For fucksake Dad.

The f**k are you doing. I can't explain it. I'm so angry, but I feel like crying. Or cutting. You're a real prick sometimes.

What the f**k?

Were you planning on telling me?

How long have you been secretly seeing this woman?

A is really nice. She buys me great presents for my birthday and Christmas while you have no input in them. I could have finally had my life dream of going to America, but now I wont have any link to someone who goes on a yearly basis. You have 4 cats and you always act like they're your babies, but now your abandoning them to go to f*****g Wales. If you can detach yourself emotionally from your precious cats, then it's obvious how little you care for me. Seriously Dad, what the f**k?

How can this woman already be telling you that she's cool with your kids visiting? It's not like we'd ever visit you. You never, NEVER, willingly come to see me so why would I waist a whole day to see you in Wales with your new f*****g Mrs and her kid? I'm so angry. You've abandoned me so many times and I've always stuck by you. I always defend you when people talk s**t about you. Now you're going to be over 200 miles instead of 18. You only visit for my birthday and Christmas with presents you had no influence in buying. And I'm not important enough to you for a 6 hour round journey just to drop of presents that you probably got your new woman to buy for me. I'm so mad. F**k you. Just f**k you.

Where's the Dad I thought I had? The Dad who was thoughtful and helpful and caring and always wants to support me. Did he even actually exist?

I wonder if you'll take the 'Best Dad Ever' mug I painted for you years ago for fathers day.

I’m sure you still have it, you made sure you showed me on one of the last times I came over, maybe a year or so ago. I doubt you still have it and for the first time in the 8 years after you left this house, I doubt that you love me or even care about me.