Betrayal

About Nature =)

Tall gods on our land,

manipulating the rock at our command.

Protecting us from the mother's harsh ways,

Stopping her from ruining our days,

Controlling her anger for our pleasure.

Stripping the mother from her weapons,

and giving us a sight from the heavens.

The tall gods laugh with glee,

as mother will vanish, luckily

One day, something terrible happened,

the gods had apparently simply maddened.

Tall devils on our land,

corrupting the rock at their hand.

Stealing us from our mother's fair ways,

Stopping her from saving our days,

Destroying herself and our pleasure.

Stripping our mother from her weapons,

Therefore forbidding us from the heavens.

The tall devils laugh with glee,

as mother will vanish, unfortunately

Now, we weep as we try to save our mother,

We will do our best, as there is no other.

Author's Note

I tried to make the message a bit hidden, but not too hidden. the picture might give the poem away though.

Reviews

[Jessica Mai]

I really like this. I had to read it twice though and the second time i really understood and loved it! Keep it up

[Marie Harrison]

What an incredible poem Ryan. Symbolism fills this poem from the beginning to the end. I enjoyed the over all message of betrayal. The childlike voice in the poem. The twist of view of the Mother and the Gods. It's an amazing poem.

[Michael X]

this reminds me of ancient times, it could be because the feelings invoke a
sense of power and the Gods, this has a great sense of the nature, awsome job

[Devons]

This poem is chiselled out like a man-made structure from natural stone. That is, reflecting the ignorance man harbours towards his natural surroundings; taking for granted mindlessly the gift of land from earth upon which he presumes to build. The sentiment and message is clear. Although the 'tall gods' can obviously be construed as 'skyscrapers' (which in themselves represent man's triumph over nature, for one thing) but also the phrase can be interpreted as Man himself - a god, standing tall and proud, and many..
But i may add a codicil to this statement: Man cannot go on forever - nature CAN. What happens to these monuments to man's creation without the attendance of Man himself? Mother nature will gradually and eventually reclaim her territory; the weeds appearing, the vultures attending, green returning, animals inhabiting - and one day these man-made structures will merely be rocks; to be discovered again perhaps one day by a future race.. and hewn once more into modern buildings...
The cycle goes on - with or without man.
An important poem, putting its message across bluntly and well. Clearly making one think...

PS a couple of small errors - you may want to check it over again.

[Ryan Falzon - Tymon]

@Annette Jay Sweeney Actually no, I haven't lol. I watched it but it was at release, it wasn't on my mind at all =).

[Annette Jay Sweeney]

I agree that the image definitely helped to give away the content. Have you been watching Avatar recently? haha I had similar thoughts after the movies. You really do give a unique spin on this through . I like the repetition and the form you use.

Poems often need a shift, a place where they take off. You do this by changing the view on what the "tall devils" are doing from the beginning to the end. This is a successful work. :)