Bill Bailey

How I hate it but I'm falling more and more for this girl. First it was the voice, that voice! It's not even fair. The looks, the voice, the juice. It tastes and feels so good to be with her, the other broads in the city don't even compare. I enjoy them when I'm home because I know it's healthy to have more than one gal. I don't think I want another though. Her voice makes me feel as giddy as a child, her looks make me feel as protective as a father, and her juice makes me feel as craving as a man oughtta. The whole package she is and I knew since the first day she walked into the cafe and slammed the screen door behind her.

What could I do though? Before my personal life I am an employee of Sam Corolla, a soldier of Silver Dolla Sam. I knew when she asked me to take her to the city it was the most appropriate thing to do, and more importantly what we both wanted. I was what... scared? Nervous? Frightened if Sam would approve? So, I lied and made up some c**k'n'bull about wanting to give her a radio. I'm not gong to lie, it ended up being a brilliant idea. That voice was meant for Broadway tunes, not Irish folk songs. I still did want to take her away. She didn't know it, but I knew every day I spent with her.

After almost five months, I decided her uncle was worth taking the rug from under him and I'd take her with me despite the risk. My idea confirmed itself when I noticed she has a bun cooking in the oven. She doesn't realize I know, but I understood then that there was no-way she could live in Paradis anymore.

When I came to meet her and tell her the good news, it'd been over two months since I gave her the radio. Since then she'd been a non-stop singing and dancing fool. She was irresistible to me. I told her my plan for her to escape and for me to collect her. A way I thought we'd both be Scott-free. During my explanation we stopped for panic and for a moment paranoia got the better of us. We both seemed to hear the same twig snapping in the night, but it must've been nervousness. We shook it off and hugged. I can' t wait for next week. She was always mine, but it will be different to have a diamond on display and not just a hidden gem only I can see. I'm excited to show my diamond to the world and will defend her from any jewel thief who comes along.