She Must be me

This is a poem about how i feel...corny sounding i know

 

She must be me

Tattered dreams

A broken soul

A shattered heart

A big black hole

 

A room filled with people

It seems so dead

There’s a man in the window

It’s all in her head

 

She does not admit it

But she is scared

Not many know

The pain she has bared

 

She smiles in the morning

She cries in the night

It never did matter

How much she could fight

 

She hates her past

But she would never erase it

Just sometimes she wishes

She didn’t have to face it

 

She tells herself

Take it day by day

And she hopes that she can

When she folds her hands to pray

 

She wears a mask

At school and at home

It once was like steel

But now it’s like foam

 

People are noticing

That something is wrong

They can hear a missing note

In her once glorious song

 

This girl’s poor heart

Can’t take the pain

She feels like she

Is going insane

 

She knows she can make

This she is sure

But after every brick wall

There’s another locked door

 

This girl is who

I didn’t think I could be

But if I’m writing about her

Then she must be me…

 

Reviews

[Audrey Dertinger]

Voice thank you for the review You write so beautifully,your words just gently flow .You really are an inspiration I really enjoy reading your work .Thanks for sharing Audrey

[j-hizzle]

you're such an amazing writer.

[Ruminating Archaeologis..]

This one is cool how it's written. I enjoyed it, and how you expressed your self in it.

[Alexander]

This is really good; I can relate, in a sense. Thanks for sharing, I would think it would be hard; It is for me at any rate. This is gorgeously written, and it flows very nicely. This is my favorite -
"They can hear a missing note
In her once glorious song"
Very well done.
Z

[brittneymarie]

awesome write :]
The ending was great to
There was a lot of emotion running through this, that I really liked


Good job :]

[Jessica Fox]

what a wonderful poem, you do have a knack for expression yourself.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

wow i really like this...im sorry you feel this way though

[The Outlaws' Song]

Lovely! I agree with the others -- brilliant ending, wonderful flow, truly heart-felt.

[Lauren]

I loved this. I related to it the whole way through. I love how you twist it around at the last stanza ("But if I'm writing about her/Then she must be me...") Brilliant ending. And I agree with the others - not corny at all, but beautifully coming from your soul. Great work!

[Michelle Tarnowski]

Sometimes it is easier to write about our life from a distance, as if it is someone else. You've done that well. Good job!