Growing up

A simple journal entry about my realization that I really am growing up fast

Just a few more months, weeks, days

I'll be seventeen before I know it

And I can’t help but only feel fear

It’s only a matter of time before I’m on my own

Will I survive?

Will I figure out my future?

Will I have a good life?

Will I ever find someone to spend the rest of my life with?

I can’t help stressing about everything

Growing up is terrifying and stressful

Maybe things will work themselves out

I miss it

I miss being a kid, not having a care in the world

Except getting up early to catch my favorite show

I miss believing in the tooth fairy and Santa Clause

I miss the simple little things that put a little magic in my childhood

I’d give anything just to go back

Despite trauma, I still miss my childhood deeply

But it’s almost all over now

I can’t help but hope that I can give my kids a magical childhood

Without the things that I went through

But it’ll end all the same

Because I’ll be crying when they start growing up

An ongoing cycle of life, that you can’t slow

But I try to take advantage of this time

Before it all runs out