Every face has an eye, every eye has a sight, To seek and know, what is wrong and right. Every sight has a vision, every vision has a dream. And every dream has a future, to find, to fight.
Every face has an ear, every ear hears a tale, Of good and bad, success or fail. Every tale has an end, every end has a hope, And every hope can live no matter fire or hail.
Every face has a heart, every heart has a soul, To lead the world to that one last goal. Every soul has a voice, to speak and to trust, And every voice, is one of us.
I'm full of spontaneity tonight. For a human rights contest.
Second poem I've written recently, for the first time in years. Maybe I'll get back in poetry, it's certainly a very different type of creation than prose.
My Review
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Us.
(Review for Change the World Competition) Love the structure of this work. Feel that it should have ended differently though, with some sort of stand. ‘Use these senses to crack denial, wake up and see just how powerful we are’. Humanity has so many treasures at its disposal but instead we hide in our homes instead of dancing in the mountains, we hide in our bedroom with virtual friends instead of bathing in the love and honesty of another soul. Your work has such promise and tells us what we could have. I awarded very high marks in the categories of Flow, Craft and art. This is a good strong entry, great work
beautiful piece of work. The structure itself presents details written by a true writer. The rhyme scheme was attractive. The theme was just utterly inspiring.
You deserve two thumbs up.
I really liked this poem. You have an excellent rhythm and the aaba rhyming pattern is very noticeable without being over-the-top or feeling forced.
A very inspiring piece!
This is definitely ready to move beyond reviews- please do enter it in a few contests!
Super duper amazingly awesome poem!!! I'm smacking you mentally right now for not writing until now. That's right, feel the pain. And now - I'm sorry - my criticism. You're rhyming was absolutely beautiful and you should feel proud about that since I can't rhyme to save my life. But - and I make this suggestion a lot - read your poem out loud a few times and make sure it sounds...right. It may seem ok in your head, but once you say it out loud you notice a lot of things. For instance, nearly all the lines seem to be missing syllables or they have too many of them. And I noticed that you have the stanzas rhyming with an A,A,B,A pattern which looks lovely on paper (or computer screen) but doesn't quite seem to work out when you read it aloud. You're last stanza was the best in my opinion because you didn't go with the rhyming pattern of the other two.
Disregard this whole review if I offended you. I don't want to make you insecure or anything but I always wish that people would critique my work in ways that help me improve it.
I'm from Australia, so some people may find that I spell things differently. I love writing and have had a couple of publications of short stories and novellas under a pseudonym.
I started .. more..