tilting (a kinder aversion)

"the force that drives the water through the rocks
drives my red blood; that dries the mouthing streams
turns mine to wax.."

                                                                                - dylan thomas

...i skim the mud from the left tread 

while i curse the azimuth of the right.

one lights the way without grudge, 

whilst the other entices with an endless sequence of blind turns.

glassless glances and cursing courses 

like a blood clot in a stump 

that can hardly right the tilting shoulders;

burdened with a needle that's been spurned by the dial 

and teeters it's sight lines somewhere aft of the totters.

i take a breath and let the shallow rift 

flow through the slot with all the purpose 

of a hilted shiv serenading a good god damn to stealth 

with its hearty "yip" and "yawp!" 

the soil toils in a garden womb 

where seeds get planted complete with chiseled markers 

while the yoke splinters and bristles the inclinations 

that "would not's" and "could not's" are mere illusions 

to parlay for an extra ration of a sleep 

roiling irreverently irrelevant to peace.

my closed eye sees, just as it will, 

what darkness scars upon the wound

and imprisons the poisons to supplement the blood 

it deigned to pool in the shape of a heart.

and i dream of a kinder aversion 

to trod down that path and rustle the worm-sheltering leaves 

that i might render aloud what it is 

to quench that parched gullet with three fingers of chemo 

and set back to the muddy trim, 

wandering and wondering 

which way my shoulders would find themselves tilting today...

Reviews

[Marie Anzalone]

I love your use of juxtaposition and alliteration in this piece. Like all of your work, your poetry requires several readings to get to the heart of your subject. Upon first reading, the reader is overwhelmed in a sense of claustrophobia and suffocation and despair; it is through analysis of the second and third readings that the story of what led you here, becomes apparent. Your writing is characterized by a visceral sensation that few writers can touch; on this site I would say really only dana can match you in that area. I learn something new every time I read you- not just about you, but about writing, about a man's perception of the world, about loss, grief, redemption, survival, and living on the constant edge of a memory that threatens to overwhelm you. I am so glad to see you back on here. Thank you for sharing your art with us.

[jedi mindtrick]

Thanks for the thoughtful review and keen insight HF! I think I don't get many reviews because people don't want to invest in 2nd or 3rd reads and after the 1st they are in WTF mode. Lol. But you usually get the gist of where I am going.

[Marie Anzalone]

Very few people are either reading or writing at your level, my friend. Don't let that ever discourage you. You are a writer for the way above-average reader. Yes, I get you because I have taught myself to do immersion

[Chris]

Damn, I KNOW that feeling up close and personal...