Battiest moments

A Story by Violet Batt

All the funniest things from my books put into one document

Battiest moments!!

This first one comes from book 1, chapter 7, sentences 18-20

Oh my gosh you almost scared the poop out of me!” I turned around and it was the yellow tannish bat. Then he said, “Actually it’s called guano.

This next one comes from book 1, chapter 8, sentences 2-3

Then he said something surprising “My name is David.” Then he turned into a human and I fainted.

This one is from book 1, chapter 14, sentences 10-11

Then David appeared behind me and kissed me. I fainted.

This one is book 2, chapter 10

Chapter 10

As soon as it was night again I got to the hospital all burnt like a piece of bread left in the toaster too long. The nurse said “What happened this time?” My cape was full of holes and I am steaming because I am so hot and so mad. And I had to walk here because I wouldn’t be able to fly with holes in my wings. Then after I explained what everyone did to me. The nurse was shocked because I know I should be dead all ready. So the solution is a bath in ice cubes while they fix my cape. After that was done they put pain cream on my burns and I felt a lot better instead of felling like a bag of steamed carrots.

This one is book 2, chapter 17

Chapter seventeen

We are in jail. I can’t believe it all over one stupid donut. David was full after all that blood he drank. Then I said “Why did you do that?” He answered “I was just protecting you Violet.” I hug him even though it was hard because he was so full of blood. Then David burped loudly. “Eww.” I said. Then David smiled. “How do we get out of here?” I asked him. He just sighed and surged his shoulders. Then I heard a trinkaling noise. I turn around and Cristafur just peed on the floor! “That’s disgusting.” I told him. “Sorry.” He said embarrassed. The sun was coming up so we climbed into the dirty broken beds and fell asleep.

This one is book 3, chapter 4

Chapter four

I woke up to find Cristafur missing. “Cristafur!” I yelled then he came in with bad burns and he smelled sweaty, His eyes where huge. The he said “I found the pineapples but their prickly!”

“Cristafur! I don’t tolerate burnt bats!” I reminded him. Then he peed on himself. “Sorry.” I said. Then I grabbed him and threw him in the ocean to help cool down. Then he said “Sorry.”

“Okay.” I said. Then I hauled a dripping wet Cristafur to the cave. Natasha laughed. Fear said “Natasha!” Natasha went to play.

This one is book 3, chapter 10

Chapter ten

We arrive at New York. First we must go to our hotel room. So we go to the door put our capes in our suite cases, except Zeanna who doesn’t have a cape. Then we enter everyone was staring at us I have no idea why. Maybe because there’s so many of us. Or could it be that we are so pale. Nope not just that but Sandra was smiling a big vampireous smile. Then Ashely and Boston quickly covered Sandra’s mouth. We ran to the elevator just in time.

This one is from book 4, chapter 10, sentences 7-15

That was because David had bad gas today. “Eww, David don’t sit on me when you have gas.” I told David. “But I like sitting in your lap Violet.” David whined. “No David, not even a second.” I told him. “Aww man!” David yelled then he farted on me any way. I shove him away.

This one is from book 4, chapter 18, sentences 3-10

Every one clapped and cheered until David got up and sang loudly, “Dance party! Dance party! Dance party!” Every one joined in, it was so embarrassing! David better not do that again.

This one is My pet bat Howard, chapter 4

Chapter Four

Then the bat opened his eyes then what surprised me was the bat said “Hello, my name is Howard, how do you do?” “Wow!” I said. Then I said “Howard bring your pet to school day is coming up. Can you come?” “Of course, Lilly,” Howard told me. “How do you know my name?” I asked. “Of course I know your name, now excuse me I may make some Guano.” Howard said. I giggled. It was settled I bring Howard to school tomorrow.

This one is My pet bat Howard, chapter 7

Chapter Seven

I followed Howard upstairs to my room. Howard shuts the door behind me. A little hard to do if you have wings though. Then he said “So you want to be just like me?” “Yes.” I answered. He continued “You want to stay up all night long?” “Yes.” I said. Howard continues “You want to fly like a bat?” “Yes yes.” I said. “You want to hang upside down?” Howard said. “Yes, Appsalootly,” I said. “You want to live a long, long time?” Howard says. “Definitely,” I yelled. “Whoa my way ears.” Howard said. “Well I know a way to make you the way you want but we must go someplace else to do it okay.” Howard finished. “Okay.” I said.

This one is from book 5, chapter 1, Last two sentences

Then a big burst of noise came from down the hall. Oh, no, you’ll never believe who it is, or will you?

This one is from book 5, chapter 2, sentences 1-3

It was David of course! David was singing Christmas songs as loud as he could. Then he saw me and started singing ‘Dance Party’!

This one is book 5, chapter 4

Chapter four

Then, David gets out and starts partying again. “David!!! Stop, your killing me!” I yelled. He didn’t listen so I wacked him in the stomach. “Owwwwwwwwwwww!” He yelled. I glared at him. Then I said, “You sound more like a wolf then a vampire.” So he punched me in the stomach and I screamed. Then Howard gave us a strange look then laughed. Then Lilly came and said, “Howard!” Then Howard said, “I’ll be back. I just will make some guano to put on the hotel manager’s bed. Then he giggled all the way out the door. Lilly giggled at his comment and then we stayed up the rest of the night.

