Part 3: The Breaking of Alliances

Part 3 of the story

 

Part 3

 

 

The Breaking of Alliances

“No matter how much your heart is aching, there is beauty in the breaking.”

 

Five Years Later

 

Letter Left for Captain Soleil Isaiah, Captain of the ‘Lunar Winds’

Marked by Captain Ian Quinx of the ‘Lisa May’

In regards to New Shipment and Docking

 

Sol,

Day 175^th

We have a change of plans. We are to have three new passengers on our ships this cycle. A nobleman and his two young daughters are to sail with us. Do you recall the large shipment of wood and marble brought over three months ago? That was for a house he is having built in the country. It was said to take about a year, but he was expecting to move in right away. Therefore, he has paid us to have him and his daughters aboard for an entire cycle. Kylin picked them up four weeks ago, I did not get the message until now. When we all make dock at Port Geazi Royal they shall shift to your ship as you run a faster course. When you circumnavigate from where they are to be let out, you will let them go. He has paid in advance.

I miss you, and will see you in a few weeks.

 

Q. Ian

 

 

Letter Delivered to Captain Ian Quinx docked at Neysaw Market, Captain of the ‘Lisa May’

Marked By Captain Soleil Isaiah of the ‘Lunar Winds’

In regards to New Shipment and Docking

 

Father,

Day 192^nd

Just how old are these girls anyway? I have been hammered by a terrible storm; the engines will be needing repairs. The hull has cracked along the bottom, No shipments were damaged, though we all are a little water logged and stiff. I am heading straight for Port Geazi Royal. I may pass you. The crack has been sealed, but I would like to get it fixed as soon as possible and not risk my men’s lives any more. Zephyr has decided that the Rioce is his favorite animal.

I cannot wait to see you. I miss Kylin and you so much.

 

With Love,

I. Soleil

 

‘Can’t wait. Ugh!’ Standing here at the wheel was boring when the wind was with you and you only needed to go in one direction. Ryne had come up from the engine room recently to report that the engines were all water logged, and virtually unusable. We would make dock in Port Geazi Royal in less then two hours but that didn’t sate me. I was restless and edgy. The sails hung wide and sailing was relatively calm for now. Knocking the wheel to keep it from moving I turned to look at the large map sprawled out on the table. Tracing an invisible line with my finger, I followed the coast of the country Dukes Argels into the united territory of Worchester following it around the jutted out coast of the Wailing Isles, named for people tortured there hundreds of years ago. I traced until my finger came into a full circuit and stopped on where I started. Dukes Argels, Kylin’s home country. We had made a promise to visit his parents, but we had been putting it off because no one was looking forward to it. This time we were going, only because Ezra brought it up, and wanted to meet them. Damn seven year olds and their curiosity! Speaking of children, where had they run off too? Peaking below to the lower deck, I saw Ryne showing Zephyr to tie a square knot. Sighing I could not help but feel bad.

‘Poor Ryne.’ He was reaching his late twenties, early thirties and he had never paid any attention to girls, though vice versa was completely different. If you saw him walking in a crowd, your eyes would automatically be drawn to him. He was handsome, smart, strong, and so caring. Even though I knew I would never, nor could, ever love Ryne as I did Kylin, I knew I would envy the girl that got him; she had just better not take him away from me. I wasn’t about to lose my second in command and head engineer because of some ninny. And if it would work out that way, I’d probably offer to have her on board just so he wouldn’t leave. Sighing again, I straightened up, not even realizing I had slouched down to lean on the rail. I righted my bandana and shoved my sleeves back up past my elbows. We had just sailed in from the tropical regions and we had found that if you had light colored eyes, the sun stung. Most wore hats to shade their eyes, but I had decided to wear a bandana over my eyes, leaving just enough room to see. Zephyr’s dark hazel eyes had escaped the sun’s wrath, but I wasn’t so lucky. Mine were light enough to be burnt. Ezra’s teal eyes were dark enough, that if he stayed out of direct sunlight, he would be fine. I still made him keep hat on just in case.

The two hours passed annoying slow, but finally the harbor came into view. We were long waiting this docking. Our joints were sore from threading through ankle high water constantly. I was worried they were not going to recognize us. We had been sailing in the tropics for so long that we all had dark tans, even the white haired Zeph. Speaking of which, came tumbling up the stairs, raising his arms that he wanted up. He knew how to speak, but he rarely did it. Picking him up, I held him with one arm while the other steered. Ryne quietly made his way up the stairs to stand next to me. I could see father’s and Kylin’s ships docked, but didn’t see either one. Ezra flew on deck soaked, with some other men who were slower. He shot off to the bow, pulling himself up on to the ledge with the ropes. He was just as eager to see his father as I was. He turned back, looking at me with a gorgeous smile on his face. Oh, he was going to be a heart breaker. Docking while holding 23 pounds of wiggling flesh use to be difficult, but Ezra had been the impatient one. Always wanting up, then down, then up again, wanting to be chased or run around. Zephyr was quiet, and very calm compared to Ezra. He was also weaker and more susceptible to the sicknesses. He had been born nearly three months earlier then thought. I knew from the start I was not going to be able to have him while sailing, because of my mother. I just had this fear instilled in me, so we were docked at Cat’s tail harbor, (named because it curled like a cat’s tail). All three ships in this tiny harbor. It was funny, now, when I think back on it, but it was terrifying then.

 

“We are set to wait out the rest of the term here. I’ve closed all deals until later, and every post has been stocked for a full cycle. They only thing we’re waiting on now is the baby.” Father smiled, obviously happy he was to have a second grandchild, though he still was coddling and spoiling Ezra rotten.

‘The boy is five years old, let him breath would ya?’ The three of us were sitting around the office in the ‘Lisa May’ just chatting and planning. After sometime we stood, laughing, and made to leave. Suddenly the floor lurched out from underneath me and my head gave a sharp tug, making me cry out. I know for a fact both men reached for me, which got to me first, I don’t know. The pain stopped but a dull throbbing started up in uterus. Next thing I know, I’m sitting in a chair, with two very concerned faces in mine. My head gave another tug, and I reached hand up to hold it. Kylin held my other hand with his, which I squeezed the life out of.

When the pain stopped shortly, I looked down at my swollen belly.

“You are not being born from my head. Stop that!” With another wave of pain, I began to berate the baby.

“Bad unborn child, bad unborn child. You’re not even in this world yet, and I’m already rethinking you!” Father and Kylin began to talk fast to each other, saying things like dehydration, not enough nutrients, too little bed rest. Looking up at the door, there stood little Ezra, eyes wide. Kylin went to him. Father helped me stand, stating that from this point foreword, I was not to leave bed without His, Kylin’s, or Doc express permission. And then, I felt it, so small and slow, I didn’t think it was there, maybe I was imagining it, put on by the stress, or something.

“Daddy?” I was trying to determine if what I felt was really there. I must have looked funny because Kylin ignored Ezra.

“Daddy?” Finally he seemed to hear the boy.

“Deep breaths Sol. You’re just tired and stressed.” Father tried to calm me. He brushed back some loose strands of hair that had stuck to my forehead in a sweat I had broken out in. He repeatedly told me I was fine, and that everything was going to be ok, trying to calm my fraying nerves. I was beyond calming. Kylin was kneeling in front of Ezra, his large hands dwarfing the boy’s small shoulders.

“Yes, Ezra?” He (Ezra) pointed to me.

“Why is mommy leaking?” Everyone froze. Father’s hands on my arms tightened, my breath stuck in my lungs, and Kylin stopped moving. Ezra just blinked innocently.

“Is the baby coming? I hope it’s a boy.” Still no one moved. I thought I was going to kill myself from oxygen deprivation, but I breathed slowly out of my nose.

“Too early, somebody do something.” I hissed.

Father took over from then. He pointed to Kylin.

“You take her to the master bedroom. I’ll go get Liilia and Doc.” He picked Ezra up and swiftly left, the door swinging open behind him. Kylin carefully helped me walk to the master bedroom, and when we got there, we just walked in circles as the contractions were far apart.

“Distract me.” I whispered. I was beyond freaking out.

“How? What do you want me to do?” I shrugged, my teeth clattering together in a panic inhibited shaking.

“I don’t know, make me laugh or something.” He stayed silent for a while and I thought he wasn’t going to say anything.

“So I’ll actually get to see this one’s first two years of life?” He had a smile but it didn’t make me feel any better.

“Ok, never mind, don’t tell jokes. Yours suck.”

“Not my fault we’re in this situation.”

“Yes it is. You are the one who got me pregnant again.” I bit back.

“No, it isn’t. You’re the one who got pregnant. I didn’t force you!” I just stared at him trying to get around the stupidity of his answer.

“Are you even listening to yourself? That just made no sense.”

“No, but I’m distracting you right?” I chuckled at his antics at trying to keep me calm. It was obvious that he was freaking out too, not knowing what was going on, and not liking that I was in pain and scared. The distraction of our conversation wore off quickly. My dead brother’s face kept appearing before my eyes, the pale skin and cold dark eyes staring, just staring at me, asking me why I was allowed to live and not him. The Perfect solar eclipse. He was my opposite, he was who I wasn’t. He was named after the second most needed thing for life. The moon. Lunar, my little brother. Chills raked my body, it dawned on me I still walking in wet clothes.

“Forget this.” I walked to the dresser and pulled out one of my father’s large shirts, changing into it. I don’t think he’ll be wanting it back. I went back to pacing, and Kylin placed a blanket over my shoulders. Liilia and Doc came rushing in soon after, both looking flushed and anxious as they stepped into the room. Liilia warned Kylin that it was not a pretty thing, watching a baby brought into the world, and that it were in his best interest if he waited outside with my father. He looked hesitant in leaving, looking to me for the answer. I just nodded, telling him I was blaming him for the rest of my life, and he was to never touch me again. The labor was fast and relatively painless, but my freaking out probably made it that much harder for everyone.

 

After the last rope was tied, only then did we realize that there was no one around. Ezra was impatient for me to let him go, but I told him to take his brother below deck and wait until somebody came to get them. There had been rumors of Victor’s armies leading a thousand men to wipe out entire villages. I don’t think they would invade Dukes Argels, as they were a leading country in medicine and apothecary.

