Unrelated conjecture

This happened to be lurking in my head, and it apparently had to get out of there.

A storm attacking the walls outside,

the peace gone from within my mind,

floor tiles creaking beneath my feet

as I shuffle quietly in defeat.

Demonic figures with ashen faces!

Assault the castle walls,

grim-faced and terrifying,

arms hidden behind spiked shields,

wearing bloodied skin and padding.

I listen closer, waiting for my turn,

edging towards a window but too afraid to learn.

A crowd stands in front of me, pushing and shoving,

trying to peek out the window of knowing.

Swords, axes, spears,

cast down like a man's tears,

ashen faces seeking to pull out all these years

of pain and torture.

I listen closer and hear it all,

for I do not see, I only recall:

names, places, familiar faces,

gone in a cloud of smoke and fire.

Now I am determined,

not to know, not to see.

I just want to sleep.

Author's Note

The usual. Constructive criticism is appreciated. Though keep in mind that I am no poet.

Reviews

[Tam Warink]

A mystery, why so much of your writing (here on the WC) is not reviewed? Well, here goes...

This piece, graphical in the extreme and painted from the minds-eye perspective, holds the keys to your psyche. Modern science is only just assembling the tools and knowledge to explain why the human mind contorts under weight of distant times - or future times for that matter. In this instance it could be a "simple" (ha ha - is it ever?) case of genetic memory. Perhaps you have some ancestor(s) that were in some way involved. Thoughts are not inherently dark or light but that the mind colors (colours) them with the palette of memory. Some the writer is aware of and others not so much.

The challenge, "I just want to sleep." Oh, yes... where IS that damn OFF-BUTTON?

Nicely journal'd, seasoned and shared.

[Mikael Malmberg]

There must be some secret to getting lots of reviews - perhaps I just never tried to get people to review these. Sending private messages to lots of people feels like intruding upon them, which is why I do not bother with that - though perhaps that opinion needs some revision.

As to the piece itself, it would be interesting indeed if this is actually a depiction of my mind-scape. Not that it is, mind - at least, not any more than any piece of writing, esoteric or not, is a depiction of the one who wrote it. This piece does have a kind of a meaning - the ashen faces, the crowds, the window of knowing and the memories disappearing in puffs of smoke and fire all point towards it - but it's not exact. I think, and perhaps you will agree, that poems are often better left a little bit vague. The holes make them intriguing.

An interesting interpretation, and an enjoyable review. Thank you.

[Tam Warink]

Absolutely, keep it vague and keep them guessing! lol