Carpets

My debut poem to be published on this site. Hope you enjoy it :)

She enters

Her head is filled with

empty thoughts

of her next pull and

vanity.

Lights on her

Flicker, flash, fast

What she doesn't know

is that they are calling the name of another

not hers.

 

She poses

Her face coated in

fluorescent warpaint.

If any adversary dare break this

Utopia

prepare to have every muscle ravaged

every bone shattered

every magazine aware.

 

She waits

When will they decide

that the woman they are really after

is not worth their time?

Not to mention that her

Significant Other

is the definition of deceit?

She should know

She is the other woman.

 

She ponders

for once in spiteful

shallow existance

what is she doing

sponging off this real beauty

when being young and pretty

is all that you need

to be like her

And less.

Author's Note

Constructive criticism please!
Sorry if it's really awful, it's my first poem!
Many thanks.

Reviews

[Kimberly]

It's not awful. LoL. Actually, it very good. I'm not much of a poet so I can't give you much criticism. All I can say is that I liked this poem and thought it was an insightful look on the internal lives of our celebrities and, by extension, our own feelings of having to put on a mask and perform for our loved ones and society and creating a separate self to deal with others.

I especially like that you describe make-up as 'fluorescent warpaint'.

[Seerose]

Hey! Welcome. I am new here, too. I like your poem. People don't know each other and even sometimes don't know themselves but they think they have the right to judge everyone. Very good.