Ryne, Lloyd (a man I picked up trying to stow away on my ship) and I cautiously made our way down the pier toward my father’s ship. Not a soul moved. After a while, we made it to my father’s ship, and I told Lloyd to go back and keep an eye on things, to set up a guard and send a troupe into town. I told Ryne to stay by the cabin door, just to make sure nobody was going to pop out behind me. He told me to be careful and keep my sword at the ready. As if I needed to be told. I stood before the office doors and could hear speaking and giggling. Then everything became quiet. I silently opened the door, and leaned on the frame, taking in the scene. The door closed quietly behind me with a click. No one had yet to see me, the way the office was designed, and only the person sitting at the desk would be able to see the door. Father’s eyes flicked to me then back to the face of the man he was talking with. I stood there quietly, watching what was beginning to unfold. Kylin was sitting at a table, leaning back in a chair, his arms stretching out above his head. My eyes ate up the site, having been long deprived of such perfection and beauty. His shirt rode up, revealing the creamy white skin of his toned stomach. Suddenly I was itching to touch him, nothing too great, just skin on skin. I folded my arms tightly across my chest. He yawned widely and something giggled next to him. A mass of long straight black hair and pale brown eyes sat next to him, in a lengthy elegant purple dress with a corset of pale lavender. She held a dainty fan made of lace to her mouth. Ugh! She reeked of rich, snotty girl. Another girl sat across from the giggler, not quite so joyful. She was wearing what looked to be a simple dress of green. No extra layering or low corset. It was cut so that it sat high on her collarbone. It was supposed to end at her knees, but she wore a pair of breeches underneath. It must be too cold for her liking. She had short spiky black hair that stuck out in all directions as if she had just gotten up. There was a good chance she had, as her eyes were closed and she looked to be sleeping. I couldn’t see the man but judging by the angle father held his head, I would say he was around 5’12’’ – 6’2’’ maybe. I tuned more in their conversation.

“So as I was saying. Anglia would like to consider marriage between her and Captain Isaiah. She feels that the courting process has gone on long enough…” He went on but Kylin drowned him out. He sprung out of his chair like a cat, instantly in the man’s face. His subconscious display of speed and strength had me aching to touch him; I bit the inside of my cheek instead. I could only see his back, and the way the muscles there bunched and rippled with tension. The man must have slapped a hand on his shoulder as I could see his thin pale fingers.

“You have been courteous and chivalrous. I approve of the marriage wholeheartedly.” Kylin made to back talk but father held his hand up, silencing both of them.

“I am sorry, but Kylin is already spoken for.” The giggler stormed up in my father’s face angry as a snake.

“By whom? I see no other women here, unless of course, he is interested in the same sex, but he has shown me none of that. So tell me now, who?! And I will prove it wrong. We were made for each other, can you not see that? So tell me who!” She yelled in my father’s face. He was so close to loosing it. I stepped away from my standing place, strutting foreword confidently, I would save this girl from a wrong mistake.

“By me.” Everyone turned. The man must have thought he heard wrong because he replied

“Ah! So there is the mysterious third pilot. Man, why have you kept us so long?” He turned to his daughters. The long haired one just stared me down with a sneer.

“His is the ship you shall be sailing on.” I frowned, father had a cautious look in his eyes and Kylin made to correct him, but the man just blabbered on. Finally the girl spoke, the one in purple.

“Father you idiot, can you not tell that it is a girl? You dunce.” I raised an eyebrow at her name-calling, that was no way to treat a man that gave you everything. She glared at me, but I was sure she couldn’t see me glaring back.

“And it must be some mistake. Girls are not allowed to pilot ships nor do anything for that matter, outside of raising the children, doing the chores, and handling the upkeep of the house. What are you doing dressed like that?” She came over and ripped the bandana away from my eyes.  The light stung at first but I adjusted quickly. I hadn’t even twitched from my position, arms folded across my stomach. I just glared at her, annoyed with the fact that she had dared to touch me. She just gave this smug look, my muscles twitched to be moved. Father and Kylin watched cautiously, I knew they could see the anger rolling behind my eyes, and my last run in with someone who had insulted me still fresh in their minds.

“Look, how can she be married to someone so great? She is unworthy of him, she won’t even fight back. See Kylin? I’m better, I know how to take care of myself, and stand up for myself…” She had latched on to him, batting her dark lashes up at him. I sneered, almost to the point of growling, a habit I had picked up from Kylin. He shoved her off him, but grabbed her by the wrist.

“You, I swear, if you had been anybody else I’d have decked you. How dare you insult my wife in front of me and expect gratitude. You are mistaken little girl, you are not worthy of her, hell, I’m not even worthy of her. You are such an arrogant brat, and you are highly mistaken if you think I’ve been courting you. I suppose kindness can be taken wrongly in the hands of an abuser. Also, for your information, not that you need to know, we do have two unbelievably beautiful sons! And if you say one more thing about her, you can sail yourself around the world, see if I care!” He shoved her away again, and turned to me, grabbing me by the forearm and honestly, kissed me until I couldn’t see straight, then proceeded to dragged me up and out of the cabin. Ryne was slightly shocked to see us so suddenly, and stumbled backwards. I waved at him, and I think he got the picture, but one could never be sure. Kylin then carried on, dragging me to his ship, and I knew where he was getting at. I sped up only long enough to slow him down. Hugging him tightly I knew he was tense and shaking with frustration. Whether it was angry or sexual was pretty much lost on me, hard muscle and soft skin was all that was registering in my brain right now. Slowly he let his hands unclench (I hadn’t even known they were) and wrapped his arms around me, breathing in my hair.

“I have missed you so incredibly much. I nearly forgot what you smelled like.” His gently murmurings were sweet and made me smile into his shirt. It smelled just as I would expect it too, although there was an overly sweet smell mingled in it. It totally turned me off. I leaned back as far as I could in his grasp. It was then that I realized his entire ship had this sweet smell, and I leaned over, dry gagging, it was that over powering. He had taken it the wrong way.

“But we haven’t even seen each other in months. It’s really not my fault this time!” I glared at him, shoving through his arms to get back outside. The fresh air was like food to a starving man.

“I’m not pregnant.” I breathed out in a rush, trying to get clean air as fast as I could.

“It just smells so terribly sweet in there. How do you stand it? You reek. How did I not smell that before?” He leaned his nose against his shirt to smell himself, and shrugged.

“I can’t smell anything. Maybe I’m used to it.” I shook my head, still slightly dizzy with the after affects.

“Ok, that was horrible. I am not going back in there until it is properly cleaned.” I shivered with the gross smell still in my system. He made this awkward whining noise in the back of his throat.

“No. That’s final. Now you have two very eager sons on my ship who would love to see you, and I have a ship that needs repairing. While you guys do that tomorrow, I clean this place.” I wrinkled my nose at the thought. He still attempted to seduce me but it wasn’t working. Just the thought of the smell was turning me off. He almost had me with a few well placed kisses, but my restraint was solid as of now. Had he kissed me like that a few minutes ago, things may have turned out differently. Now it was my turn to drag him, though I didn’t need to do very much dragging. He came willingly, but his hands were everywhere, driving me to distraction.

“Kye, stop it. I can’t walk straight when you do that.” I pushed his hand away and sped up a little to stand in front of him as we boarded ‘The Lunar Winds’, but I couldn’t help laughing as he tickled all the sensitive spots. Ezra came ripping out of the cabin doors, slamming into Kylin, Zephyr came too, but a little more awkwardly, his limbs not yet sure of themselves. Kylin picked the smaller of the two up and twirled him in a circle, spinning on his heel. Zephyr squealed and kicked, flailing out his pudgy arms. He (Kylin) set him (Zeph) down and continued to walk with me towards the downstairs. Ezra followed, chewing absently on a piece of wood. Why he was doing it, who knew.

Every step we took there was a slosh as our boots trudged our way through the water.

“How long has it been like this?” Kylin lifted his leg and peered up at me. Shrugging, I turned around to face him.

“Maybe a month or more, none of the cargo was damaged luckily.” I frowned, watching Ezra stamp his boot clad feet in the ankle high water.

“Ezra go on up and wait for us there.” He started to protest, but with a pointed look from the both of us he left.

“I don’t give a damn about the cargo, this isn’t healthy. Has anyone showed signs of sickness?” I leaned back against the wall trying not to get lost in blue eyes.

“No. The crew and I have been keeping Zeph and Ezra out of the water as much as we can. We were sleeping on deck until we sailed in, a few still are, but most sleep in the office or my room as they are raised from the rest of the floor.” He gave me the ‘you should have gotten hold of me earlier’ look. I just rolled my eyes. 

“It was worse. When the hull first cracked, I thought we were going down. It was past our knees. We’ve been taking out buckets of it, and opening the bathroom doors so that it could drain in the showers. We got this far and stopped. It’s not doing us much harm right now.” I shrugged again looking up both ends of the hall, in a gloomy state to see my ship in such disarray. He shook his head and gave me an angry look.

“It doesn’t matter. All of you could get seriously sick from this. Spilt your men up between mine and Ian’s ship, you guys aren’t staying here until we fix the crack and clean this place out. I want all of your men examined by Doc within the day.” He pushed me up the first few stairs but I stopped.

“Since when do you get to order me around?” I turned around to face him and glare. His eyes darkened and seem to smolder, it sent a giddy feeling in my lower stomach, but I stomped on it.

“Since the day you took my name as your own. Now get going before I carry you.” I stood my ground, but should have known I was fighting a losing battle.

“I took your name willingly, thinking that nothing would have changed, as I do believe someone said at one point. And if I remember correctly, then that means, I was never bossed around by any man.” I smirked, knowing I had caught him. He frowned even harder.

“I am not just ‘any’ man, I am your husband.” I scowled, hating how he twisted the words around. I stood defiant though, I would not bend. He realized this and growled, pointing towards the door up ahead.

“Go. Now.” I grinned, knowing I had started something that needed finishing. I turned slowly and walked casually to the door, once it was open, I could feel him right behind me, growling in my ear, his chest rumbling against my back. I’m sure I looked quite stupid standing there, with a large smile on my face, laughing at myself in my head, plotting my course. I ran, hard and fast, through the ship, off the ramp, and down the pier. He was faster then me, so my spilt second head start was probably gone by now. I didn’t spare the seconds to look back. Turning quickly, I skidded on the pier, nearly missing the ramp to board his ship, my wet boots slipping on the slick wood.

