mr. Behnen says, the elder clergyman confirmed him a newspaper article about American Asian Worldwide Services. But the loneliness, Mrs. Elkington says, is a small worth to pay for a life in the United States, a conviction she appears to share with lots of the 1000's of different ladies who stare from mail-order catalogues. Mr. Patterson selected greater than 90 ladies from these in the catalogue and those who had written to him, and sent them a form letter telling about himself. He was, he wrote, born and raised in Tennessee, his job as a high quality-management technician at Planetic Engineering earned him about $28,000 a yr, he was sterile and he was looking for a spouse.