A Personal Stalker

I share my account of dealing with a stalker on a personal level. This can fall into horror but it's also a biography & memoir type read too. This is a true story but listed in horror.

 

No one will ever believe me about this, but it went on for the last year -- how a man named John Alexander who also goes by the alias of Federick Back. I will not name the community he terrorized via snail mail, and refused to do a return address. I knew it was him because it had the MO from a year ago, where he was trying to convince the community I was a child predator in some way, shape or form. This person is a regular of a message board called SomethingAwful.com and is fast friends with a Chicago based DJ in Chicago who has an open hatred for me.
      Some of the things this person had done I have to say are downright creepy in terms of how far he’d go to stalk me and what not. The whole thing about him posing as my blood relatives a year ago still has this thing which scares me a bit, how he’d be so willing to do that --- just to see who’d he be able to break at will, but in truth the little bully from Vaasa, Finland, doesn’t have the courage to do a return address then uses bits and pieces of things I’ve said online and made half-truths out of them.
      “We will break him,” is something I seen written of one of his posts back in 2008.
      He did this reign of terror for quite some time, but it was hard to pin point exactly the motif of why he started to pull what he pulled.
      I’ve seen some of the things he’s done over the years, posting my family’s unlisted phone number and address up on his blog site. The person terrorized my family’s community for a good part of a year and in the recent events, it forced my hand in searching for a new apartment in the city -- all the lies he posted in the pages became a living nightmare I can’t begin to fathom. All the things he’s done, are the things I am only accused of doing.
      The whole thing about him making claims that I am some kind of child molester that would touch children in ways that they shouldn’t be touched even unnerved me because I will never lay a hand on a child in such a way.
      I saw the envelope and knew it was from Finland, and sometimes I have to ask what the laws were like in Finland about stalkers -- if he lived in Illinois, he’d be looking at prison time.
      “There is no law against sending a letter,” one of his friends would say in an e-mail to me.
      There is something against the law for a letter like what he did because it was nothing short of slander and defamation of character. I sometimes can’t go out of the house without getting a dirty look here and there, normally I got them without his help. The village played right off their fears of what they didn’t understand. The claims that I was some kind of Catch a Predator reject is the thing that I will not really get over, especially since I had a death in the family. None of the names are mentioned in this, though I will say that Federick Back aka John Alexander has a psychological profile some can’t begin to imagine -- the classic bully is the way I word it.
      The personal stalker writers one year ago, “You’re mine, I own you now and forever.”
      One of his other co-horts posted something on a social networking profile -- on the anniversary of when I got stabbed, five screwdrivers. What I relate here is far creepier than anything I can imagine, and making the claims I am not under doctor’s care. The doctor’s can’t reveal such information to the public because of their code of silence they take, meaning they can’t make anything public unless I signed the papers to allow it. It was one of those things that one would force a person completely into hiding, after the fact one of their friends impersonated two people. They would be responsible for all those blogs and fake listings -- trying to convince the world that I was some kind of flamer or f****t, when I am not like that at all.
      The one said on the phone, “I will stop only when you have a nervous breakdown and locked away at St. Joe’s for an indefinite time.”
      Makes one wonder if he pushed people around in Vaasa, Finland, when he was in his twenties or in his teens because in high school he would have been a senior when I was a freshmen. I dealt with this personal stalker for a good number of years to this date, but doubt he would be brought to justice. I e-mailed the Finland post office asking them if they had any information about a suspicious figure from Vaasa sending a huge stack of envelopes out that had about $45 worth of stamps on each one -- who the hell has that kind of cash to pay for stamps?
      “Seems like my personal stalker is really obsessed with breaking me,” I found myself saying as I was looking at all the photographs of the envelopes, he went as far as going to a community message board I don’t even know about..
      I notified the police about the fliers that were being passed around, and one of the writers who were out to try to see if they can do what they can to make me a footnote in the industry contributed to this as well. In terms of sending me the photos of this sick plan; A dark picture of paranoia becomes the thing that comes to mind when the police pulled the community together pointing out the fliers being unfounded.
      “The reason I am bringing all of you together tonight is because I’ve seen these fliers going around,” the one officer said as he was pointing them out. The thing that gave me the chills about the thing is his son actually got one of these too.
      “Do you have any of the envelopes, I knew where they originated from,” I said to some around me. There will be no names mentioned or the community be mentioned either because this can happen in any town or any community. A paranoia compared to the piece that Rod Serling wrote called The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street.
      I saw those fliers for myself and called my doctor because I said it was an emergency appointment, she mentioned she got one of them too and she fed the thing to Mr. P. Shredder. John aka Federick wanted to see me get tar and feathered in a community, but they don’t do that anymore -- just that it will be hard to recover from something of this nature. No man deserves something like that done to them in their back yard.
      “Damn it,” I said to myself as I saw those fliers.
      I blogged of this just before going black for a little more than a week, but I am avoiding particular message boards and some web logs; just that there is so much chatter that goes around social networking sites at times. Some people can’t wean the lie from the truth, because somewhere between the two there is the actual truth.