‘Where are all the men?’ it confused me, but I had no time to spare, and dashed down the stairs and through the hall, turning when I got to the right room. The sweet smell was over powering, it almost had me curling in on myself in sickness, but as I entered the room, I hit a semi fresh whiff of Kylin. It still held the traces of the sweet smell, maybe a potent perfume, but it generally smelled of him, telling me that no one I wouldn’t want in here was here. I was almost out of breath when he came flying in, hurling us on to the bed. He twisted us so that he landed on the bottom as we bounced. Only then did I notice that I had been laughing. So hard in fact that I got the hiccups. Every few laughs a hiccup would pop up. He was laughing at me laughing.

Hahahaha hiccup hahahahaha hiccup hahahahaha hiccup

It was not funny, as my entire chest would cave in when I hiccupped, and it was painful some times. Still we laughed. Eventually the laughs died to chuckles and giggles, and stopped altogether, but the hiccups persisted. I held my breath, and I hiccupped through it, I drank some water and held my breath, but that didn’t work either. Kylin said he had an idea, but kissing my senseless obviously didn’t work. I think he knew it wouldn’t, but just wanted to so that I would forgive him. I’m such a sucker. Nothing seemed to work, I swear we sat there for an hour trying to figure out things to make them go. Suddenly, without me knowing, it happened. The ‘attack’. It was back to laughing so hard I couldn’t breathe, and doubling over. He was laughing just because I was laughing. It was somewhat funny I guess. After the ‘attack’ stopped, we just lay in bed. I was overly tired, just from being sore, and laughing a lot, and honestly, just because I was lying in a bed. Beds are made for two things, and I wasn’t having sex right now, not that I knew about anyway. So my body decided it was time for sleep and sleep I did, I curled up next to Kylin, who also seemed to be drifting off, and closed my eyes. I thought someone was at the door, but I didn’t really care. I was too tired for no reason. 

 

I woke up when I felt myself being pulled. It was one of those things, where you knew where you were, but you were still disorientated. I pulled back, and I was met with more force.

“Relax.” Came the sleepy whisper. Realizing who it was, I settled back into sleep, shifting so I was more comfortable, I breathed him in deeply. I shifted again, trying to warm the spot I had moved into up. He huffed out a sigh.

“Ya’ know. Fer’ a girl, you’re pretty restless.” I wiggled and twisted some more, pressing my body into his for warmth, I always seem to be colder then him. Finally, we settled down with me tucked under his chin. Minutes later, I had to get up. He looked exasperated. I jogged off to the bathroom. Damn bladder, always having to remind me it was there. This time when I returned to bed, the covers had been pulled down. He held them up as he did every time, forming a little cave. Toeing my boots off, I crawled between him and the covers, and got situated.

“Anymore things you need to tend to? Or are we good?” I glared at him.

“Don’t blame me for my bladder, that was its fault. Besides, I’m sure you would have fallen asleep in the time I was in there had you not moved.”

“Fer’ a girl, you’re pretty restless,” He growled out as he shimmied down next to me.

“But that’s ok, ‘cause I’m pathetic and can’t sleep properly without you here.” He mumbled. I smiled, and dipped further into sleep. Something was nagging me though, at the very back of my mind. At last, we began to doze off. It came to me then.

“S**t.” He groaned. I pulled myself from under the warm blankets.

“What now? Get back here.” He pulled me back under, wrapping an arm around my waist to keep me there.

“Whatever it is can wait ‘til morning.” I kissed his lips softly.

“No it can’t. Now let go. I have to get Ezra and Zeph’s dinner.” He growled.

“Let them feed themselves.” I poked him in the chest.

“Hardly, they’re seven and two. One isn’t even capable of standing for an extended period of time, I don’t think he can get himself dinner.” He made the whining noise.

“Somebody will take care of them, just stay. I hardly ever get you to myself.” I sat up, smacking him.

“It is not ‘somebody’s’ job. ‘Somebody’ didn’t choose to have children. Now stop being so dramatic. I’ll be gone for maybe an hour or two.” I tugged myself free of him, and slipped my boots back on.

“You know, you could come.” His hand waved me off.

“No, I’m just going to lay here and sulk that my lover can’t even stand to stay in the same room with me for at least an hour.” I rolled my eyes.

“Have fun with that.”

It was bitterly cold out compared to the tropics, or maybe it was just me being over sensitive. I really would have rather be under blankets with my husband, but we do what we have to do. Pulling my sleeves down, I vowed to grow a thicker hide. Trekking onto ‘The Lunar Winds’, I found everyone standing (and sitting) around, just talking, some laughing. I instantly felt bad.

“Listen men, I hope you guys are capable of doing this, but don’t strain yourselves. Spilt yourselves up, half on the ‘Lisa’, the other on the ‘Chaser’. I’m sure you are all tired and hungry, hopefully in a few days,” I patted the rail softly

“she’ll will be up and running in top condition.” A small cheer went up, and they disassembled, leaving in groups of two and three. I walked downstairs, not wanting to step into the freezing water, but I did, cringing as I did so, searching out my sons. I found them in my room, curled up under some blankets on the bed. The room was dim, and there were blankets, pillows, and mattresses all over the floor. Stepping as quietly as I possibly could, I sat down next to them. They looked so doll like when they slept. Ezra’s skin had taken on a dark glow, Zephyr’s was porcelain white with a hint of the dark tan, and they looked to be perfected dolls, laying at rest. They had small hands, and soft, feather like hair that constantly fell into their bright, reflective eyes that portrayed the utmost of innocence. They had rosy cheeks, and pink lips, and long eyelashes. Zephyr had on faded blue denim overalls, with a long white shirt on underneath. Ezra had on a simple t-shirt and a pair of shorts. I was brushing the blonde locks out of Ezra’s eyes when the door opened behind me.

“I thought I saw you come down here.” Ryne stood, leaning back against the door, his arms folded across his chest. I smiled. He came to stand next to me, stepping quietly through the mess.

“I brought them down here when Zeph fell asleep.” He chuckled then.

“Ezra swore he wasn’t tired.” That only made me smile more. He reached over and pet Ezra’s hair. Suddenly it struck me. It only made me feel that much worse for something I couldn’t even help. Ryne wanted children. He had taken care of me all my life, and now I was grown up. He wanted something of his own to raise now. My smile dropped. I was taking the world around me into new perspective recently, and it was seriously screwing with me.

“Come on. Let’s get them to Kye’s ship.” He reached over and carefully picked up Ezra, who, acting on instinct leaned foreword, and wrapped his arms around Ryne’s neck. I scooped Zephyr up in one arm, him doing the same as Ezra, and draped a blanket over Ezra. I wrapped a blanket around Zeph, making sure no heavy droughts would get through. We trudged tiredly through the water, and back up on deck to stare at the rising stars. They blinked at us, as if in a signal. Had my mother been here, she would have read the stars, and told us to what was to happen in the days to come. It made me miss her terribly, thinking about her. It reminded that she would never get to meet her grandchildren, or Kylin. Some times, it made me so upset to think that this world, that has given me so much, took almost everything from my father, and took her from her life. I wish so much that she could see me now, hoping she was proud of me, and the path I had chosen. Ryne brought me back to reality of a shivering child with a slight cough. I had lost myself once more in something I would never truly understand or want to. My mother was gone, and that was all I ever need to know, to be reminded not to forsake anything. We made it a fast trip between ships and by the time we got there, all of my men had gotten situated, and Kylin’s men were busy making room for my men. We snuck into the boys’ room, and laid each one in their respective beds, tugging boots off, and pulling the sheets and blankets up high. Stirring peeked out from his hiding place in the cupboard above Ezra’s bed, and quickly found his place on my shoulder. He made an odd cooing noise to show that he was happy that I was here, and then jumped off to ball up under Ezra’s chin. He had taken to Ezra, and was quickly becoming the boy’s pet more then mine. Zephyr gave a harsh cough in his sleep that raked his body. I frowned, thinking I would have to get Doc to look him over. Rubbing his back softly, I sat on the edge of his bed. The cough eased up, and he started to breathe more easily. Ryne shifted from where he stood.

“You’re doing good Sol. They’re good kids.” He shuffled his feet, and my heart only felt more pain.

“I know.” I whispered, turning to flash him a brief smile. Doc had said when Zephyr was first born, that he didn’t expect him to live long. He was under developed, and he had no immune system. He had given him two seasons at the most, But Zeph had pulled through, and he had proved himself strong, though I cried every time he became critically ill, as he had been a few too many times in his short two years of life. He did not live without the threat of severe illness or death. He took multiple vitamins in the morning, and had to be kept on a balanced diet as his body weight was on the low side and would drop drastically. 

We left the room, and I bade Ryne good night. He offered the same terms and went his way. I slunk back into our room, stripped and pulled on a t-shirt and long pants, crawling into bed with my eyes half open. Kylin helped me under as I was fumbling and reaching too short of a distance to grab the blanket. I noticed vaguely that he had changed too, and showered as he smelled purely of himself and not the perfume, but that meant nothing to me, I was exhausted and in need of some calm black sleep.

Nightmares plagued me most of the night. Images of torn sails, and large masts. Of faces dirty with grim and sweat, their teeth either missing or black with plaque. Some were thin and frail looking, but it only added to their appearance. Some were large burly men with beady eyes and hefty wickedness rolling through their hunched frames. They screamed of pain, of fear, of everything that a sailor was taught to avoid and dread. Pirates. They carried with them swords of rusted metal, or dull edges and some kept knives up their sleeves or in their boots, as I kept mine. One man stood out among all the rest, one eye a painfully familiar blue, the other a blood red. He was tall and muscular with distinct features that were carved into his face and arms. It covered what was seen of his body and probably what wasn’t seen. Straight from the edges of his eyelids, to the cuticle of his black nails, dark blue and green lines, etched into his skin. They created designs that were there and not there, an eye’s trick to what the mind thinks is there. He black lips pulled over his rotting teeth that reekedq of meats and liquor. He smiles a grim little smile, a sight in his eyes that I could not tell you for the life of me what was. He stared in my direction, eyeing whatever it was up as if he had never seen such a thing before. I realized all too soon it was I being studied. We stood in a small cabin, with a long table and unpolished silver cups and plates. The rough wooden floors beneath my bare feet creaked with each light step I gave, and groaned with each stomp he took. His lithe frame danced around the table as I moved to avoid while he moved to capture. I would not stay in one place anymore then I would offer my own sons to the darkest depths of the sea. His lecherous eyes spoke of many things I dared not think for just the thought would send me to my knees. Just as suddenly as he was there, he was gone, leaving the dread like a stone in my stomach. I felt him faster then I could see him, the hairs rising on my arms and neck in warning, but one given too late. I was lifted up by the waist, and carried away. I kicked out, shouting, screaming, and scratching at anything I could reach. Blue and green meshed with red and I began to let the sickening reality drive home when my ankle struck something far more solid then would let pass, and the bone gave before the skin. It sent me reeling up, a storm in a renewed fury. I fought with more vigor, pressed on by the pain. When I grew numb to that, I prayed for another quick instant moment, just a second of a reminder that there as a reason to fight. It came when I felt his hands travel all over me. I screamed louder, pulling his short hair, tugging strands out in handfuls, scratching at his eyes, ripping the skin just below his eyes. He did nothing but growl, and tell me I was only making it worse. He grew angrier and angrier at each minute I fought back, trying his strength. I would not let up. I howled with fright and pain and anger, screeching my misery to all who were above.

