You're Dead To Me

I follow you,

Yes I do,

Through it all,

You play it out so well,

Thinking you’re perfect,

Yet the day has come,

To prove how you aren’t,

Stumbling,

Whimpering,

Wishing someone would hear your calls,

Thing is I do,

Just this time around,

I’m not helping you up,

Suffer I say,

Suffer the way I did,

Maybe you’ll learn something,

Horrid thing is,

You made your way up for now,

Now you’re perfect again,

Until you feel a push,

Whoops,

My bad,

You’re down in the dirt,

Crying out loud,

Wishing you could get up,

With a foot cough in a trap,

Ropes coming from all places,

Tying you upside down,

Let this be a blood rush,

Cutting and slicing away,

Limb after limb,

Into box after box,

Shovel digging in the Earth,

Tossing the boxes in the hole of life,

Covering them up with dirt and worms,

Now all that’s left of you,

Is your small heart,

Inside a jar,

For a reminder,

That you’re dead to me, 

Reviews

[Dr. Wood ?]

wow! you certainly went for the jugular here my girl. I can only say that for the genre it represents this is, in my opinion very startling...I sense a lot of anger...Ooh, I am beginning to sound like a real doctor....Your style is your own and from what I have read up here, quite unique....You know that I am a humour man...the other side of your coin....But this is very powerful and I bet you felt good when you completed it.

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks! Ahh, I sure did feel a bit better, not much. Ehh, yeah there's anger.. ^_^

[Dr. Wood ?]

a little anger is a good thing...if channeled correctly

[Serena Kaye]

Very true.

[Ama May Cooper]

*caught

Very angry, saddistic , cruel
Brilliant mind you , i love teh way your characters gentle compassion has become twisted and bitter, almost like your protagonist becomes a torturer because of her own torture.
Lovely to read.

[Serena Kaye]

Heh, weell, I tend to be that way, oops..
Thanks!

[Rhea752]

wow. that was powerful and brimming with resentment. i feel bad for whoever your angry at. great poem. Keep it up!!!!!!!

[Serena Kaye]

No need to..(;
Thanks!

[Laura]

This is Brutal ;) Glad you let it all out

[Serena Kaye]

Hehe, thanks.

[Helen Crutchett]

Ah yes, there is anger, that's for sure....a lot of it! A stream of consciousness vent and you vented oh so well. My imagination took quite a ride reading this. Good work!

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks..

[ewest1220]

Phew! That one took me by surprise :o Loved it!

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks!

[DA]

That was intense! I can relate to this angry flow of words. Excellent poem! Well done :)

[Serena Kaye]

Thank you! ^-^

[Tai Ryens]

You certainly did not refrain raw emotions.
Cutting and slicing away limb after limb ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
I am very strange, humming these two lines as a tune for a song. Ehehe, I like this.

[Serena Kaye]

I did the same after I read it a few times. xD It was very amusing. Sad thing was I was playing with a knife while I was..Oops..
Thanks!^-^

[TheJordBaker]

very powerful, you certainly let it all out! a really great poem :)

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks!

[Admiral Kirk]

Wow. Very dark and deep, very powerful. Great job! I can feel anger, confusion, and thirst for revenge coming through in this poem. And in the end, it seems that the person is being pushed away by the author of this poem, perhaps for being cocky and over confident? Great poem.

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks! And yes, anger, and revenge.. Whoops. Hehe..

[Admiral Kirk]

:D