Bitter Sweet Nightmares

Bittersweet Nightmare

I sit in class and wait. I don't know what I'm waiting for, but I feel it within me. I'm laughing and talking with my friends completely disregarding the teacher at the front of the classroom and he is watching me. Always watching me, a shadow at the back of the classroom directly across from me near the back door. Then the light falls away and the class is empty save for us, one lone projector illuminates our faces as suddenly he is no longer across the room but directly in front of me. As he leans in I follow his example and the side of our faces are pressed against each other. His hair smells delicious as it always does, and I inhale more trying to hold onto this moment forever. His hot breath caresses my ear, "You're so broken…" He whispers and the words make shivers run down my spine. I am so broken, fix me. I think and rub against him as in a feline way; only you can save me… He starts to fade away like a phantom, and my chest starts to feel hollow, and it hurts. Like my heart was made of glass and someone was pounding on it. A warm wetness spreads through the top half of my body smelling like rust and salt, blood. The pounding never stops, I don't know how much more I can take, the scent of my blood starts to choke me like poisonous fumes, blocking my throat and burning my nostrils. Darkness engulfs me on all sides, I'm so broken…

Night 2
Where am I? It's so dark, so cold… I feel a primal terror crashing around inside me like a caged beast trying to break free, but I can't fight, I can't scream! There's a crushing weight on top of me pinning my arms and legs to the icy floor of wherever I am, the weight intensifies on my chest pressing against me in the most painful way. I try to struggle, I can't stay, I won't stay… Claws then sink into my arms and the weight on my chest disappears, I cry out finally as the pain settles on my arms, blood, more blood is flowing from my wounds. I thrash wildly, I can't see. "Stop fighting, stay here with me forever." He coos his voice lovely and seductive. The sickening part is that I give into him. I know I shouldn't, but how can I not? He hurts me over and over again but I want to be by his side forever, all this pain has begun to feel like pleasure and I want more. A sharp point touches the place above my heart then slices down with enough force that I feel my bones and skin tearing apart most likely creating a hole in me. I scream but my body doesn't respond, I've already stopped fighting him. His hand slips inside and holds my frantic heart. "I will always love you." Are his last words, and they are a lie but I hold onto them like they are my life. In a split second he rips my heart out of my chest and I die.

Night 3
I'm in a car in the passenger seat. The windows are heavily tinted but I can still watch the sun scream murder as it sinks away giving up the sky to the moon. I feel safe, I turn and see him driving, and he smiles at me. I know that pretty face is a disguise for the frozen hell that lies within him but I adore him. My beloved demon…  Eyes as blue as the morning summer sky, skin as smooth and white as snow he was beautiful. The car stops we are in front of an old church, catholic, with gothic architecture and stained glass windows where saints and angels look at us their faces unreadable. Then somehow we're in the backseat, he's kissing me and I'm kissing him back. His hands are everywhere and yet somehow I can't get enough of him. His hand makes its way to my upper thigh stroking it softly then letting his fingers wander to my very private part. He is amazing, everything should be perfect, but it's not. A sense of dread starts building inside of me, I don't want him to stop but I feel like if I don't something horrible will happen. His lips start freezing mine and a frost travels from my mouth down to the rest of my body. No, please no! I know what's going to happen I feel it deep inside me. The cracking sound began and the last thing I saw were his eyes staring into mine before I shatter into a thousand pieces.

Night 4
Give me peace, it's all I want. No, no, no… I want you. Darkness, darkness, darkness… Envelopes me, but it's only you… I desire… I desire you! I can't see him but I feel him inside like a frozen wasteland in my soul. I didn't want him inside me, "Even if it means dying to exist get out of me with a kiss." I say and that frost starts moving, crawling up my throat to my mouth. Slimy cold strokes that tear my insides up and blood starts to spread inside me.  I tried coughing but he was in my mouth, then eventually he expelled himself from within me ripping my tongue away as he left and lingering a second on my lips. 'Your pain inspires me." He said and I saw him in his normal form licking blood off his fingers. "We tried to make it good, but it's too late. So I'm moving on, but I won't forget all that is unsaid. Every second that I've spent with you like the winter is bringing the blues; you and I were like the spring… Brief and beautiful." I say and my I collapse, my heart breaking and burning but beneath that I feel something else, despite the violence and hurt there's the beauty of hope. So I die, and like with all destruction there is always rebirth.