I woke screaming, thrashing about erratically. I fought more when a hand was placed flat on my chest to hold me down. My breath came in inconsistent pants as I struggled, weakening myself more. I refused to open my eyes, to see the triumph in my captor’s eyes. Someone repeatedly called out my name, whispering for me to wake, to come to my senses. My arms were pulled up, over my head and held there, yielding my scratching. I bucked and kicked, whining and whimpering. A heavy weight was sat on my stomach, preventing me from doing any more damage though I still tried. It only served to tire me out more. I finally gave in, deciding to conserve my energy for the fight to get free. Someone called to me softly, and I was confused to find my face was wet, tears seeping from my worn, gritty eyes.

“Soleil, my love, please, open your eyes. I will not hurt you.” I was resistant, but the voice sounded so sincere, and in pain, I had to, just for the sake of finding out who I faced. I peeked my eyes opened slowly, travel up from his bare chest, to wide shoulders, and the beginnings of blonde hair, to icy blue eyes that almost had me frantic and hysterical once more, but the remorse was too deep for me to be afraid. I tugged experimentally on my hands, and though he was reluctant, he let me go, seeing that I wasn’t about to scratch his eyes out. He sat back on his haunches, still on top of me, but not on me. There were pink scratches on his cheek, across an eye, bright against his collarbone and chest, which was heaving with breath. I sat up carefully, peering around. I remembered where I was and whom I was with. I turned back to him. His eyes were wild and anxious, bordering on a man on desperation. He reached out cautiously with his fingers extended, brushing the side of my face, and pushing a few strands back behind my ear. My heart drank at the feeling I got, and the feeling I knew was broiling inside of him, feeling it radiate through his finger tips. It was almost as if the move had been choreographed. I reached for him, wrapping my arms around his neck, and he clung to me with his arms encircling my back. We stayed like that for I don’t know how long, just holding each other. I told him the dream and he comforted me, telling me I would never have to worry about such a thing. My mind would not let such a thing pass unnoticed though, and I slept poorly the rest of the night, though he stayed awake by my side, ready to protect me if the dream started up again, and ready to hold me if I was in fear. I spent much of the night just lying in his arms, tracing the lines of muscles with my index finger while he hummed and pressing cold fingers to red, tender sores. Dawn came slowly but steadily, up the sky, making me feel a great deal better, but even then, we didn’t move. It was just us against the world, and right now, we needed each other. It never occurred to me that I might have woke up the other crew members, I was lost, lost in this room of ours, lost to reality, lost to realism, lost to everything that mattered and needed to be taken care of or dealt with. We were with each other and that was all that mattered, we were so emotionally lost in each other, we barely heard the knocking at the door. Kylin answered it with a tired annoyance and heavy shoulders. I was still fighting off my nightmare, killing the images, and feelings, killing the smells and textures. It was a very long process that would leave me feeling more confused, I wasn’t able to catch all of their conversation, but certain words and phrases escaped past my ears.

“…Not feeling well…mare…”

“…heard her…plagued…little…”

“…remember.”

“Come…help.” They began to whisper and then parted ways, Kylin coming to lie down next to me. He traced lazy designs on my cheek with the pad of his finger. I knew we would have to get up soon; we had things to do. My ship needed repairing, this place needed a good wash down, and whether we liked it or not, miss giggler needed to be talked with, and Ezra needed to do his studies. Sighing I sat up, not being able to lay down anymore, angry with myself to have been so worked up over a dream. I rubbed a hand through my hair and came up with knots.

‘Wonderful.’ I thought at myself, thinking of the disaster that was my hair, and it was oily. Hair always seems to become oilier when tossing and turning in bed.

 

I must have passed out some time between my thinking, because Kylin woke me up, helping me to the bathroom. I stumbled along as if my legs were made of gelatin. The shower was steaming and spurting semi-hot water in flecks of drops against me. He helped me strip and step into the shower so I wouldn’t end up cracking my head open if I tried it myself. My fingers were dull and unresponsive when I made to grab or pull something, and I was dropping drastically into a numb sense of things. I must be over exhausted.

“I’ll be back in ten minutes.” I nodded; I think I did at least. Almost instantly, when the door clicked shut, I slide down the wall of the shower under the spray of water. My hair was soon soaked, and I brought my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them, and lay my head back against the stone wall. My back became chilled as it was not receiving any of the hot water like the rest of my skin and I began to shiver. I didn’t move because I liked the cold, it was shocking my numb system. I knew I was sulking, but I couldn’t shake the ominous feeling that came with the dream. It was if it was trying to warn me of something, but I couldn’t wrap my head around it. I didn’t think it was the fact that I was going to be taken by pirates. Most of them had been extinct, they were a dying race, and they dare not sail straight into a port. There would be no other way they could get me. My ship was the fastest out there, and I ran a faster course then father and Kylin. If anything, they would try to strike the ‘Lisa May’ but that seemed unlikely, as father was not a person to be handled so carelessly. Kylin’s ship was faster then the ‘Lisa May’ but slower then mine, they could have him, he is the last to be on course, following behind us all, but he is very particular on course, and always docks right on time, never a minute late. If he were boarded upon, we would know instantly. And of course we each had our distress flags, when in need we send them up, and any merchant or sailor is obligated to either contact the authorities, or help. So, being captured was out of the question, but what did it mean? I must have lost track of time, because the door opened with an audible click, and Kylin came into view.

“Oh, Sol.” He looked worse for wear. His face was drawn and tired looking, with dark bags under his eyes. I could only look at him, still in my sitting position, and frown. His eyes still held the wild look, the kind an animal gets when it is scared and unsure. My heart churned with the thought that I had done that to him.

“Sorry.” It was pathetic and wimpy, but it was all that I could muster. It was getting to be a bit much for me. I was tired of wallowing in a pool of fright. He took me by my arms, pulled me up to stand, and kissed my forehead. I tried vaguely to help him as he washed my hair and body, but I was too tired, falling asleep as we stood there. The last thing I can recall was he picking me up, and carrying me back to bed after drying me off. The sheets and blankets were pulled up around me and I dropped into darkness with one final message from him.

“…love you.”  

 

I woke some time later, just how later I wasn’t sure. What woke me was the creak of a drawer, more exactly, the third drawer on the dresser parallel to the bed. My eyes snapped open, and I sat up quickly. Kylin stood in mid action, he was pushing the drawer closed, and had a shirt in hand when the noise had awoken me. A wet, dripping shirt, covered in grease lay on the floor next to the hamper.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.” He pulled the shirt up and over his head, his stomach and abs pulling tight as the skin slid over then, showing off two lines of ribs on either side. I was almost sad to see the skin covered up by the cloth. It was muggy in the room, which felt damp and moist. Moreover, I realized that I was extremely hot, even in my nakedness.

“How long have I been asleep?” He came over to lye back at the foot of the bed, turning to stare at me.

“It’s about midday. The sun is high and ho…”

“What?! You let me sleep that long?” I was up and scurrying through the room trying to locate certain clothes, and my boots, while pulling a brush through my curly hair, and brushing my teeth, all at the same time. He shot an arm out, catching my around the waist as I passed him in my hurry, jousting me to a stop.

“Would you slow down? You’re making me dizzy.” I stood still, but still yanked the brush through my hair, pulling it back into a high ponytail. He frowned, stating that he liked it better when my hair was down. I ignored him, running the million things I needed to due today through my tired head, the major one on that list was thoroughly clean this ship from top to bottom. The second was to get rid of the bottle of the perfume so as not to contaminate my ship (once it was repaired and we could set sail again). I tried wiggling out of his grasp, but he just tightened his force and gave me a stern look.

“Take it easy today. You hear me?” He questioned my attention when I started looking around the room for a bandana.

“Sol, listen to me. Take it easy.” I nodded, not trusting myself to speak without yawning. He stood up and pulled me to him, wrapping his arms around me. My jittery nerves instantly settled and I nearly dozed off standing there. Reality came knocking when he stepped back, and I nearly stumbled foreword. He gave me another stern look, before taking my arm and walking me up onto the deck. I was thankful, forgetting just how disgustingly strong the smell was, I almost passed out. When on deck, I received the full force of the midday sun. Everything from then on moved rather quickly. I was set to clean Kylin’s ship, him and the rest of the men were already working on mine. I hope that I would have her back by the day after tomorrow. The two sisters visited upon me before I had even started. I had found their names to be Madrigal, the short and spiky haired one, and Anglia, the longhaired one. I was clad in a two-piece bathing suit and baggy shorts that went past my knees, having already been beaten by the broiling sun. The guys had it so easy, they could strip down half naked and no one would bat an eye, except any girls that were eyeing them up. From the looks of the crowd down there, I was right. The short-haired sister just watched me as I worked, never butting in or making comments. The long haired one was quick to make remarks. When I had first started, she was shocked.

 “You can’t be serious! You’re going to clean this entire ship, by yourself?” I just nodded, soaking the rags in the warm water.

“That is going to take days! We want to leave as soon as possible!” She felt the need to shout, though I was practically right next to her. I just nodded again, focusing on my work. It took me nearly two and a half hours to clean the entire deck, and polish any metals. By then the afternoon was getting on, and the sun only seemed to be driven by the hours it had left to shine. I steadily worked my way inside, cleaning the floors, walls, ceiling, doors, any glass, and polishing any metal. Anglia had given up on dissuading me, and I am guessing left to go ogle the men. My other guess was that it was mainly Kylin she was going to ogle, and that made me slightly angry, but hey, she could look all she wanted (At nothing more then what was showing as of now), but if she touched, I’d break her perfectly manicured fingers.

