Maybe One Day

Maybe one day

We can both stop running

And sit down beside each other

 

Maybe one day

We can say the three words

That’s as precious as life

 

Maybe one day

You can open your eyes

To see I’m still here

 

Maybe one day

These constant dreams

Will become reality

 

Maybe one day

You’ll realize

That I’m nothing without you

 

Maybe one day

You’ll feel the same

As I do about you

 

 

Not a man

But a heart of a lion

So fierce with passion

 

Not a child

But the pain of a wise man

Who experienced more than others

 

I am

What I dream

I can’t change

 

A victim

Of an incurable disease

Called love

 

I can dream

Of that one day

When you’ll stay in my life

 

Maybe one day

Everything will work out

So we can live in each other’s arms

 

Maybe one day

Reviews

[Mary]

good work, wistfully sad.

[Mandi Hidalgo]

I'm going through a difficult time right now due to a breakup. This explains a lot of what's going on. I love it!

[Wake Up!]

i love, love, love stanzas seven and eight. you have a great writing style and it is always pleasing. i also liked the parallel structure throughout. bravo (^_^)

[.shalynn.009.]

I loved this. One nitpicky thing:

"We can say the three words
That’s as precious as life" Since your talking about three words, this should be "That are as precious as life"

Other than that, I really liked this. The repetition of "Maybe one day" got across the longing of the speaker, and the continued formulas and structures for each stanza emphasized the speaker's continuous wait. I loved the description of love as an incurable disease. A very accurate description. I also like how you drifted away from the repetition of "Maybe one day" then brought it back to that mantra in the end, without resolving the dilemna. And in the part that moves away from that mantra, I like how you start out the two stanzas "Not a man" and "Not a child" respectively. It was a nice contrast, shows how the speaker is in limbo waiting for his love. Good poem. I very much enjoyed it's simplistic style and beautiful style.

[wirte4me]

I absolutely LOVED this piece. Great job. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.

~From~

Button :D

[A]

I must say this was absolutely terrific, I could relate to this poem that's why I enjoyed it so much... Don't we all wish that we'll have the " One Day " where our dreams would come true?
Very beautifully written

[Akshat♥]

that one day will come my friend...
this poem attracts you so much...
you want only one thing from life that is a pure love...
you always wanted a life that finishes on a good note..
you always need more and more...
but you see the people who even didn't have this much
that you do...
nice poem:)