This one is from book 5, chapter 14, sentence 1

Chapter fourteen

Howard poops on the managers head.

This one is book 5 chapter 19-20

Chapter nineteen

David has a new song it goes like this, David is Appsalootly Batty and Violet is no fun. David is A-p-p-s-a-l-o-o-t-l-y-B-a-t-t-y and Violet is just no fun-un-un. Yah! I am never going to get over it. David comes up and sings, “David is Appsalootly Batty and Violet is no fun. David is A-p-p-s-a-l-o-o-t-l-y-B-a-t-t-y and Violet is no fun-un-un. Yah!” So I sang, “Violet is Appsalootly Batty and David is no fun. Violet is A-p-p-s-a-l-o-o-t-l-y-B-a-t-t-y and David is no fun-un-un. Yah!”

“You got it Violet!”David cheered. Everyone laughed at us.“Daaaaavvvvviiiddd!!!!!” I screamed at David. He fell over. Oh and he’s not wearing casts any more. David flies away.

Chapter 20 Twenty

David has fried chicken again. He holds it tight. I distract him so he’s not looking at his chicken. Cristafur slips the chicken out of David’s hand and runs away. David turns back and bites down on his hand. “Owwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!” David screamed. “Oops!” I said. “Cristafur!!!” David yelled. Cristafur was sharing his chicken with Fear and Natasha. “Thank you David!” Cristafur, Fear and Natasha said. “David you’ll never learn.” I told him. Then I looked at his pathetic pale face of sorrow and patted his back. “It’s okay, you’ll get over it.” I said.

This one is Absolutely batty, chapter 1, sentences 4-6 and 10-12

That’s when a pale skin figure wearing all black with thick golden hair sticking out of an enormous sun hat and big sun glasses shows up. You could see the mounds of sun block oozing down his arms… David’s sunglasses slip down his face to reveal his sparkling blue eyes. “Sorry Violet, I’m not used to this much sun yet.”

This one is Absolutely batty, chapter 2, last sentence.

One strange thing is David’s last name is Batt.

This one is Absolutely batty, chapter 4-5

Chapter 4 Later that night…

It is now the night of my birthday. All my guests have showed up including David Batt. David looked like he had more energy than he did this morning in class. “Hey Violet, Come here!” David yelled to me. “What is it David?” I asked him. He smiled a very suspicious smile. Then out of nowhere he quickly said, “I like you. Can I use your bathroom?” He smiled bigger. There’s something strange about that smile, it’s so captivating. I sat there Mesmerized by his face. Then he said, “Seriously Violet, can I use your bathroom?”

“Oh, oh, yes of course you can David.” I said. He rushed to the bathroom and Cristafur yelped again and darted away. Voice came up behind me and said, “There’s something Batty about this boy.” I said, “That’s not funny.” Voice walked away.

Chapter 5 At school…

“So, David,” I said. “Yes Violet?” He answered me. “Me and my brother think you’re suspicious,” I told him. “I mean, my mom found bat poop in the bathroom sink.” I finished. David said, “Well actually it’s called guano and I’m not suspicious.” I say, “How do you know what it’s called?” He says, “Well I like vampires if that explains anything.” A glob of sunscreen slips down his face. “Yah, you just like vampires, I think something else is going on.” I tell him. “Also why do you like my bathroom?” David does a face palm. Ashely pops up between us and says, “Ooo, do you like him? Will you get married? Will you run away? Can I help you? What’s the answers to our test? Ahh, Violet, you look awesome today. Are you going to class or not? Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go!”

This one is Absolutely batty, chapter 7

Chapter seven Love

It is afternoon and almost time to go home. I meet David by the door. “David,” I said. “Yes Violet?” David answers. “David, I love you.” David smiles. Then he says, “That’s what I was trying to tell you. Of course I don’t love your bathroom.” Cristafur is spying on us. Then Voice walks over to him. Cristafur whispers something to Voice. Voice walks over and tries to separate me form David. “Hey, what’s that for?!” I asked. “Violet, I’m sorry to say this, but David’s a vampire you can’t love him.” David looks a fended by that comment. I say, “I love him any way.” David smiles. That’s when I remember, his fangs, that’s what made his smile so cute. Cristafur is screaming and yelling. “That explains the guano in the sink,” I say. David looks embarrassed.

Last but not least the grand finally blow up! The vampire princess chapter 18

Chapter 18, red button

Back at the castle…

Wisdom runs down the stairs to greet Jack. “Oh, Jack, I’m glad you’re okay. Listen Jack come with me to Terro’s place now that we have time to get the other jewel piece.”

“Sure let’s go!” Jack said.

At the secret hide out of Terro…

The two teenage bats slip down the stairway to Terro’s layer. Terro says, “Well, well, well, look who came back.”

“Shut up stink dog,” Jack said. Then Wisdom crept towards the piece, but Jack said, “Oooh! What does this big red button do?”

“No! Don’t do it Jack!” Wisdom pleaded. Jack pressed the button. “Whoopsy!” Jack yelled. Then Wisdom grabbed Jack and they rushed out of there. Later the hideout explodes. “Jack!! Why would you do that?!” Wisdom yelled. Jack just sat there with sword and shield looking as if he could cry.

I hope you enjoyed this special Batty moment! :)