It was getting into the late evening, and I still wasn’t finished, and I had nearly bit the head off any of the men that came on, stating they would ruin all my hard work, that gloss and polish hadn’t dried yet. I was soaked in sweat, making my skin glisten, and I had rolled up the shorts, as I had gotten the bottoms wet. Madrigal asked, as I sat back, heaving with tiredness and heat, if I needed help. It was so quiet that I had barely heard it. She said, she was not very good at manual labor, but was willingly to try. I smiled, taking whatever help I could get. Examining her, I guessed her to be about my size, a little smaller, so I gave her an old t-shirt, and some shorts, and we set to work. The second set of hands really did help, although she had dropped the bucket twice, spilling dirty water all over my clean hall floors as we went from room to room. When the last of the buckets were poured over the edge into the water, we gave a sigh (more like heave) of relaxation. We both lay, exhausted, on the deck, spread out, and trying to cool ourselves in the evening air. 

“Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever done that much work ever, and I didn’t even really do anything. I’m beat; I think I could sleep forever.”

“If repairs aren’t done yet tomorrow, I’ll be over there helping, you should sleep in. You’ll be sore in the morning.” During our adventures, we had talked and gotten to know each other. Her name was Madrigal, but she hated it, she liked the nickname her mother use to call her, Maddy. She was 15, and hated life as a ‘woman of high class’. She hated sewing as she was horrible at it, and she would much more prefer teaching, as she was secretly teaching herself how to spell and do mathematics, and every now and then, she would sneak a book out of her father’s study. She was beyond awed when I told her that my father had taught me all of that when I was young, as it was necessary for being a merchant. To keep our minds occupied, as cleaning left you with an empty mind, I would ask her math problems, and she would have to solve them. She was good at it, almost better then I was, and a professional teacher taught me. She told me her father cared more about Anglia, solely because she was the prettier of the two, and he was waiting for a rich nobleman to marry her. I became annoyed, and decided that if I sat there anymore, I might get up and deck her father. The more she told me about him, the more I thought he was a coward, hiding behind his money. We decided to go see how the men were doing.

We stood on the pier behind most of the men, some of who were in the water, some on the deck, and I’m sure some in the engine room. When they turned to us, some started to whistle. It was the humor I needed to lift me out of my black mood, laughing I crossed my arms over my chest, a few aww-ed. Kylin took a swing at the person closest to him, the man danced out of his reach. He knew they were playing, at least, I hope they were playing. I stretched my arms high above my head, stretching out my body as far as it would go, and pirouetted. I received some more catcalls, and could not help but laugh. The glare I received and the promise for revenge was well worth the teasing. Some of the men were laughing as well, so it was all in good nature. Madrigal seemed to close in on herself, preferring to wrap her arms around her body, then stand confidently, like I was. A good reason for that would be that I was eight years older then her, was married, and had two sons. Body shy no more! She had every right to be shy, even though she was covering more then me. I told her she could go back and get change if she wanted too. With a hearty blush and a vigorous nod, she was off, down the pier, and on to Kylin’s ship. I couldn’t help but give a chuckle at her expense while the men returned to the last of their work. I walked up to Kylin (who was still glaring at me), and Anglia stormed up to stand between us. The 16 year old looked me over, obviously disapproving of either what I was wearing, or my attitude. Like I cared.

“How is she? She gonna’ make it?” Anglia looked beyond confused, but Kylin understood what I was talking about.

“If everything goes smoothly, we should have her up and sailing in a day at most.” I nodded, happy to hear some good news.

“Your ship, I don’t think it will ever be this clean again, and you,” I turned to face the 16 year old.

“Are not allowed on his ship, or any of them for that matter, with whatever crap you are wearing. You’re going to make us all sick especially my sons.” I turned away, and she began to argue.

“You can’t stop me from wearing it, and I’ll have you know, it is Per’deux Sontia, the highest quality perfume on the market.” She whipped a small bottle about the size of my index finger that was just as slim slim, out of a fold in her petticoat. Where she hid it, I will never want to know.

“I’ll have you know that this bottle cost my father 203 scirts.” Her face took on this smug look, and I just stared. Doing the math in my head that was about, well one scirt was equal to 250 pence, so 250 times 203 would be, carry the one, equals 7, add the zero, and carry the one again. In total, it equaled 50,750 pence. That was a lot, considering the fact that my ship cost (to make), about 400 thousand pence. The logic baffled me, who would waste that much money on something that smelled bad, and would be gone in a month or two of continuous use. My ship had paid for itself in a year. Kylin had an eyebrow raised as he saw me calculating the numbers in my head. I just shook my head. She rambled on, probably not even realizing the debt she may have caused her family, no wonder her father was so eager to marry her off.

“Everyone who is anyone has this, and…” I cut her off.

“Kye, I think she has this misconception that we actually care.” He laughed, catching the attention of some of the men on board.

“I think you should set her right then Sol.” He was chuckling, and more of the men were listening now, interested in what we were saying. I took her aside, by the edge of the pier, as if I was going to reveal some big secret. She leaned in, most likely expecting me to whisper.

“We don’t care! Just stop wearing it!” Some of the guys started laughing, and she became flustered.

“Oh yah!? You think you’re some big shot? Think you can talk to me like that?” I nodded.

“Yes I do! Now would you mind getting out of my face?” She just leaned in closer.

“Well,” She stumbled for words, a plan clicking into place in her eyes.

“See if you like this!” She pushed with all her might against my collarbone, and I tilted backward. A memory flashed before my eyes of something very familiar happening, but this time I wasn’t going alone.

She gave a scream as I pulled on her wrist, and she came tumbling in after me in a greater splash. Suddenly my tiredness was made all too apparent. My limbs felt weak as I kicked to the surface, my lungs strained. I could see Anglia flailing about and could hear her screaming. Someone was calling out my name, most likely Kylin. Suddenly her form disappeared from the water, I could only assume one of the men had helped her out. The stretch from where I was to the surface seemed to take forever, although I know it was only two, maybe three feet. I surfaced slowly, only the top of my head peeking out of the water, leaving the water line about four centimeters under my nose. I glared up at everyone, unhappy that I had, without fail, been pushed, or fallen into the stagnant water of the port. Everyone was silent, the laughing had ceased. Anger was boiling over in me, and I was certain the water around me was going to start bubbling any second, or that there was steam coming out of my ears. I could see just enough over the pier to see Anglia wringing out her hair and dress, complaining and yelling all at the same time. Placing my hands carefully on the pier, I shook off Kylin’s help. Anglia and I were glaring at each other. Using the muscles in my arms, I levered myself up from the water, and placed my foot on the edge to push me up into a standing position. If she wasn’t gone in three seconds, I might do something I’ll later regret. I was beyond angry, I was calm. Closing my eyes, I took several deep breaths, trying to push past the lump in my chest. Her ranting did not help any. Without looking up, I said:

“You have three seconds to be gone, or I may do something that will give my father a bad rep.” She began to argue with me again.

“One!” Kylin took hold of my shoulders, whispering sweet nothings to me, but it only fed my rage. She still argued, stating the she would not be bullied.

“Two.” My tone dropped as I counted higher. I pushed out of Kylin’s arms, rolling my shoulders back, hearing them crack loudly.

“Sol.” He warned, his tone cautious and demanding.

“Three.” My eyes flicked open, and there stood the center of my attention. A low rumbling started in my chest, making its way up. Stalking foreword, I grabbed a handful of black hair at the back of her throat. She gave a chortled cry, scratching at the hand that was pulling her hair. My grip was unbreakable. Kylin rushed up to us, trying to pull my arm away.

“Sol, let go. Let go!” I barely felt him let alone heard him. It was if I had tunnel vision. Anglia was sobbing now, Kylin’s tugging only making it that more painful, the force in his grip around my wrist was bruising. Any more pressure and my wrist may have snapped. Ryne came storming off the ship, the pain in my wrist breaking my tunnel vision. My eyes darted to him; he was covered in black, and was somewhat wet. We all were close to breaking out in a brawl. Ryne, who was always protective of me, pulled Kylin from me, and tagged him in the face. The sound of skin impacting skin made an odd sound; the hard punch forcing his face in the direction the punch was thrown.

“You almost broke her wrist! Are you crazy?!” Free from Kylin, I put my makeshift plan into motion. I waited for a few more moments, while the other men made a move to keep Kylin and Ryne apart so that they didn’t beat the living daylights out of each other. They couldn’t keep words from being tossed though. I pulled Anglia by her hair along with me as I made my way down the pier; she was screaming and sobbing, tears pouring down her face.

“Next time you will do as I say.” I spat at her harshly. She stumbled as she griped at my hand, trying to break free. I damn near dragged her. I was practically jogging down the pier I was walking so fast. Father came down from his ship and Maddy’s father too. He was shocked, to say the least, if the look on his face was to say anything. I thrust her out, letting go at the last second. She tripped, falling into her father’s arms.

“Have fun sailing yourself around the world, you are not setting foot on my ship.” Father looked bewildered. Kylin and Ryne were approaching fast.

“What is the meaning of this? Ian?” Maddy’s father questioned. Father shook his head.

“I know nothing of this. Soleil, what is going on?” Anglia spoke first.

“Daddy! She’s horrible! I didn’t even do anything, she just snapped.” She sobbed into her father’s shirt. I just glared.

“Yes yes, fear me. I eat the hearts of men and spit fire. If you fear me so much now that I’ve snapped you should see me when I’m really angry, go ahead, piss me off some more!” That’s when we were happened upon by Kylin and Ryne. Kylin snapped in her face.

“You lying little rat!” She just sobbed some more. He turned to me.

“And what is your problem? You should know better!” That angered me all the more.

“What’s your problem? Choose one side of the table to defend! It’s either me or her!” Kylin had me by the wrist again, gripping it tightly. I couldn’t help the whimper that came out as the skin was pinched and pressure put on the bone. Ryne stepped in to help me.

“Let go of her!” He shoved Kylin back, and Kylin, who had always been a little jealous of Ryne snapped back, letting go of me and grabbing Ryne by the throat.

“Stay out of this!” I forced my way between them, beating on Kylin’s chest for him to let go.

“Let go of him!”