      What kind of b*****d would pull something like this? I thought to myself looking at the flier photographs, and I was doing the final touches to the book called Dirty Pool -- this sort of thing was considered dirty pool because of the things a person would do. How far would they go to ruin someone or attempt to do so.
      One thing I wrote in this same blog a few years back, “People will talk.” I learned now is this -- let them talk, but when it comes to someone like the one from Finland, that is a nightmare within itself because he is the one that will terrorize someone for many years to come. Much like Sherrod DeGrippo a few years earlier when she drove someone into committing suicide and picking a fight with Henry Rollins. Among these varied things, and if one was to make a psychological profile of my personal stalker -- it would be the thing that captures the imagination about John Alexander or Federick Back in terms of how far some would go to libel someone in different levels. As in both on a personal and a professional level. Such stalking from an international seems obscure, it comes to being an obsession with someone as this -- being I was stalked by two internationals.
      It rang true in my mind that one was that obsessive, “You are ours, now and forever -- making sure we stick you back in the cage where you belong.”
      It’s up for speculation from the community of the questions in that one meeting, namely because I don’t know any of the details of that meeting. I just wish there was some way to press charges via e-mail about him, or find someone who’d be willing to listen from an outsider’s point of view. When I saw that one in the mail back in the summer of 2010, it drove me to purchase my post office box -- a horror in my eyes of knowing that someone was trailing me like some hunted animal but in truth the hunt he was composing was canned.
      “Is there anyone listening?”
      “Will anyone believe me about this prick?”
      I sometimes would say when I do the videos exposing some of them, knowing that they were too much carried with a yellow stripe upon their backs to tell the truth. Everyone that this person victimized by doing the flier, will not be named in this -- or will be named for that matter, but I just want to bring to light what kind of hell someone can unleash with one little flier when they pass off malicious poisoned words off as truth.
      I would go out barely around the community, namely because of these damned fliers though I will not hide like a coward like him. Some like him really like to get someone damaged, and will not rest until someone is completely destroyed -- that is how a personal stalker works at times, and keep hearing those damned horror stories about how some celebrities end up getting a bullet from a crazed fan. This person is one of those coined as an anti-fan. The person would go out of his way to do those damned deals where they would pass me off as someone who lost it all; when I haven’t lost a thing. What he does are the things he hasn’t got caught for yet, but they will catch him where he begins to slip up for something or other; when he does something wicked.
      “I don’t care for the consequences, just want to make sure he never gets noticed in a positive light or people know he still has the publications” would be something he might be saying as he hides behind the screen -- knowing he would actually spend the money from a company he abuses. Turns out he is an employee of Netfirms.con. I have to think about the consequences that some like him will have, but I was taught how to respond instead of react -- thinking of this from a perspective some might not understand now but if they see this years from now it might make sense to them in some way.
      I have to ask myself this when I look at the stalkers picture, namely because if his mother was dead -- he made the b***h cry with the things he’d do or try to do. Where the confession of how he is stalking me, vowing that I will be locked in a cage saying I will never harm a person again -- making the sick claims along with the one who calls himself “Killhamster” would go around doing the same thing almost eight years ago repeatedly.
      I will not let him make me live like a damn fugitive, but I will say this from the rooftops -- I will not let someone like him intimidate me by using a whole community to invoke fear and hatred; passing me off as someone Chris Hansen would interview on MSNBC. I wonder what might happen if Chris Hansen would do a piece about cyber bullies and get this guy’s address in Vaasa, and I do have this information too -- but I am not like the loser who goes posting my families information everywhere without our permission. Where the whole thing that this person had done; the whole nightmare he invoked becomes the thing talked about for years to come within a small community -- of how he collected addresses from the community but doesn’t put their name on addresses. If that doesn’t sound like something a stalker would pull, then I really don’t want to know what is the work of a stalker.
      Such hatred for one person they never met or will meet is something that I find a little unnerving but in the age of face book and other websites similar to this, it became more common with the interaction face to face had long been taken away. Leaving the doors wide open for one such stalker to enter the walls of one’s computer screen, and the person’s back yard with the malicious fliers going around.
      “You are not going to be on me -- ever, you have no control over me.”
      That is the response I will have of the one as I brought this narrative in closing that others will have the similar horror story to tell, and things from other people who have similar narratives they can relate of their stalkers and bullies. The one thing that John Alexander or Federick Back is looking for is someone to be afraid of them and what they can do -- well when one is educated and comes in responding instead of reacting, the darker picture seen here is the one where the truth shall be told, and the truth is what’s written in stone. Fear is something he thrives on but it will not be the result he would get; the only thing that will be the judge of this -- and there is only one man who’d be doing this, and it is in Him when it end all ends of life.

Author's Note

I posted it here because I want people to know that some who no matter where they're at in the industry or in life, there are always going to be people who stalk and harass on different levels. This person harassed me on a personal and professional level, invaded my privacy and all the things in between.

Reviews

[Kevin Horsley]

It beggars belief that anyone would want to do this, it's almost single white female online.