The Sweetest Journey

Fiction

Today I looked death in the face. It’s not the way I would have imagined, I wasn’t gripped with fear, I didn’t scream, my life didn’t flash before me. I barely had time to register what was happening as he lost control. I held my breath, not really believing my eyes. In that moment the silence was deafening. As if in slow motion we ploughed into the path of an oncoming, metal, giant.
***
‘Hurry up will you, I’m sure you do this on purpose’.
Knowing he needed no excuse to tear a strip off me I crammed my essentials into a bag, tied my hair up and made do with a slick of lip gloss.
‘Coming!’ Taking the stairs two at a time I tripped halfway down but managed to save myself by grabbing the banister. No harm done. My escalating clumsiness was either entertainment or invitation for insults depending on his mood.
Jakes moods were becoming increasingly unpredictable, he could swing from affectionate to menacing in the blink of an eye. It wasn’t always that way I mused but then I wasn’t always this clumsy.
A day out was just what we needed, the idea of the Christmas fayre was appealing, stalls laden with decorations and gifts and a steaming hot chocolate, today would be a good day.
‘Only six more sleeps’ I said my breath coming in visible clouds.
‘How old are you Jenna’ he teased.
We chatted about our plans for Christmas day until Jake went quiet, he seemed distracted all of a sudden.
‘Let’s pick up a bottle of wine for tonight’ I suggested silently preying for his good mood to continue.
‘Mmmm’
‘You OK?’ I shifted in the passenger seat so as to read his expression.
He fiddled with the radio a small frown making him appear much older than his 26 years.
‘Jake!’
‘What, sorry, yea I’m ok’.
Unconvinced I wisely kept quiet.
We drove in silence then, Christmas songs filling the void. Lost in my own thoughts I rested my head on the window. Was it so long ago that we were happy? I used to know exactly who I was. When had my confidence started shrinking? I was struggling with simple decisions, doubting my own mind.
I remember noticing changes after we moved in together, subtle to begin with. He’d ask about my day, who I’d spoken to and where I’d been but instead of a pleasant conversation he’d scowl and accuse me of fancying clients. One time he threw a plant at my head because I’d been for lunch with a group of colleagues and two of them happened to be men. The fact that one of them was gay and the other old enough to be my grandfather offered little reassurance. I ducked and the plant pot smashed against the wall. I cleared up the mess and from then on was careful with the details I’d share with him. His rages seemed to be fuelled by jealousy and control. He’d recently taken it upon himself to become my fashion consultant advising me about what to wear or what not to wear. I knew I was allowing him too much control over me but what choice did I have if I wanted to avoid another outburst? He could be so generous and thoughtful other times I found myself making excuses for his bad behaviour.
Shaking myself back to the present I watched the snow falling in soft flakes.
‘You know I love you don’t you Jenna’ his sharp tone piercing the silence. He made what should have been a sweet declaration sound more like an accusation. He looked at me, he only took his eyes off the road for a moment. That one moment and everything changed.
A vehicle was parked on our side of the road and coming towards us was a lorry there was nowhere to go, no way of stopping in time. Jake hit the breaks hard but they locked and we skidded out of control.
‘S**t!’ he yelled.
Desperately trying to right the skid Jake turned the wheel one way then the other but it was pointless. I was thrown about in my seat. Everything seemed to slow down and the smell of burning rubber filled my senses. Glass shattered, metal crushed, I could taste blood but I couldn’t see where it was coming from. I felt dizzy, disorientated. Then it was as if the world just stopped, an eerie silence followed. Jake wasn’t moving, he looked deathly pale with just a trickle of blood coming from his nose. Trying to focus I managed a strangled whisper ‘Jake’. No response, he was unconscious for sure, possibly dead. I didn’t know what to do next. I tried my door, it opened so I staggered out of the twisted heap of metal. I could see the impact was on the drivers side, then everything swam out of focus.
I woke inside an ambulance. It took a moment for me to realise why. Then as the horror of the crash invaded my mind I remembered his pale face, the blood.
‘Oh god Jake! Is he, is he OK?’ I couldn’t breathe as panic set in.
‘He’s critical but alive’ offered one of the paramedics.
Relief flooded my body and I let out a huge sigh. He’s alive, I held on to that glint of hope like my own life depended on it. For all Jakes faults I still cared about him and wouldn’t wish him harm. One thing I did know was that it was time I took control of my own life. My injuries were superficial, concussion, bruising, whiplash and one cracked rib.
I recovered well apart from the occasional nightmare. Jake was in a coma for three days. Although more seriously hurt than me once he was passed the worst he was expected to make a full recovery. He’d need physiotherapy and we were both told how lucky we’d been.
The Officers investigation ruled the crash an accident due to bad weather conditions. We were told if the collision had been head on that neither of us would have survived.
Those words haunted me as much as the crash itself.
I left Jake two weeks later having spent my recovery time soul searching. Now I know what I don’t want from life I can focus my energy on finding out what I do. Whatever mistakes, victories, triumphs I make, it will be my own sweet journey.
The end

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

This well-written story held my interest throughout. Could it be based on some truth? It certainly sounds as if it might be. Fortunately for our lady, the trauma of the car wreck shook her into ending the bad relationship with her controlling, possibly bi-polar lover.
The piece is quite readable, but could benefit from closer attention to punctuation.

[Vicky Hand]

Thank you and yes it's not completely fictitious. It is a first draft and very raw but I was keen to receive some honest feedback. I'm glad you found it interesting. Now time to edit and polish.

[TheGodOfEnglish123]

Well Done :) This Story Is Amazing, congrats on the brill Story.

[Vicky Hand]

Thank you GodofEnglish you are too kind ☺

[Tony Jordan]

I did not see that coming. A TV movie resolution and recommittment to love was what I thought was en route. But after I thought about it I think she took the right course of action for them both.
I loved the bickering at the start - I mean who hasnt reached that stage in a relationship just before implosion. So it's very relate-able and very easy to read (for a non-story reader/reviewer).

Thanks for posting Vicky.
:)

[Vicky Hand]

Thanks I'm glad you were surprised by the ending. I'm a complete beginner so really appreciate the feedback.

[Tony Jordan]

Well Im no story writer so I only remark on how it feels - I havent a notion about structure and plot and the rest but plenty here do. You'l learn a lot here Vicky. Welcome to the WC. Enjoy your stay!
:)

[Vicky Hand]

Thanks I have lots to learn

[Tony Jordan]

You sound eager and willing. Keep it lit.

[Peter Rogerson]

You've got a good style here but I'd like to make one observation you might find trivial, annoying even. I find the tiny font difficult to cope with and have to use the zoom facility. Would it be possible for you to enlarge your font? In my own work I use size 14. But that's really by the by. I found the work to be well written and interesting (praying rather than preying, by the way).

[Vicky Hand]

I'm so pleased by the positive feedback and quiet surprised. I will change the font with pleasure. Thank you!

[Vicky Hand]

I can't see how to change the font size. Can you help?

[Peter Rogerson]

On the editor page right click, select all, then at the top of the editor select font size. I use 14. Or, alternatively, write using Word or Open Office or any WP, set your text size in that and it should transfer.

[grayscale]

I love this short story, although a bit sad at the end i felt it was very well written, thank you for sharing.

[Vicky Hand]

Thank you so much I'm new to this. I've never actually finished a story before.

[grayscale]

Well then, welcome , and I look forward to some finished works then.

[Vicky Hand]

Thanks I'm searching for inspiration for my next short.