Curbed

Maybe I without seeing here, can give in to you,

so watch me--be just like you; and kneading, big surprise...

I could if you give into me

so I can feel like you.

Sure I--cure like you, if you feed it through with both hands

it makes it much sweeter--

oh, big surprise...

Now scratch my sky, white pony, so I can grow right in you--just to tease myself;

wouldn't kill the grain, this gift of mine...

 

 

See I--can be just like you, a stranded grudge, oh, I can fit my eyes

...if you fixate on me; and f**k like you.

Cute poison, yes you are--

seems too clear.

Cute poison, ingest, no fear, make me fly.

Now I, can give in to you

and break your pose if it fits my eye. Looks like--you're kneading your jar,

this vial can't crawl down--

Cute poison, you're still a deathblow

giving a new star for my vase for me to sleep weak.

Reviews

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

mmmmm addiction....sweet painful death.

[MoriartyMesa]

Now here is one of the things I love about reading, the muse behind the work. I bet there is a very interesting tale behind this work....

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

tricksy words, these are.. love it. there's this pacing thing you do in your writing that just pulls me in. and a sensuality.. maybe it's just me, but there seems to be an underlying sensuality in your words, just teasing at the edges

[Vile]

Thnk you for all the lovely reviews, Im glad you enjoy my work. :D. And yes, I do attempt to place a certain sensuality to it.

[QuietlyCrash]

Wow. I always find myself rereading your work. I just can't get my head around it and I think that's what I love about it. It's so different and it makes you want to keep reading even after you get to the last line. Fantastic. Thanks for sharing.
-Riley

[Sharon L.H. Kelly]

Wow, your writing always intrigues me. Never sure where I'm going, but I always hang on for the ride! Perhaps your title could be White Pony. Something that sounds benign (to some), then the AHHA moment of realization.

[Astro]

Always an exercise in strange beauty as I read your lines, of experimental view points and the personally described experiences. Definitely a curious attraction.

[Vile]

Thank you for the review, man. Gladyou enjoyed it. :D

[The Verse: A Poetry Jou..]

I was so close to ignoring this RR as soon as I read the title, but so worth the read. Again the title really bothers me, specially when it is repeated so much in the actual poem. so, that would be a suggestion, to edit the title. other than that, my best compliments on the diction and symbolism.

[Vile]

Hahahaha well Im glad you found it worth the read and decided to go forth with the read. I appreciate it. And I do slightly agree about the title, though Im unsure what to change it to.

[The Verse: A Poetry Journal]

sometimes, the titles challenge us more, but we must remember their importance. The title shouldn't give it all away.

[Vile]

Ya I kind of slacked on the title for this one I was just unsure what to title it. Usually Im more thoughtful of my titles.

[Sam A]

Usually such an obscure meaning would cause me to stop reading, but your rhythm and wording kept me going. I look forward to reading more!

[Vile]

Well, dont I feel like a special little snow flake. :D. Glad you liked it, man.

[Quill~]

Intriguing! I hate that don't you?... She's poisonous and you know it, but you can't help yourself...
I get it....believe me, I get it. ;)
You've taken something familiar and given it a nice twist. Love it! Nicely done Vile! :)

[Vile]

Thank you for the kind words. :D

[Quill~]

:) you're an intriguing writer... I enjoyed reading you.

[Vile]

Good, :D. I look forward to future reviews. I havnt written anything new in a few weeks, Ive been meaning to get to it haha.

[Quill~]

life keeps you busy... I understand...
same here... :)
looking forward to reading your new ones...write on V! :D