Warped Intuitions

In my mind, nothing goes unfinished

Except for everything I ever start

God, how I wish sometimes my impulsive control would diminish

And I could free myself to this world

A no-limitations menace,

Perpetuating pride, peace, and prosperity,

And pushing the decadent-downfall of penis envy

Making all the females of the world scream

“Holy F*****g S**t, This Vagina B***h ‘Dun Set Me Free”

And I’d be like

“You Best Believe I Did And So Did All These Women Before Me”

Because you see

I believe we’re all stuck here for a reason

We were supposed to get raped, romped, and become rehab singers

And karma doesn’t have s**t to do with it, so

Get off of Eve’s back

And look at the man who let her soak in his semen

I mean

She had to be one fine Sheila

To get this man to choose living

Over eternal freedom

Not caring that his kids would someday say

“Oh Dear God Praise My Father Who Arte In Hell”

And what about Jesus and his suicide

Just to give us back this eternal sunshine

All the time knowing men would use his name as a battle cry

Mothers would weep over husbands who were f*****g preachers

Boys would be molested by his celibate believers

And those who became gender “diseased” would be persecuted,

His name being the one thing restraining us from ever being

Birds in a sea of clouds

Floating by the seeds of million year old fiends,

We would only having the chance

To swim in suicide pools of prohibition peacefully

As long as we did not disturb the mating patterns

Of the pools annual ripples that opened the rivers to the sea of inhibition

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

bit of spoken wizzord


that i did
when
i was starting out

and stuff

um yeah

first thing i ever recorded

any ideas for format to make it easier to read line breaks and such let me know

Reviews

[Raef C. Boylan]

I f*cking wanna hear it
a lot
'cos yeah
this baby is born to be performed
especially the dialogue-y bits

must be summat in the air 'cos
as much as i hate my voice
i was pissing about with my [cell] phone
the other day, recording a coupla pieces
only to be heard by others if i'm dead, y'get me
'cos the radio last week proved i'm no orator

if anyone nicks my phone
they will be haunted

and will have relieved me of a tracking device


gotta back emily burns up re:
"We would only having the chance"
[only be having]
[only have?]
[We only having?]

pretty much every line/couplet
either amused me or got the ol' grey matter a tick-tocking
no wait wrong organ
a tink-thinking
haha
it was kinda 'what's L E getting at there?'
and then i'd explore my head
see if i agreed or found it funny
makes me sound a bit slooo-oo-oow
but it all happens in the space of a few seconds
that's omnipotence for you
and maybe explains the impotence
'cos what's the point
when time is not short
for it to be short
must be 'cos i'm irish
yup yup yup

"And what about Jesus and his suicide"
- imagination ran wild
like wh00sh through fields of opium

the attitude
and the humour
and the rhythm/beat
and the intelligence
'make' this piece

the cynical examination of feminism is great
and a demonstration of the above

thanks for sharing this one

yo

[Emily B]

One little bitty thing:

We would only having the chance

To swim in suicide pools of prohibition peacefully

Something about it doesn't seem to flow with everything else.

One awesome write!

[Engulfed in Flames]

daaaaaaamn...that was awesome.

I love every word of it, I also enjoyed the alliteration.