The Grasshopper and the Ants (XXI Century Version with Apologies to Aesop)

This is a retelling of the classic Aesop version (also included) from a 21st Century perspective. Alas, little has changed but for the aggressiveness and entitlements of the grasshoppers.

THE GRASSHOPPER AND THE ANTS by Aesop (Project Gutenberg, new translation, http://www.gutenberg.org)

One fine day in winter some Ants were busy drying their store of corn, which had got rather damp during a long spell of rain. Presently up came a Grasshopper and begged them to spare her a few grains, “For,” she said, “I’m simply starving.” The Ants stopped work for a moment, though this was against their principles. “May we ask,” said they, “what you were doing with yourself all last summer? Why didn’t you collect a store of food for the winter?” “The fact is,” replied the Grasshopper, “I was so busy singing that I hadn’t the time.” “If you spent the summer singing,” replied the Ants, “you can’t do better than spend the winter dancing.” And they chuckled and went on with their work.

_________________________

21st Century Version of the Grasshopper and the Ants (by Victor D. Lopez, fan of ants everywhere and every when)

A grasshopper once came upon a colony of ants seeing to the fall harvest.

“Give me some grain. I’m hungry” he said.
“Where is your winter store?” they asked.
“Don’t have one. Too busy singing all summer” he replied.
“Well, if you sang all summer instead of working, you may as well
Dance all winter,” they replied smiling and returning to work.

The grasshopper turned from green to red, fuming.
“The harvest is not yours! You did not build it!
You did not make it rain.
You did not cause the sun to shine.
You just reaped the bounty of mother earth.
That belongs to us all. Now give me my fair share!”

The ants kept working, smiled and shook their heads.

The grasshopper cursed and stomped away.
But he returned an hour later with many kindred spirits.
They beat the ants silly while stealing their grain.
And as they beat them they chanted catchy slogans
While pumping firsts in the air:

No justice no peace!
Power to the people!
It takes a village!
Yes we can!
Soak the rich!
Property is theft!

Then they took away all the grain they could carry,
And burned the rest to teach the unconscious ants a lesson.
Back at their village, the grasshoppers had a wondrous feast.
It lasted three full days until the food ran out.
When winter came, they begged nearby villages for food.
But they were also populated by singers, dancers and actors who’d likewise
Spent the summer singing, dancing and making love, not war.

So having no food, they held hands, hugged a tree and
Sang Cumba Ya while lamenting the tragedy that had befallen them.
“All their fault. All their fault” they whined in unison.
“Those stupid, egotistical, greedy, inhumane, hoarding, hate-filled
Worthless bugs. Why could they not have been as enlightened as we?”