Untitled

I am not dead
Yet,
My inferences doubt my existence.
Things seen, forgotten tomorrow;
Would my hands move,
Would i see,
Hate the meaningless reasons
Behind the curtains.
Brown days, boils in hand;
The sword of the dawn,
Lives in all of us.
Hard, gusted;
Rotten flesh in the rains to see tomorrow.
Yes, it is summer.

Reviews

[Pax Analog]

A well-rendered existentialist sensibility. The difference between a Euro existentialist sensibility and Zen, Taoist, or Advaita Vedantic, is that the latter forms of enquiry run deeper and don't assume Life needs reasons -- or that Life is determined by form only.

In other words, a contemplative disposition transcends the fretting of the mortal figure to intuit the a priori Ground. One is correct to suspect the veracity of a mere egoic lifespan, but it's nothing to worry about. There is a grace to allowing Consciousness to permeate you without getting in the way. It isn't even that difficult to directly observe that thoughts and feelings and phenomenology are arising in Consciousness.

We are wise to shift from the tormented logic of the figure to the seamless intuition of the Ground.

Your "sword of the dawn" reads like a scythe, but it is also Awareness Itself.

"I" is a Mystery, unbound.

[David Scott]

I wrote you a long review George... the site froze as I submitted it. grrr! :(

I like the write.
You show contrasting views and intelligence in your writing. You frame a thought well without filling in all the details fro the reader. Much is open to interpretation. I like the write.
I think each reader will come away with something very different depending on their cultural and geographic backgrounds.

[David Scott]

Summer means different things to people living in different climates. It is interesting how our vocabulary is framed by our weather patterns at times. Yet, we all see the power a change in the transformation of life in the seasons of the turning globe we call Earth.
So, here you show the reader how "summer" is in your experience. "Not dead yet", can be taken as a positive outlook. Like saying, "Thank goodness I still have life ahead of me." Also, it can mean, "I am just barely alive."
You actually do not tell the reader how you expect the read to be interpreted. I like this tool of poetry. You are building a frame and letting the reader fill in the picture. Like an ink blot test.
The line, "Hate the meaningless reasons behind the curtains", can be taken several ways as well. Does the author hate meaningless explanations hidden by those with power? Is the intention to describe hate as a collection of meaningless reasons again hidden behind power, bias, religion? Still, I could see this tying into the previous line about what you would choose to see in the world around you.
"The sword of dawn", carries much symbolism and will vary given your particular mythical references or spiritual beliefs. Again, a clever tool.
I like the contrast of flesh rotting in the lifeblood of rain. Death and life in the same moment from the same circumstances.
Overall I find the write interesting and challenging to interpret. Nonetheless, you give each reader the freedom to take what they will from your write. You show a subtle generosity with your intellect.

[Natalie Dieudonne]

Hate the meaningless reasons
Behind the curtains.

really nice line. Your style of writing is interesting...

[wordman]

I see a lot of emotions unsure about self and existence powerful write
we all belong we just need to figure out where

[jacob erin-cilberto]

we learn from life, it hardens us, it cuts us...but we survive to see tomorrow...and maybe the rotten flesh can come back to life...the spring rains bring summer and rebirth.

life wears us down, but doesn't necessarily beat us...unless we let it.

[Kim's Poems]

emotional piece here and quite powerful

[nenestarrs]

This poem seems sad to me only at the end I get a ray of hope. I love how you phrased your words. It delivered a vivid picture that I appreciate when I read a poem.

[An owl on the moon]

Reason seems to wrestle with existence... thoughts fierce fighting on emotional steps... What an honest, piercing work.

[Andrea]

Nice work!

[aaron]

beautiful. its been some time sense i read something like this. its depressing yet enlightening, and somehow calming and joyful all at once. maybe i only see it that way. but its like your looking for your awncers. i hope you fined them.