--The Art of Warn--

This story talks about being a weak person and both of the journals derive from that.

07/28/2010
I have been giving a though, To smoking/toking and just frankly not giving a thought. I tell myself how wonderful would it be to just blow off some steam "Or in my case smoke Marijuana".
I keep proclaiming to myself that it will be fun... Aww man I just  know I'll be a weak person if I do it without a reason... 
But, Maybe
Maybe I'm just trying to justify something that I know I want to do, But I know damn well,
I don't have the self discipline to stop.
9/26/2010
Why Am I here! I see no one my age^ All I see is old people and it's depressing, Yea maybe they stopped doing drugs and are all on there 12 step program but does that truly matter if I am going to end up old and worn out like them. Each meeting I go to all they do is talk about how Na or AA has changed there life but do I really want to grow old as these sack of s***s... Hell no!!! give me all the damn liquor and tobacco I can handle, And then some... Each day I take will be closer to death and if anyone questions my motives I will just look them in the eyes and say " I smoke I drink and you ask why, Well I'll tell you! So that each day I get closer to not seeing your sorry a*s"
There was an inner motive to my destruction though- It wasn't merely that I didn't want to be old, No there was more to it than that. It was the fact that once i reached a certain age I would start forgetting who I was as a individual and one day all I would be was a sack of worthless s**t wasting away at nothing.

Author's Note

Reading through all excerpts of my writing and stumbled upon something that led me to write this. Conclusion Has no end, So no ending

Reviews

[chandlerl]

Nicely written.
Your writing is one I've seen through my very own eyes, wondering where I belong in the NA program when all I see is a bunch of old people. That is where I once was, but now I have a different outlook, NA is my family and just because of my young age, it does not make me not an addict, but even more so an addict, who has simply found recovery at a young age. Thank you for your write it truly made me look into myself and at my own addictions and journeys. Thanks.
Keep writing. =)