My Conspiracy

I just want you to know.

I don't want to be here nor there, but a spirit to exist in.

[The things we've already seen, repeated history as a statistic. So what's more to do?]

If there is a beyond among the being, leave me be to rot.

For my decomposing is foul and abusive, yet I know I'll be radiant with smothering scents of beauty in soul.

When you smell the horrific sights of my lifeless life, smile with joy.

For my burdens and sins are finally lifting from the coffin I've lived in.

Sniff the negative energy inside that I hid to protect the aura of the living, as a reminder that has finally been released with grief that no longer haunts me.

Never do I regret to inform you that you will never see me again, but regret in the disappointment in seeing my smile as a secret.

A secret that I refuse to tell with no guilt.

Have no fear, I'll be there every step of the way.

But tell no one.

They will never understand what they don't see,

And I am simply not there.