The Stars In The Sky

I look up at the stars on the clearest summer night

And ponder just how far it took these tiny dots of light

To travel through the heavens that we all call space

Through the eye and received by the back of all our brains

 

But eyes can be deceiving and light can be the same

Just because you see them doesn't mean they haven't changed

With great amounts of mass light will bend and skew

And by the time the light arrives one star may be two

Still we stare a distant gaze at ancient photographs

Looking through a time machine to see who's looking back

But in this void of space the only conscience that is has

Is the conscience of your conscience thinking 'I think there fore I am' 

 

The only way to really see the stars up in the sky

Is clear the brain of what you know and simply close your eyes

Fore all the stars that you see are not that far away

Every single one exists only in your brain

Reviews

[Wolfwind Words]

Perhaps it was just me. But This piece took me in two directions. One into the realm of science and the rules and laws that light is governed by. The other into the realm of belief and faith. For each can be valid of an particular individual. I found this piece provoking as it challanged the mind to expand past it's normal existance and step, not only outside of the self for a moment, but then be pulled back into the depths of our own psychy.

A thinker for me! Truly Enjoyed!
Infinity's Shadow

[Shell]

I like this. I'm not much of a fan of rhyming but the imagery leads me past that and deeper into the words. It's a "read out loud" poem, and that is a good thing. I often find myself staring at the stars and pondering many things. You bring them inside...

[Kevon]

great peice, u seem to mainly write stories so to see a great poem from a story writer is a great thing, kudos

[Scott H.]

Loved this, loved this, loved this. The flow is great, and the mixture of wonderment and science is really a nice juxtaposition. Excellent piece!

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

Well written poem. I like it very much. Thank you for sharing. Debileah

[Tuff Stuff]

I usually don't read poems, but this was an exception. It was probably the best poem I've read on this website. It's the only one so far that has really put an image in my head the whole way through.
I very much LOVED IT!

[Truc]

Wow! When I read this, it totally created an image into my head. I love this part: "And ponder just how far it took these tiny dots of light".

[hannahthemaid]

And so ...
all that is out there
is only but an inner illusion of things not ever even there at all
just a nightscape of sheerest nothingness
your very awesome words created this instant image ...

[Michael]

I like this one a lot. I take it you did not try to meter but it is very close nonetheless to being metered and has a natural flow about it. Its message is well supported by the structure. Shorter lines would have worked against the great distances of the heavens. That was a nice touch. I do see one small nit though: recieved should be received I think.

Great job!