Father struggled to order the chaos. His booming voice broke through all arguments.

“Everything will continue as planned. We will leave in two day from now, Madrigal and Anglia will be boarding with Soliel, Christophe, you will be with me.” Maddy’s father, Christophe reacted first.

“I daresay, if Captain Isaiah,” I cut him off, throwing a harsh glare at Kylin.

“Soleil, Captain Soleil.” Kylin frowned, the anger rolling behind his eyes. Christophe rolled his eyes.

“Captain Soleil, is treating Anglia this way, and threatening her life for no reason, I do not think I want them on her ship.” Father nodded, understanding as always, and assured him that I would not harm either girl. That got me started.

“I will not have her on my ship. Maddy is fine, but I refuse to have this wench on my ship.” She reared up at that, throwing names my way. I wasn’t done yet though. I turned to Kylin.

“You take her, I’m sure you and your girlfriend will have a ripe old time.” It was a low hit, but I was pissed. He growled, but father beat him to it. I didn’t even see it coming though Ryne had, as he made to warn me but it came too late. Father lashed out, striking me across the face. I was so stunned, I stopped breathing. Never had my father laid a hand on me in anger.

“Stop acting a child Soleil. You can not have everything your way.” Still not sure if I had continued breathing, I hissed. Kylin cracked first, yelling at father.

“Don’t touch her.” His defense only fueled me more, and I pushed him back.

“Stop defending me like I can’t do it myself!” My head was spinning from lack of oxygen and tiredness, and I felt a spur of weakness come over. I stepped back, away from them, rubbing my temples. The men were consumed in their arguments, and barely noticed me step back. In the middle of Kylin ranting, and Ryne defending me, I lost sight of the world, only for a short time. My hearing, and sense of touch were perfect. I heard Anglia scream and a splash of coldness enveloping my body. When sight came back to me, I was in a murky blue and grey world. I think I didn’t continue breathing before, because my lungs stung. I tried to take a breath, but I inhaled something else, something more solid then air, but not a complete solid. My head scratched on a pole, I think, and something scraped against my yielding skin. I felt little pinches, but nothing compared to the burning in my lungs. My vision was taken from me again, the little black spider webs at the edge of my sight taking over and turning my world grey, then black. I was vaguely aware of a splash above me, some distance away. The blue around me swirled and swished, a sharp tug began pulling me by my wrist, and just as I lost my thoughts, I felt something wrap around my waist.

 

I dreamt again, this time, I stood next to the tattooed man, facing out over the open ocean. The winds whipped my hair into a frenzy and swayed the sails this way and that way. We stood watching over an entire crew as they hauled large ornate chests across the deck to below deck. We were on a large ship with rotting wood and holes in it, the sails were a dull grimy yellow and had patchwork. We stood there for what seemed like forever as the sun rose. The hours ticked by when finally we dropped sails and coasted into a small cove off a rocky shore. We sat in hiding, covered by shadow for some minutes when it turned the bend in the cliff side. A relatively small ship made of dark wood and tall masts. Its flag was a setting or rising sun, and a half moon mirroring it. SC where scrawled across the line that separated the two entities. On the side of the ship, in large script in silver read ‘Sun Chaser’. The ambush was fast, we were on the ship before the crew had time to react. The tattooed man and I led the party quickly seizing the ship. Our men raided and pillaged though a few of the ship’s crewmen fought back. They were easily killed. I engaged the captain on the upper deck and he stared me down with wide eyes. My sword was already drawn and I held it to his neck. He said he refused to draw his sword on me, that he would not be able kill I even if he wanted to, that he loved me too greatly to do me harm. I traced the tip of the blade against his throat, nicking him slightly. He drew on instinct, and we danced about each other. Some times our bodies came so close they were one, breath mingling and lustful heat passing, and at times we were a sword and arm length away, the chill setting back into our bodies. This went on for some minutes, and I found we were pulling closer to one another more then pulling away. His icy blue eyes sent chills up and down my spine, sending goose bumps across my skin. I knew him from somewhere, but I couldn’t remember from where. My heart pulled at my mind for me to recall, but nothing came fourth. And just as he wasn’t there, he was there, the tattooed man, wrapping an arm across my shoulders, pulling me back away from the other captain. He smiled a grim little smile over my shoulder at the man, placing a light kiss on my cheek. We retreated from there, no one stopped us. We returned to our ship, and just as I was crossing over, the blue-eyed captain came to me, gripping my arm just below my shoulder. He begged me to stay with him, to return. My heart lurched and I just about stepped back, but I saw the pistol ready for one of us, and I yanked my arm back. Who was this man to me anyway? What purpose did I have with going with him? None.

We sailed away, leaving the scarred ship behind. I stood solemnly on the upper deck staring out over the waters as we continued on, the men riling in the treasure of our stolen goods. I could think only of the betrayed, hurt look on the man’s face as we left his ship, and I knew it was for me and no one else. The last thing he said rolled around in my brain like a raging storm.

“Soleil, you pirate.”

 

We sailed on for some time, making only one stop to offload our prize on a secluded island in the middle of the never ending sky and sea. The same routine alerted me of what was to happen. We dropped sails, and slipped into the darkness of a shadow. This time a much larger ship rolled around and the crew were quicker to react. There was a massive fight and the tattooed man and I spilt up, deciding to take two sides at once. I had yet to tell him, the tattooed man, my secret that I had been shielding for the past week or so. My hand not holding the sword instinctively went to my belly, pressing in on the skin as if I would be able to feel what was inside. I was with child. My musing caught me in a delayed sense and I was dragged into a room where the door slammed closed. I fought against large hands that held me in place and I was met with the eyes of a handsome man with black hair and vibrant green eyes. He asked me if I was ok, and if I had been hurt. I just looked at him confusedly once I realized there was no danger. He embraced me, pulling me to him and thanking who ever was out there that I was safe and had been brought home. I didn’t understand what he meant. He then began to question me as to why I had not stayed with Kylin when his ship was hoarded. Again, my instincts took over and I pushed him away, turning to fling open the door and run up the hall. It was as if I had grown up here, I knew the corridors and halls as I knew the back of my hand. It was all highly confusing and disorientating. I made it back on to the deck and there the old captain stood, among all the dead, both his and my men lay. He saw me instantly and his sword was at the ready. He talked with me calmly, trying to determine what was going on and if I was on their side or the pirates side. I just cocked my head, still unsure of everything these men said. We circled each other, it was nothing like the dance with the other captain, it was not intimate at all, more like heavy and tiring. We made few strikes at each other and soon the tattooed man was there, cautiously speaking. He would flicker his gaze to me then back to the other man. I was struck dumb when he told the man that he would not want to hurt his grandchild. The tattooed man had known about the child. I stopped evading long enough for the old man to reach up and slip his sword up to the hilt in my stomach. His large hand lay on my shoulder, and tears were evident in his voice. He begged for my forgiveness, but he loved me too much to see me live my life this way. The tattooed man grimaced, and yelled out, but was silenced by the green eyed man’s blade, he too had tears in his eyes. My body grew terribly weak very fast, and soon the only thing supporting me in this up right position was the man. My vision faded with his tears on my cheek.

 

I woke slowly, my eyes not wanting to wake. Wheezing, I was forced to sit up and cough. My lungs stung horribly and my throat was sore. A large hand against my chest forced me down and I looked up suddenly to the owner. I stared at the face as if I didn’t know it, but the memories that came back nearly had me in tears. How could I have forgotten? Pitching upward, I draped my arms around his neck. He returned the embrace, then let me go, pushing me back down.

“Rest some more, I’ll come back in a few hours.” Before I knew what was happening, my eyelids slid closed and my head dropped to the pillow.

 

When I woke again, it was because someone was waking me. His hand was on my back, gently shaking me.

“Sol, wake up.” I groaned and bunched the blanket up under my fingers. I was reluctant to leave sleep, the black dreamless sleep, not the one filled with nightmares of pirates. Where were these dreams coming from anyway? What did they mean? The hand on my back shook me some more.

“Come on Sol. I know you’re up, you stopped breathing again.” He saying that brought the swimming in my head fourth and I took a deep breath. Angry that he knew me that well, (which didn’t really make sense if I thought about it, but I refused to do that right now.) I shoved his shoulder, hoping that it would push him away.

“Go away, sleep.” He sighed, and moved back. Only then did I hear the other set of footsteps. They were heavier, and more tired. You could tell by the way that they dragged slightly. I turned on my side and glared in that direction, knowing that person was the reason I was being woken. My eyes were sore and my lungs felt like the air I was breathing was too heavy for them.

“Sol, get up. We need to talk.” Bingo, my father. Oh joy, he was the first person I wanted to see right now, not. I threw him a glare again, and turned back on my stomach, fully intending to go back to sleep. Kylin had other plans that did not include me going back to sleep. I felt his arms slide underneath me, and I was flipped on to my back, quite awake now and tangled in the blanket and sheets. Kicking the sheets and blanket off the bed, I sat up glaring at the both of them.

“What? I’m up now, what do you want?” Father just crossed him arms, Kye sat on the floor next to the bed, his legs crossed.

“You need to apologize.” It was obvious he wasn’t suggesting. I shook my head, adamant about this subject.

“I will not apologize or go within ten feet of the rat, I might catch some of her awfulness, or her smell.” Father frowned, most likely not liking the fact that I had either:

1. Talked Back to him,
2. Not listened to a direct order,
3. Had insulted the rat again.

I didn’t really care. Kylin must have (cared), because he called my name in a warning, as if to warn me I was crossing thin ice. I shot him a dirty look as well.

“Hush up puppy dog. Just because your master’s orders aren’t always followed doesn’t mean you have to attack.” The wide eyes were supposed to tell me he was shocked, but all it did was irritate me. Father coughed to break our staring match.

“Fine, Soleil. Be that way.” A small smile made its way to my face but was stopped short when he continued.

“But ‘The Lunar Winds’ will not be sailing then, and you will either be with Kylin or I.” My head snapped around at him so fast the bones in my neck cracked in a row. I sneered at him, almost tempted to growl, but not yet ready to defy my father to such a great extent just yet.

“It is my ship, I will determine whether it sails or not.” At this point, I was standing up, ready to defend myself if needed, which, if I thought about it, was silly. These men were my father and husband; they wouldn’t do me any intentional harm. Still, my mind rebelled against the force in which they were restraining me.

