You Left.

I put myself in the place of a man who just lost the person he loves the most.

It's so hard to express my love,
Surrounded by these walls of despair,
For far too long I've been searching for the words of hope,
I've been tripping up and down these stairs,
Words can't fix a broken home like this,
Separation inevitable, it can't be replaced,
The love I feel is unrequited,
Your side of the bed is growing cold.

I'll see you weeks from now in the grocery store,
Avoiding eye contact with the sins you have crawled away from,
You left me alone,
You left me bitter,
You left me this empty house that I can't call a home.
How could you forget all the times that were special?
How could you forget the love we had?
5 years down the drain,
15 more, swallowed in pain.
How can I move on from the one I loved the dearest?
How can I live, without my breath to breathe?

Months from now, I'll call you up.
Only to hear the dismissive dial tone,
I'd f*****g die to hear your voice,
One last time.
Your cold shoulder is one I'd dream to cry on.
I'm weak,
I am powerless,
You took everything from me, and you expect me to survive,
Silence on the other end brings me no comfort, it leaves my mind in shambles,
It makes me believe,
That there was no love in your heart to begin with,
That these 7 years of happiness was all a f*****g ruse,
I can't help but lose.
What did you see in me anyway?
Are you f*****g evil or are you just bored of this place?

Answers, I need answers.
I want to know why,
I want to know how long this had been coming,
Is it my fault? Is it a matter of lost love? If you lost your love for me I swear to god I will find it.
You were everything to me but I guess I was nothing to you, why'd you waste all this time when it's been wasting in your head since the start?
If it was my fault I'll do everything to f*****g change,
I'll change everything about myself,
If it means that you'll like what you see on the other side of the bed in the morning.

I never laid a hand on you I merely destroyed myself I would never do anything to hurt you all that's been hurting is me.
Why did you leave?
Baby tell me why did you leave?
I'd do anything to get you back but I want you to be happy,
But it's not f*****g fair that you can still smile without any bullshit behind that grin,
I can't smile anymore, if I try hard enough, I can fake it, but what's the point of faking it when you can't feel anything at all?
I have no more words for you, my darling, my lungs are drowning in this regret you've dropped inside of me, my vocal chords are worn, the last thing I could every say to you the last thing that's on my mind, I'm sorry baby for whatever it was that I seemed to do, im sorry for whatever made you turn your back, for whatever made that call, for whatever caused you to leave in the middle of fall, the crisp leaves on the ground remind me of the times we had together, laying in the yard all alone, we only needed each other but now that's gone. All I feel in autumn is the cold bitter air, the grey skies are all that I see for miles all around. You took the sun you took the warmth, you took everything in my heart, you left me broken in this house and expected me to live alone, I am angry I am callous but I wish you no harm, I only wish for you to come back home and mend these broken steps with me and me alone.