Mourning

i am mourning for my lost old self

lost in believing false promises

lost in trusting too much

i miss my old self

its innocent smile

its innocent laughter

i am searching 

but am searching in vain

new promises came, I wanted to cherish them

new trusts being asked, I wanted to touch

but my broken heart is dubious to them

defense has become its natural response

i am mourning for my lost old self

i am mourning because it's forever gone