Fake Problems and Real Problems

I’m tired of everyone thinking they’ve got a
Problem. F**k that s**t, you know? F**k the
Sober days, starting at zero, trying to make
Something respectable out of your mistakes
Because yeah, everyone knows you fucked
Up big time, man. They can see the dirt on
Your knees from tripping so many times and
All that heroin you sweat out still stinks when
Someone tries to give you a hug. Tastes like
An oil spill. Feels like electricity.
I’m tired of everyone trying to be sober. You
Had a drink, spit up stomach acid and now
You want to paint your flourishing habit like
Some van gogh floral reblog. God forbid you
Look up the meetings (i did). God forbid you
Panic whenever you think of stopping by the
Church to get saved (i did). God forbid you
Tell your ex you really did go to the meeting
Because he told you once he was sure you
Had a death wish and you didn’t want him to
Think you were crazy because guys don’t like
Crazy and that’s a scientific fact (but I am
Crazy, those kinds of stains don’t come out 
In the wash).
You know, I just wish everyone would save
Sobriety talks for the ones sweating out
Prescriptions, covered in cigarette holes and
Their own vomit. I want to see someone fly a
Kite in a lightning storm. Meet someone at
The meeting who tastes like thunder and
Recycled cups and stale coffee and dollar
Store donuts �" my god, you don’t know what
Any of that feels like, do you? Pretty princess
With doe eyes blurting out buried quotes
From an english class on romanticism held at
The local community college, the girl who can
Miraculously peel herself out of bed without
Remembering the taste of crushed pills
(love the numb, hate the dead sleep coma).
It’s just, like, congratulations. You sort of
Have a problem with collecting boxes of wine
But so does every other f*****g girl your age
And pretending to be sober is a lot like
F*****g a stranger
Because it means nothing but still satisfies
That aching, hurting part of you still
Searching
But I won’t be complicit in your little game,
Your lolita smile, coaxing laughter �"
You’re a damaged, dirty little sweet thing
And the scars on your wrist are a road map
But you don’t have a goddamn problem
With the bottle pressed against your lips
Anymore than you have a problem
With the boy pressed against your hips

Reviews

[Alessander]

Gripping.
At first I thought "oh, another confessional poem" but this is more than that. It's more Baudelaire than Plath.

There's a disgust and contempt that rivets through the piece, not just for self, but society and pretty much everything else, but there's still a searching for some sorta salvation, terrestrial, celestial, biological, whatever, anything will do.

I knew a few ppl who did heroine, and this seems to capture their "struggle" and general alienation, self-imposed or not, or as transpotting said, who needs happiness when you got heroine.

But still there's a lingering craving for some sorta liberation.

What separates this from the general confessional stuff is the unique phrasing and details.

Had a drink, spit up stomach acid and now
You want to paint your flourishing habit like
Some van gogh floral reblog

With doe eyes blurting out buried quotes
From an english class on romanticism held at
The local community college, the girl who can
Miraculously peel herself out of bed without
Remembering the taste of crushed pills

even the off-shod endings of lines help to create a tone of frantic urgency.

It ends somewhat nihilistic. Pills or love are both treated as tragic addictions.

And for some, they are.

[Wasteofpaint666]

You get it. Feed me pretty words any day darlin.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and i think the biggest disgust evident in this piece is when people pretend to be getting better when they really still crave all the stuff that got them to meetings in the first place...
it is that telling ourselves that we are no longer that person...when we really are and always will be...
this is a powerful "in your face" "tell it like it is " right...
i think Van Gogh might give his other ear for the honesty here.
j.

[emme33]

I love this! It's kind of like a well-written rant :) keep it up