“It is final, ‘The Lunar Winds’ will not sail until you apologize.” My jaw tightened up to a point where my teeth hurt and my fists balled up tightly.

“Sol, just do it, it will make all of our lives that much easier.” Kylin was sitting on the floor looking up at me. I turned my head to the side, keeping my eyes trained on his, my neck muscles as well as my calf muscles pulling taunt. His eyes glittered with exhaustion and dared me to oppose him in this state. Knowing from experience, whenever he was tired, his patience was always thin and easily broken, and he was never in a mood for joking around. The anger was rolling around in my stomach and the queasiness was riding up in my throat. How could my husband side with the enemy and not me? That was what made me most angry. The red-hot anger rose up, rearing its ugly head and I kicked out at him, shifting all my weight at the last minute to my left leg. My poorly aimed kick would have hit him in the side of the head, but his reaction time was faster then mine and my leg was caught just before it made contact. His powerful hand was wrapped around my ankle and squeezing quite hard, firm enough to pinch the skin through my pants. He rose up and I bit the inside of my cheek and glared harder. His gaze was cool and dangerous as he folded my leg against my body, keeping his grip. Forced back and onto the bed I sneered and growled, the pain never lessening. He just frowned, and father shuffled in the background.

“Kye, let her go.” Father’s voice echoed around us but I don’t think either of us heard him. As of now, it was a battle between us to see who had the stronger of the tolerances. He leaned down to breathe in my face, his cool breath smelled of mint and some type of sweet fruit or something.

“Do not be so quick to forget who you belong to.” He hissed, the venom in his words striking.

“You will do as I say, you belong to me.” He was barely whispering, but his words were laced with what he thought to be the truth. My lips pulled back over my teeth in a silent hiss.

“I belong to no one.” He growled a low rumbling in his chest that vibrated up and down my spine.

“You’re right, you belong to no one, my wife wouldn’t be fighting over something so trivial.” He spat.

“Maybe she would and you just don’t know who she is.” He looked as if he was going to strike me but his hand lowered and instead he let go of my ankle, but took a good grip of hair from the back of my head. He dragged me off the bed and onto my feet, pulling me across the room. Father made himself known to us then.

“Kylin, let her go!” I didn’t realize I had winced out loud.

He snapped at my father, telling him he would not let go until I looked in the mirror. Funny he should say that, because I had been avoiding the mirror since my first nightmare. Fear rolled in my chest at what I might see, and if I had changed any.

He held my head up by my hair and told me to look, I refused and he rigorously shook my head side to side. Unfortunately, I was forced to look up and I could only stare.

What I was met with was not what I was use to seeing. My hair was the longest I had ever let it grow out to be, ending at the bottom of my shoulder blades, and was curly and messy, but it didn’t look bad, which was weird. My skin was pale and cold to the touch, and my eyes were dark with circles underneath. My cheek bones were a bright pink and all together I seemed darker and colder in person. Father threw his hands in the air and stated he was done with the bunch of us and to come to him when I was ready to either apologize or sign the papers to beach my ship for however long the voyage took. I ignored him. Looking up at Kylin through the mirror, I was shocked to see him so disheveled and worn. His eyes were wide and dark as well, his browny blonde locks disarrayed, and a rather tiresome look that showed up as if he would rather be sleeping then doing whatever he was doing. My pulse slowed considerably and my breath evened out as I calmed down. He let go of my hair and turned me around to hug me. It didn’t feel right. Once more, I felt alien in my own body, as if I didn’t fit my skin right. I could feel his arms laced around my back while one hand threaded up into my disheveled hair, I could feel every nerve that was touch grimace and try to back away.

“Is my ship done?” I said quietly. He nodded, his cheek moving against my temple.

“I’m not apologizing,” His shoulders dropped.

“And my ship is sailing out.” He sighed heavily and pushed us towards the bed. I sat down and he kneeled in front of me, resting between my legs. He held one side of my head in a hand and rubbed the opposite cheek with his other hand, the thumb gently going over my cheekbone.

“Sol, why can’t you just listen to us on this? We’re saying this for your own good.” I pressed into the palm of his hand, inhaling the woody scent. He sighed softly when he knew I wasn’t going to answer him, and his grip became harsh.

“Tell me would you, please, what have you done with Soleil? I know for a fact that she would never act this stubborn. Please, can you tell me where she has gone?” His face betrayed the strength in his grip. It was pleading and sorrowful. I could only stare at him as he questioned me, the inquiries barely registering in my brain. 

“I don’t know what you are talking about. Maybe you just didn’t know the real her. Maybe she ran away because of that.” His eyes closed to slits, his pleas went on.

“I know you are not her, she would never say something so callous. Tell me where the woman I married is!” He was gripping my head on both sides, his face so very close to mine, but everything seemed distant to me as of now.

“She’s dead, left with herself because no one would see her side.” He threw my head to the bed, standing up as he did so and storming off to the door, stopping just short of it.

“Would you tell her then that she is crueler then I would have ever thought for leaving me without telling me. I will not stay with someone I do not love, I would not do that to the one I do love, and I know myself. I do not love you. Tell her I shall be along soon, and you can be fed to the darkest depths of the deepest seas and all the monsters that lay hidden there. A fate befitting your atrocious personality.” He left the room with a slam of the door, and heavy footsteps.

Those words stung in my chest, making it painful to breathe. My breaths became labored and my head light. It passed slowly, and I moved on, continuing with what I had to get done. I showered slowly, taking the time to really soak in the water, but dressed quickly. I wasn’t even aware of the clothes I had put on until they had already been put on. A black, tight long-sleeved t-shirt that clung to everything, but hid my ribs, and a tight pair of breeches. I brushed my hair out, choosing to leave it done, and tugged my boots on, the knee-highs. As I made my way on to the deck, silence was present. Kylin’s men just stared.

‘I’m guessing he said something to them.’ I turned my head to the upper deck, and was met with a glare. I delivered mine, and strode over to Ezra, picking him up. He argued, saying that he was old enough to walk on his own. I carried him any way, and I knew Kylin was catching on fast. Just as I stepped off his ship, I saw father coming off his. I sped up, knowing my time was short. I made it to my boarding plank when I was accosted. Kylin grabbed my belt loop and held me back. I handed Ezra off to Ryne.

“Take him and Zeph below.” He did so without questioning me.

“Get your hands off of them.” Kylin hissed at Ryne, but I drew my sword quicker then he could move, placing it neatly on his shoulder just missing his neck.

“Get off of my ship.” It was calmly said, but the meaning behind it was all too clear.

“Soleil.” It was a whisper from on my ship and I glanced back briefly to see that it was Maddy.

“You might want to get off.” She shook her head, stating that see wanted to go with me. Fine, let her choose her own destiny.

“Soleil, be reasonable.” Father was speaking to me over Kylin’s shoulder from on the pier. Anglia was standing there, clutching her father’s arm and sobbing. There was a small crowd forming along the edge of the pier consisting of sailors and shop owners.

Kylin was cautious, moving the tip of the sword with his fingertips off his shoulder.

“Sol, you know we have rules we have to follow. You can’t do this.” I smiled, my teeth never showing.

“Well, if I’m to go by you, I’m not Soleil. I can do whatever I damn well please. Now if you will, off of my ship.” He frowned, the thought of moving never crossing his face. Anglia sobbed some more, begging her father to help Kylin. Christophe turned to father, demanding to know what was going on.

“Madrigal is on that ship! Stop your daughter! She is out of line!” Father snapped at him telling him to shut his mouth, he was being of no help at the moment.

“Soleil, whatever was said, you need to come down here.” My sword tip flicked back up to Kylin’s throat, nicking the very edge. The blood enticed me and fed my delusion.

“Soleil, please, you need to see a doctor,” I cut Kylin off.

“No. What I need is for you to get off my ship! Now move!” I whacked the side of his neck with the flat of his sword. He flinched but didn’t move.

“All of you, you will all be charged with piracy!” Kylin yelled over my shoulder. I turned half way towards the men on my ship, keeping my swords edge trained on his neck.

“If any of you wish to leave, do so now! And take this fool with you!” No one moved, and the air seemed tensed.

“You understand don’t you!? You will be charged with piracy! Most likely incriminated for it as well! You are all idiots if you do not leave!” I yelled at them, slightly pissed that they didn’t leave but it gratified me to feel that they were that loyal to me.

“Sol, you need a doctor, please.” Kylin tried pleading once more, but I would have none of it. Fed up with this taking so long, I stepped back, fully on to the ship and hit the boarding plank hard with the heel of my foot knocking it into the water,  and watching as it hit with a large splash. Anglia gave a loud scream and Kylin a yell as he was dropped into the water. It was over quickly, father had jerked foreword to reach for Kylin before he fell but was getting too slow in his old age. I told the men to cut the ropes, and jogged up to the upper deck, steering our way out of the port and in to open water. Just before we were out of sight, I gave a shallow bow and sheathed my still drawn sword. Kylin’s head was lost among the wake my ship was producing but at the moment I didn’t even care if the man drowned.

 

We were on our way, and I was staring down at a map. No one dared approach me, and I could understand why. My little display had earned me enough of a reputation for now. Ryne came to me about an hour after I had dumped my husband off my ship and stole away.

“What are we going to do now? There is a chance they will follow.” I nodded, completely aware of these things. Knowing my father and husband, they would try to get me back before they would claim piracy on me. Technically, Kylin and I sailed under my father’s name. We were employed by him, his power was what kept us from the law. He was what ruled over us, making the major decisions. When it was just him, the king ruled over his actions. Now he ruled over us, the king would not have to bother with us. As of now, I had stripped myself of my father’s title, so I was now sailing under my own name, or under Kylin’s name. Since women were technically not allowed to sail, I was sailing under my husband’s name Isaiah.

If he longer loved me, and would not stand to be with me, and wished me to the seven hells of the darkest oceans, I would no longer keep his name as mine in good spirits.

As of now, I was free to do as I liked, and no one was going to stop me.

 

One Year Later

 

The winds were a torrent against us as we fought to keep our feet. The ship shifted under our feet as the waves rolled and thundered past, some washing over the deck. Ezra stood next to me as I tried to keep us on some type of course. The swells were grand and juggled us around. Gripping Ezra’s collar, I pulled him up from him knees. The deck was so coated, the wood was slippery and our boots were waterplaning. Ezra slipped again as the water surged up, falling towards the stairs. I pulled him up once more, shoving him into the rail as I myself slipped. I brought our faces close together.

