Destitute Majesty

The most powerful poems have more than one meaning

Its tenebrous beauty swallows me whole

Taking my dreams and shaking my soul

The infinite void presses my doubts

Changing my creed and removing my shroud

I have nowhere to hide from this ubiquitous pitch

Pervading my spirit and tearing my stitch

I am drowning within my own cognition

At the sight of this expansive opposition

Logic becomes a powerless fool

At the feet of this aphotic jewel 

Our trivial minds cannot grasp its splendor

For it is neither the side nor the center

I surrender, I surrender

Reviews

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear N.B. Mowery

Thank you for saying hello.

I thought, I would come and look at your poetry, opened this first piece and then nearly fell off my chair!

I am not usually effusive in my reviews, keeping to measured tones. But in the face of this little 'aphotic jewel' under which bushel have you been hiding your light?

I often do structured reviews. Not in this case.

My reviews are often rather long. But in this case (at least by own standards) I shall keep this brief.

Numbered points in random order by way of reaction:

1) A thirteen line stanza, rhyming in couplets until the last three lines which all rhyme. Very tightly structured and admirably so.

2) Use of English: Luxuriantly rich. 'tenebrous' 'ubiquitous' 'apposition' 'aphotic' You are clearly a wordsmith of some quality.

3) Meaning? You wish, you say, to give more than one meaning. So is the reader then left like a bloodhound to find both? You tempt the reader to guess. But as ever only the writer owns the meaning. The reader may guess and guess wrong, but is entitled, in fact must, in the end apply their own interpretation and here is mine.

The whole piece is redolent of an exhumation. The dead in his shroud, its stitch being torn. Everything is in contrast - life and death in 'apposition' light and darkness.

In the end you are brought back to life, you live no longer in the world where plants do not grow, in the world of the lifeless.

Your mind cannot comprehend, its logic defeated, once destitute in front of 'Majesty', you surrender.

This is the world of the Bible, whatever other meaning the poem may hold, perhaps the Old Testament and Ezekiel.

God is the bringer of light where previously darkness reigned and you have just brightened up this website with your own majesty, that of skilfully crafted poetry.

This for me is a brief review. But if anything all the more meaningful for it.

A wonderful piece of work.

Bravo.

Your friend


James Hanna-Magill

[Nix]

Thank you so much! I usually leave it up to the reader to decide what the meaning is. I have always found that if you thrust an idea at someone it will most likely not last, but if you lead someone to the idea and let them "find" it themselves then they will take it as their own and it will flourish. Thank you so much for your review! It definitely means something to be complimented by such a prolific artist. And you are quite the "wordsmith" yourself! I have to admit I stumbled over the pronunciation of some of your words! Once again thank you! I would love if you did have any constructive criticism also.
P.S. Have you published any of your work?

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear N.B. Mowery

Thank you for that.

In my reviews, I tend to seek balance between positive and adverse critique. So if there is something I dislike or a change I would propose, I will say so in a gentle way. Likewise if I find something praiseworthy, I do the same.

But in this case I found nothing to complain about at all.

If that is so it is merely because I found it well written.

Yes I have been published but not in any significant way. Split, is my first novel, which I have put on here for critique and (just as you) I wish as much adverse critique as I can get.

When getting ready to publish something, it's nice to know where a book works, but even better to know where it doesn't, when in heavy edit mode.

If you review anything of mine, I would encourage you to undertake a chapter by chapter review of Split.

It is a book about mental health disorders, in particular mine (bipolar disorder). It is fact told in a novelistic way - to comfort those who suffer and to educate those who don't.

A proportion of the proceeds will be streamed to mental health charities.

I shall be back to review more of your writing soon.

Your friend

James

[Nix]

I would love to read and attempt to critique "Split"! Although I don't know that I have much to offer in the way of advice. But I'll try anyways! Thank you for your time.

[James Hanna-Magill]

No problem. bear in mind in relation to any novel, all readers are good readers, as they are all potential buyers, James

[Nix]

Touche!

[Inda]

Wonderful piece, the best of your stuff that I've read so far. Very effective word usage and metaphors. Fantastic write!

[Nix]

Thank you once again Inda!

[Parsimony]

The suspense and mystery builds with each descriptive verse. "tenebrous beauty', ubiquitous pitch", aphotic jewel" all wonderful adjectives and superfluous vocabulary. The ending does not reveal much but is climatic enough to satisfy. Altogether enrapturing piece.

[Mark]

When we look into the abyss, we all see something different. God is much larger than our puny minds can comprehend, and surrender is always an option. Good work here.

[Nix]

Thank you mark!

[beyondpen]

:) Its like you've left readers thinking- its glass half empty or glass half full ... and can i say, that at first i thought, more than the poem, its the title thats adding to the readers confusion. I now know why i thought that- well coz i read the title n restricted myself...
well the poems your baby so only you know what it means... but i felt the poem with its exquisite imagery and intelligently used vocabulary ... is more than just about majesty or destitution... its about an excess of a thing or the complete lack of it ... about greed or fear...

[Nix]

This is the kind of poem left up for interpretation. Thank you so much for your review!
Warmest regards
-Nick

[Corwin T.]

The Biblical parallels, while intended or not, really do a lot for readers with a Biblical background. The entire flow and meaning of this poem is intrinsic to each respective reader who seeks to gain an understanding of its depths. I so look forward to reading more of your material in the future. The entire flow, the schemes, and the content of this poem was incredibly well played, linguistically, and professionally. Thank you for sharing, I look forward to reading more.

[Sami Khalil]

A really nice read and write...Thank you for sharing...:)

[Nix]

Thank you!

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure...:)

[Leslie Philibert]

A fine poem that deserves all the good reviews it has become,as noted, finely weighed couplets based an excellent vobabulary,the repeated last line adding a lot of drama. I look forward to reading more from you...

[Nix]

Thank you very much!

[Rebecca Buller]

At the feet of this aphotic jewel
Our trivial minds cannot grasp its splendor
For it is neither the side nor the center

Ah, such beauty in your words and such wonderful imagery. This is the sort of poem that one must read more than once because once simply isn't enough. Thank you for sharing this.

[Dark Rider]

I love this! You have an amazing way with details, and it just pulled me in from the start. Amazing job. :)