Walls

Written in a man's place.

                    Walls

Tall ivied walls, impossible to climb,

Enclosing all, that once was mine.

Stone block walls, reach to the sky,

Turrets on corners, beautiful to the eye.

A wondrous edifice, glorious to see,

High on a hill, over looking the sea.

So much beauty, on the outside,

Enclosing my heart, until love lied.

Once I dwelt too, behind those walls;

Until lured outside, by a 'siren's call.'

Finding out to late, the shallowness of,

A false beauty, much to cold to love.

True love dwells...locked away inside,

Mine before...I cheated and lied.

I left all, that was true wealth behind;

Safely stored out of sight, but not of mind.

In longing I stand, and look up the hill.

My heart longing, to be up there still.

Behind those walls, enclosed in love's dream;

For me to be welcome, is  an impossible thing.

I look up at all, I foolishly... threw away;

Knowing those walls, locked me out...to stay.

   Valentine

Reviews

[D Connolly]

Sometimes a choice keeps us from returning to normal, like that saying You can never go home again, though it's literal in this poor guy's circumstance! The "siren" as you call it is cunning, but it is in our best interest to appreciate what we have already, lest we lose it all in a gamble

[Valentine]

Dani, divorce rate is very high, no telling what causes the failures. Kathie

[Luther Calvin]

This is a very good use of metaphor. You begin with a physical concept, one everyone is familiar with, and define it. As the poem progresses, the definition takes on new layers of meaning. That moment of revelation that the reader has whenever they see the metaphors in this story is simply marvelous. Well done, and keep writing.

[Valentine]

Thank you. Kathie

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest, true and powerful use of words.
"True love dwells...locked away inside,
Mine before...I cheated and lied.
I left all, that was true wealth behind;
Safely stored out of sight, but not of mind."
The above lines could be my tale. Easy to hide and be locked away. We must be brave one day and live for the people missed and to be found. Thank you dear friend for sharing your amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Valentine]

Thank you John for taking the time to read my writes. Kathie

[Coyote Poetry]

I have always time for you and you are welcome Kathie.

[Ted Kniffen]

I like this, Kathy, but it need not be just a man's perspective, just that of a frail human. It was well written, with lovely rhymes and good meter. It reads well. Good write.

[Valentine]

Ted, had to be a male to be able to use the word sirens. Kathie

[.]

An interesting idea, peering over the wall's into the soul of a man, and wanting to be once again on the other side of that wall. Yet not being welcomed and able to climb over it.

A sad piece of writing, yet also true to everyday life for some unfortunate souls.

[Valentine]

Thank you for stopping in. Kathie

[Giulia King]

Colorful lines, beautiful flow, left me with a vivid image.

[Valentine]

What about the cheating spouse?

[Tony Jordan]

We only miss the water when the well runs dry (a song lyric)
I think you play a man very well Kathie.
Coudl I suggest that instead of duplicating the word 'longing' in the penultimate stanza you replace the first instance with 'yearning'??
Anyways its your write.
But I got a familiar feel upon reading this but not from personal experience - I never cheat but I don't seem to be able to stop losing love.
Well penned Kathie.
Yes... I liked this.

[Valentine]

Tony, I didn't even notice that. Thanks for pointing it out. Mom used the word longing a lot, perhaps I am more like her than I realized. Kathie

[Tony Jordan]

Aww Kathie - that brought a lump to my throat. Thanks for sharing that.
'Longing' is such a beautifully evocative word.
God Bless.

[wordman]

sad write kathie,we make our own prisions

[Valentine]

In this write Ron, he cheated and lied so what did he expect. So a picture of a beautiful old castle type in England that brought in the walls etc. Kathie

[DoormanDan]

Regrets are easy things to have in life. I know for a fact I have them. I don't really try to follow the philosophy of live with no regrets though. Instead, I say let regret be a teacher. Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed this piece. I actually find that I can't say much else when I read your work, because your work is so consistently good that I can't really say much else at this point! You're really good at making your work emanate emotion. :)

[Valentine]

Thank you Dan, for your age I find your mind close to being one of the brightest on here. What ever you choose to do in your live I fell you will excel at it. Enjoy your years at school. Kathie

[A. Hannah]

This literally took my breath away, biting my lip as I absorbed these words.
The visual of the house atop the hill was so well described I was there amongst the ivy. The mood shift in the second stanza, last few words was like a dark cloud. Very awesome! A tragedy very well told!

[Valentine]

Thank you for your kind words. Kathie