The Abyss

Teal waves break against the sand

White froth turns to gold

Bringing treasures of a foreign land

And places never told

Surrender to its pull and find

Its deceptive peace is left behind

The teal becomes abysmal blue

And gold becomes an inky black

The wild shows its true face

Or shows none at all

Upon seeing this grandeur

The other world seems so small

Reviews

[Corwin T.]

Love the description here. I can even taste the sea while I read this magnificent poem. The "And gold becomes an inky black." is well used here because it disrupts the flow of the poem. At first, to some readers, this may bring on a distraction. But for me, it halts the flow, and really makes you think of the sea and the imagery becoming visualized in the readers mind. Thank you for posting!! Great job.

[Sami Khalil]

A very beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing...:)

[Glen Yumang Manese]

You convey the tides and passing of the times in this read...and the structure of this show that with repeating lines:

Teal waves break against the sand
White froth turns to gold

and again here:

The teal becomes abysmal blue
And gold becomes an inky black

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

An almost curved piece the negates edges and a right wording fielding.

[Nix]

Thank you! I find rhythm to be of the utmost importance

[David Scott]

This poem is much like the beaches of Cancun... I see the proximity affects you well.
We vacation down there at least once a year. The area is dear to us.
Thank you for sharing your vision of the local beauty.

[Nix]

Thank you for your review!

[J Todd Underhill]

Well done would like to hear this on my radio show! www.worldpoetryopenmic.net for more information or listen live Fridays 8-9pm mountain www.kzkoradio.com. I write sonnets so I like the ABAB CDCD rhyme scheme

[Nix]

Thank you!

[Mariya]

We are sea miners. Depending on our views in life, the world can be abysmal or it can be Atlantis or Utopia ruled by pantisocracy.

This piece is brilliant. Thank you for sharing. :)

[Nix]

Thank you so much! Spot on!

[Rebecca Buller]

"Teal waves break against the sand
White froth turns to gold"

The sea has brought inspiration to poets for centuries & I hope to one day visit it. Your words brought me very close to it on this Monday morning over coffee. Thank you for sharing:)

[Nix]

Thank you so much! I am privileged to live right next to this "Abyss".

[Rebecca Buller]

Very cool:-)

[Mark]

Yes! One of the things that's always fascinated me about the sea... so lovely, so calm looking, listening to it gives me this inner feeling of peace... and yet it is so dangerous.

Wonderful work. :)