Unrequited (Foolish Heart Story)

The story of that started it all

It was a cool Sunday afternoon on December 13, 2008. I was standing on top of a hill overlooking a glistening lake in Round Hill, Virginia. A cool breeze swept over the blades of grass and into my face. I stand there waiting and thinking about the last few days. I turn around and start walking to meet up with my girlfriend Jessica and meet her family for the first time. Nervous uneasiness slithers down my chest, unknowing of what would happen. I saw her, a cute Filipina girl standing on the porch of the house with another girl who I later found out to be her cousin Olivia. She gave me a warm hug and reminded me of the reasons why I liked her so much. I reached out and held her hand as we walked around her neighborhood. As we came upon a playground, we sat down and just talked about anything and everything we can think of. Our words and conversations flowed like water to a stream, calm and refreshing. Soon we leaned toward each other and shared our first kiss and it felt amazing, butterflies turned into doves and I felt like I was in heaven.

            Later, we went back to her house so I can meet her parents and family for the first time. I walked in as a nervous wreck and entered the kitchen and saw her mom. I introduced myself as Brian and the Redskins game was on TV. I sat down and I met her sister Amanda and brother Jonathan. We had a good conversation as I told them about me. I felt comfortable now, feeling no tension in the air, or maybe it was just the easiness of Redskins fans enjoying a good game of football. We then decided to go to the outlet mall in Leesburg and I felt like it was a good opportunity to bond and get to know the family even more. We went around to the outlet going to different stores like Nike. While her family was inside shopping for shoes, I took her outside and we sat under the starlit night sky. As we talked, knowing about her rough heartbroken past; I promised her that I was not like the other guys and that I would never hurt her and most of all I would never let her go as long as she doesn’t let go of me. She gave me a hug and I held her tight knowing that I might fall for this girl and she might be the one for me. We shared a romantic moment under the night sky woven by the lights of the distant stars.

            Over the next month, we saw each other in spaced out time periods due to her living in Round Hill and me living in Lansdowne. Every now and then I visited her, usually every Friday or sometimes on weekends. Even though we were distanced, I was happy and content without relationship. Though we may not have seen other as often, I treasured every moment I did see her. It was easy and smooth for the moment.

            Sometime in January, I got called into Deputy Fowler’s office during school; he told me something had happened over at Valley which is her high school. She was in a lot of trouble, and after getting my name cleared; I went straight into trying to help solve the problem. Over the next few weeks, the drama died down in the school. However, she was struggling at home with her family especially with her dads trust. So the next day, I planned a little surprise for her to try and get her to feel a bit better. I talked to her sister and convinced her to buy her a talking rose and put it on her bed. Once I got out of school, I rushed to her house and arrived when she got home. She then saw the rose on her bed, a smile grew on her face, she ran outside to me and wrapped me in her arms. After an hour, I had to go home and I found out later that her dad made her feel horrible, so I called her sister and told her to come by my house, I gave her a letter to Jessica and a bouquet of roses. She gave it to Jessica and I made her day a little better again. I breathed a sigh of relief, and waited for her to go to sleep on the phone before turning in myself.

            The next month, she got into a problem again and this time sent me through a whole month of worry, stress and confusion. I spent long hours at night thinking of what I should do and over time I decided if worse comes to worse; I will accept the responsibility of her actions and try to survive through it. When I was breaking down, I kept that promise I made to her that night and I prevented her myself from shattering. One day, she needed me so once again I rushed to her side this time not having a way home. We hung out at a shopping center 8 miles from her house. She had to go home at 8, and it started to rain heavily. I could not find a ride home, so I chose that if I am going to be homeless in the rain for one night then I want to be near her. So I walked the eight miles back to her house at around 11 o’clock at night. I sat in the rain for 2 hours before finally getting a friend to pick me up. Luckily her actions did not have long, deep consequences and we were able to move on without relationship even though my trust was severely broken and damaged.

            After this incident, my friends were sternly against her and disliked her for her actions. I defended her and our relationship, ignoring my friends who were telling me that she was not worth my time and effort. On the other hand, her friends are telling her that I was too far from her and she needed someone closer, and that she deserved better. I was exhausted at this time, and I was fighting my own friends so that she and I could stay together. One day, she told me her friends were right and wanted to take a little break to think about the pros and cons of  being with me. I was starting to break up on the inside.

            Over the next few weeks, we had a dysfunctional on and off relationship breaking up and getting back together. I was getting frustrated feeling that I am making an effort to stand up for her against my friends and she was not matching my efforts. Then one night she said “I need a break” and I said “oh okay.’ She said “I love you and that I promise I will be back with you soon.” I just plainly replied “sure.” The very next day, I got out of school and I was playing a good game of basketball with my friends, she texted me and told me she met somebody in town. I asked her if she was going to date him and she said maybe. That part of me was now torn and when I went home and saw that she was already in a relationship with him, I felt myself shatter into pieces.

            I sunk into a deep depression, feeling so heartbroken. One day we were talking and we got into an argument and she told me “You changed; you handled our break up the wrong way. You are a waste of time just like our relationship was.” Like a mirror, shattered into dust flowing into the wind and cutting in people’s heart and ending their heartbeat, I broke into pieces.

            Now once again I stand on the very same hill, the wind blowing over the now grown grass. I reminisced about the past 14 hard months; the four months of happiness and the 10 months of depression. The hard lessons, learned and the joy felt with every hug and kiss. She broke every single one of my expectations I had for myself, I surprised myself every time. I had to push myself every time I felt like breaking and holding myself together. She taught me how to break my limits and go beyond the sky and through the clouds. Standing on the hill, a renewed soul a rebuilt person feeling so free like the breeze going through my hair; my friends say I have changed beyond their recognition, they say that I lived through it and grown stronger even though the damage was severe. Yet I took her words, and I used them to prove to myself that I can grow stronger to change so that the next girl will have the best I can give her. Now I am no longer the teenager with high dreams, I am not the teenager whose dreams are about to be realized. The sunset with a bright array of colors represent the moment in my life; the shining beauty and the tinge of darkness represent the closing of this chapter to my life. Yet I know the sun rises tomorrow and I will wake up knowing that life is just beginning. I look back one last time with tears in my eyes, wave my hand to say goodbye. As I turn around the sunset shines as the smile on my face grow, and down the hill a smile glows back at me. She waved hi, and I ran down took her hand and walked into the distance. In the next 17 months and counting my smile has remained strong.

Reviews

[SamBug]

This story was just amazing. I'm speechless right now. Like you didn't do anything wrong here. Detail was perfect. Characters. Plot. Everything. I'm just...there are no words to describe how stunned and jealous I am right now about how well of a writer you really are. Like seriously!!! I'm so impressed.

[Joshua Donahue]

I am breathless after reading this piece. The way you described some of the details was absolutely amazing. The plot of the story was so heartfelt. I actually felt as if I was the main character guy. I am, after all, going through a VERY VERY similar situation at the moment, and reading pieces like these connect me with that problem even more. The words you put into this was amazing, and the ending was beautiful, nothing less. At first, I felt that the way you jumped scenes was so random, because they weren't really connected. The character would be at her house in one line, and then two liens later, he was somewhere else. I am not sure how the scene-jumping worked for the story, but I see that the length of the story was not your purpose now. The plot, the emotion, and the love was your purpose. Truly inspiring! :)