I was blind

‘I was blind, but now I can see.’

You open up my senses one. By. one.

I can feel…

Feel you, every part of you.

The sweat in the air, your love as it shudders through me and your hands touching every inch of my body.

I want it. I yearn for it.

I want you.

I taste your breath and it’s like my own

I’m no longer one, but half of what used to remain.

Only feeling alive in your presence

I can only see in your presence,

Can only perceive in your presence,

Can only taste in your presence

And when I hear your soft groans, I am at peace.

Is this the love I've been looking for?

No. It’s much more intense.

You are the shining knight who has woken me from my slumber

And you rescued me from the burning tower ignited from my own passionate desire.

Taming the beast that was myself.

You make me feel weak yet powerful.

One touch to send me to my knees.

You are the poison that killed Romeo, the radiation that ended Mrs Curie.

You are me

And I, you.

Reviews

[Arthur Aadams]

Nice poem, i do have some notes though:

Since it's a rather erotic poem the line ''One touch to send me to my knees.'' is a little ambiguous, not sure if this was what you meant to do.

This is nice: ''You are the poison that killed Romeo, the radiation that ended Mrs Curie.'' But i don't really find it fitting in the poem, correct me if i got it wrong though.
Romeo and Mrs Curie both died of ignorance (curie didnt know you could get cancer from uranium, romeo didn't know juliet faked her death and commited suicide), so are you suggesting that ''he'' is a tragic addition to your passion? One you are ignorant about and that will end you? I hope you see where I'm coming from though!

[Tyrean_m]

Yes I totally see where you are coming from. The end of the poem is based upon the idea that all great love built on passion (well historically) ends in tragedy because we are so blinded by that special person. Romeo didn't know Juliet was still alive but the idea of being parted from her was too much for him to bare, to the point where he took his own life. Pierre and Marie were also star crossed lovers who worked and lived together willing to spend most of their time together because of their infatuation for one another and were separated by their fatal discovery of uranium. It hurts to love deeply but its the best type of love out there.

[Arthur Aadams]

''It hurts to love deeply but its the best type of love out there.'' very true words, i get you now, absolutely love the poem! (pierre and marie were lovers? I though they were brother and sister)

[Richard🖌]

I find it most amazing that an 18-year-old woman has such maturity in her mind, heart, and soul that enables her to compose a beautifully-romantic, sensual interlude of poetry.
There are some formatting issues with lines lengths, and if that is all, we're looking at virtual perfection in emotional expression, tender touches, spiritual blending between lovers, and the ability to honestly, openly, confidently, and comfortably reveal your core to the world … traits that a more mature person would normally have difficulty doing; yet, you seem to have flowed out and are seen dancing vibrantly upon the page.

Marvelous, Tyrean, I am completely swept-up in your moment … thank you warmly and sincerely! ⁓ Richard

[Tyrean_m]

Thank you so much for this Richard. I am so grateful that you feel this way about this poem. As it means a lot to me. Thank you for taking the time to read it.

[Coyote Poetry]

Amazing use of words.
"One touch to send me to my knees.
You are the poison that killed Romeo, the radiation that ended Mrs Curie.
You are me
And I, you."
Above lines. Perfect. Left the reader with a lot to think about.Thank you for sharing the the outstanding poetry.
Coyote