Fish of Meh

Diving off the wooden board

Into a milky swamp of a river,

Exfoliating months and months

Of stress erosion

And splinters from my feet,

 

I fell Deep down underneath

Where I met a sea of swimming

Pumpkin carriage eaters

Eating their way through

Another box of Ever After Pie.

 

When this one swam up beside me and

Put her little silver fin 

Across my thigh and said,

“Hey sister I got a blister rubbing

Against the inside of my eye.”

 

Silly of her to think that

I could ever be her sister.

Swimming up and rubbing across

My thigh.

 

“I think that I could pop it if

I was given a finger or something pointy

To jab in the side.”

 

She starts winking at me

Desperately with her one working eye.

 

“Give me a wiggle, a punch, a jab.

Help me fix my eye.”

 

I struggled to look at her seriously;

My conscious struggling over desire.

 

She opens her lips again.

"You’re a dumbass."

It’s a judgment she makes

Solely over my inability

To simply poke a strange fish in the

Eyeeeeeeee.

So I say

"I like asses. Especially dumb ones"

Then little fish says

"Lick mine"

I would have done it but
fish asses
do not look like human asses

And I didn’t know where to lick.

 

But the blister was still bulging

so

 

I tighten my fist inside my

Palm; ready to knock this

Fishy out but then I remember

It was time for me to breathe.

 

I open up my tight

Pinched mouth letting the

Carbon release and the ocean

Deplete me.

 

Passing out. Drowsy.

The son has too many obstacles.

Time now for me to come see

What the sea of fish has

Done to me.

 

Closing my eyes to the world

Opening them in a blink.

 

I look up to see what’s

Different now and it’s everything

But the little fish

Who claimed me is a little closer than

I think.

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[lostintheworld]

i look up to see who's different here
the latest me or the latest you...

manhole. knuckledown. ani.

it echoes when i read. I'll tell you why throughout....

so
i think
it's about the fish in the sea at the bottom of a manhole
and insecurities that suffocate in that manhole

we both know you dived into a milky swamp.
and you are constantly questioning how one could choose YOU.

help me fix my eye is like saying
help me see what i've been needing/wanting all of my life...

conscious struggling over desire-- this is you channeling ani... integrity finally won over desire ( i wrote it on your notebook that day... haha did you know that?)

you're inability to poke a strange fish in the eye- this is you questioning taking a risk ( with a fish in the sea)

dumbass. hmmm. yeah. i've called you that before oddly.
and somehow
meanings of your poems
can always double
and
somehow be
about us.
ha

i'm not feeling the asslicking part. i just cant make it work in the context of the poem as a whole. just my opinion...

the bulging blister
well, yeah
thats the
secrets.lies that were growing
itching to be revealed
and to you it was like preparing for a punch
cause you thought you knew how it'd end
and you thought it'd knock
me out (i'm so selfish, it's always about me.. ha. )


the sea of fish- yeah society, what they've done to make you feel the way you have felt.. the need for the secrets... lies...


so then my fave:
I look up to see what's
Different now and it's everything
But the little fish
Who claimed me is a little closer than
I think.

one- this channels ani, as stated in the first few lines of the review... manhole. which is an appropriate allusion here. Cause it is about the manhole of memories.

see you thought "popping the blister" would have the effect of you opening your eyes and being alone... cept the fish who claimed you
is closer
than you thought.


so i leave you with this

i kissed you on the street that night
on the far side of four
but i didn't like the taste
in my mouth or yours
and ignoring the persona you wore for my benefit
for once i had the balls to call it
just call it
but a lesson must be lived
in order to be learned
and the clarity to see and stop this now
that is what i've earned

i see it as saying twas a lesson learned. and a trust earned. and a f*****g blinking neon sign

that says
"dumbass
she loves you"


lol

[Vanessa Whiteley]

This makes for an engrossing read. Your free verse is really unusual with Surreal imagery and yet the flow is well controlled. Good poem.

[Raef C. Boylan]

'tis a good picture
glad you came back

the last few stanzas are some of the best
aren't they?

good rhyming and rhythm throughout

is there significance
in the lowercases of:

"I would have done it but
fish asses
do not look like human asses
And I didn't know where to lick.

But the blister was still bulging
so"

'cos the rest of it is capitalised?

sisters
and
confusion
and fishies [guilt?]
lead to drowning

"Where I met a sea of swimming
Pumpkin carriage eaters" - like this image, even though I don't understand it...time?...loss of innocence?...do fish eat pumpkins?

"I tighten my fist inside my
Palm; ready to knock this
Fishy out but then I remember
It was time for me to breathe." - this works and i like it but there's a grammatical error somewhere and it probably doesn't even need fixing but I'm gonna tell you cos i'm a dumbass [so like me d****t!]
"tighten"..."remember" = present tense - - - "was" = past tense
but it does work fine
just checking that it's deliberate

- - - blindness of sisters - - -

maybe i'm making too much of a percieved theme?

Anyway, good piece. I enjoyed it.
Some places read better than others but together they make a w.hole.
Burrow in, y'all.