“Go below. Check on your brother.” He fought me, telling me he wanted to help up here. Rolling my eyes, I gave him a nudge towards the stairs, nodding at the closest crew man.

“Go check on the cargo, make sure it is secured!” He nodded, obviously feeling the cold and water all the more. The rain poured down on us, drenching everything exposed. He stumbled down the stairs, and one of the men below helped him to the door.

“Stay with him!” I shouted down, and the man nodded. A crack of thunder sounded overhead and lightening illuminated the night sky. The storm raged on until the dawn and even then it still raged on. It gave us a little leeway among the early hours, the sea calmed some and the waves lessened. Ryne and Lloyd met me on the upper deck and I left Lloyd at the wheel.

“The storm is only supposed to get worse, all the men are tired and wet, I don’t think they can take another hit like that.” I nodded, looking around the deck to judge the damage. Nothing was too damaged, but everything was saturated.

“We’ll tell them to rest up for a few hours, shower and get changed. I can handle a few hours by myself out there.” I flicked my water filled bangs out of my eyes and continued down stairs with Ryne. The rain still pounded the deck with a steady beat. I went to Zephyr’s and Ezra’s room to find the youngest sitting on the floor playing with a stuffed rabbit and Stirring.

“Zeph, where’s your brother?” The boy just looked at me and grinned, totally consumed in his playings. I turned out of the room and pulled two of the men who were walking towards the shower (shirtless might I add).

“Have either of you seen Ezra?” They said no, but they would keep an eye out. A search party began, about six of us, including me and Ryne, looking all over the ship as the rain poured down form the skies. Finally someone gave a shout and appeared around a corner minutes later. He was toting a sleeping nine year old in his arms. Upon closer investigation once we laid him down on his bed, I found a bruise the size of my palm on his forehead. Rage boiled up in my, and I saw red. Maddy came rushing in from my room when I called for her.

“Stay here.” She nodded, her face caring as she retrieved a cold cloth to place on his head. I called everyone up, telling them, no matter what they were wearing, everyone was to be on deck. Singling out the man Ezra was supposed to be with; I literally dragged him, placing him in front of the shivering group of men. My rage had raised my temperature so I wasn’t cold. I pointed a finger at them, my voice as loud as it could go.

“If I need to stress this one more time, I swear, you all will regret it! Once more, and for the last time, everyone is to travel in at least pair. NO ONE, and I mean no one except me is to be alone. For all of our safety, you will do this.” I turned my gaze to the man that had left Ezra alone. His name was Azsaruu. He had sea green hair that he frequently dyed odd colors, and dark brown eyes. He had no special facial features, and he was of medium build. Nothing that struck me special. Giving him a dark look, I crossed my arms over my chest. He knew instantly that my attention was on him.

“Are you deaf?” he shook his head no, water droplets coming of the tips of his hair and landing on my face.

“Are you stupid?” Once more, he shook his head.

“Then why in the hell did you leave him alone?!” He winced under my gaze, but stood strong. He muttered something but I ignored him. The headache I had before was coming back full force now. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I placed a hand on my hip.

“Everyone back inside.” No one moved. My eyes squeezed shut, and the rain felt nice on my heated skin.

“Now!” Most everyone was jolted into action then, all heading for the lower floors. I resumed my spot at the wheel, and navigated my way through the rough ocean waves. My fingers were numb and I could only hope my head would soon follow. Ryne came on deck a few minutes later, soaked the instant he stepped out. The rain was relentless, coming in sheet after sheet. The waves, thank fully, had calmed and were beating to a rhythm once more. The excess water drained but was then replaced by the rainwater. It was a never-ending cycle of elements, and we were stuck in the middle.

“You should really take a break. You’ve been out here all night.” I shrugged, not really caring what was happening at the moment. He sighed, and turned to stare at the map laid under glass. He trailed a finger from what would look like a random point on the map to a person who didn’t know navigation, and followed it up and over a ridge, stopping on a small isle.

“We should stop there before we make it to the cove; we can freshen our supplies and let everyone take a good night’s rest.” I nodded mutely, agreeing that was exactly what we needed silently. My rage was still hot and Lloyd came up moments after Ryne had spoken. He had a hat clapped over his wide head and unruly hair, holding it down with his right hand. He practically had to shout over the rain.

“Ezra is alright, Maddy is taking good care of him, she said it’s just a bump, that he must have hit his head on some of the cargo when we were hit by a swell.” He paused momentarily to wipe the water that the hat was supposed to keep out of his eyes and readjusted said hat.

“She said he should wake up in a little while.” He stood, not yet leaving, but it was clearly evident the man did not like standing in the rain. He was visibly shivering and his unoccupied hand would clench and unclench every few seconds to keep the biting chill off the bone. Finally, after making him stand there for some minutes, I waved him off, telling him to tell the rest of the men to use their time wisely and to sleep as much as they could, and to use as much hot water as was necessary to fend off the cold. He grinned and practically skipped to the door after hopping the entire staircase. He had barely stuck the landing, his boots getting no purchase from the slick ground, forcing him to place a hand down behind him. Ryne had completely ignored us, returning to the map.

 

Hours passed as the day continued on and finally as the dusk broke over our heads, the rain slowed and came to a stop. Soaked through to the bone and feeling queasy, I took my leave giving control of the ship to Ryne for the time being. I checked in on the boys and tended to Ezra’a bruise, making sure Maddy hadn’t done anything to irritate it. I mean, the girl is good with medical supplies, and she has a grounded head on her shoulders, but she is accident-prone. Speaking of such, I bumped into her in the hall, as I made for my room, literally, bumped into her, or she into me. She was running through the halls towards her destination and turned a corner, knocking into me. I caught her by the shoulders.

“Wow, where are you going in such a rush, trust me, we’re still on the open sea, nothing new.” She rolled her eyes at my attempt at humor but stayed silent, peeking around me, and over my shoulder. I looked behind me to find nothing.

“Some great secret behind me?” She shook her, biting her lip.

“And why are you out here alone? Did I not make it clear that everyone is to travel with a partner? Don’t think you are any different.” She cracked a smile finally, and I threw my hands in the air.

“What is with this ship?! They find my orders funny and my jokes morose!” She clasped my hands in hers.

“I’m sorry Soleil, but Ryne is on duty.” She gave me a pleading look, and I couldn’t help the wide smile that planted itself on my face. She blushed heatedly, the red coating nearly her whole face and neck. I let her pass.

“Very well, and Maddy, please be careful! It’s extremely wet out there!” I shouted after her retreating back. I couldn’t help laugh, it was too funny. Was this how everyone on my father’s ship felt when Kylin and I were like this? No wonder we were teased so much, this was insufferable. The thought of Kylin crossing my mind brought a brief reminder of his face, and the latest quarrel to hand. I would have to drop Ezra and Zephyr at the next port, they were no longer safe here. As I continued on to my room, an uneasy feeling filled my chest with the thought of leaving them there, by themselves until Kylin docked a few hours later. Perhaps I would leave Ryne with them. No, I couldn’t do that, with ship would not be able to function with out his help and Maddy would be heart broken. The dilemma plagued my mind as I showered and changed. The hot water was like rain to a drought, massaging out all my aches and kinks. I hadn’t realized I was in the shower for so long until the water went icy and bit into my skin. I swore and stepped out into the steamy room. The mirror and frosted glass had fogged over and the air was dense with moisture. Running a towel through my hair, I made faces at myself in the mirror, a habit I had picked up from Zephyr. The boy thought it was the funniest thing to make a fool of himself to himself. My hair, which desperately needed to be sheared off, was knotty and had spilt ends. Reaching through the drawer, and pulling a razor knife out, I cut the ends of my hair off, taking about two inches, and even then, it fell down my back. I had let it grow out when I had Ezra, and I never cut it short from then on. Pulling a brush through the mane roughly, I walked out into my room, heading to the dresser for clothes. I examined the bruise under my right breast carefully, making sure not to put too much pressure on it. Some idiot hadn’t fully secure the sails, and we lost the ropes halfway through the night. One with speed and strength behind it slammed me into the side of the ship. No doubt the ribs were cracked or broken. Pulling a shirt over my head, and shorts on, I continued with the brush, ignoring the burning of my wrist which had suffered a sprain and rope burn from the same incident. 

Two hours passed gradually and I obtained no sleep. I tossed and turned, twisting the blankets and sheets around my legs, tangling them up, and finally kicking them off the bed altogether. My skin felt like it was on fire again, only this time, worse, as if I had molten lava running through my veins. I scratched at my legs and arms, feeling like I was tearing out of my own skin. The cold sheet I was laying on did nothing for me, except make me feel like I had needles pushed into me. I’m sure I screamed, but I couldn’t tell. Scratching at my throat, I pulled at my skin, and whimpered. The heat was becoming too much. I kicked out; fling my legs out, and clawing the bed. My fingers began to slip on my skin, no longer scratching as I was covered in sweat. My skin stung, my legs and arms throbbing as well as the pulse in my wrists and neck. The pillows had been pushed off the bed, and I rolled, and turned, trying to find peace. I didn’t even know how this feeling had come upon me. Frustrated that my nails were doing nothing, I dug harder, using more pressure. My ribs on the right side were aggravated and agitated. My head was splitting open, I was sure, and my eyes were going to liquefy. I raked my nails up my calves again, needing to claw my way out of this skin. The pain was horrible, the worst I had ever felt in my life. My heart thundered, my breathing was short, gasping except for when I screamed. There was noise outside, over the waves. It didn’t make any sense, murmurings that grew louder and louder in volume. The room rattled and shook, and I swore I was going to be sick. The heat rose up in response to the noise and I could only scream louder, and whimper when my nails couldn’t dig hard enough. My breath was labored now, it was difficult to get it past my throat, and my mouth was dry. I cried, but no tears came, just the verbal equivalent. Speech evaded me, and the murmurings were now shouts, and demands. I clawed the bed once more, sensibility was gone, and I was now feeling like a trapped and wounded animal, the ones that will chew off their own limb to break free of a trap. I tore and scraped, and mutilated, attempting to stop the heat and pain. I was in hysterics. A loud bang sounded out, but it didn’t stop me, only frightened me the more. I pulled and tugged at what little clothing I had on. It was irritating to the heat and made it that much more painful. Someone was on me then, grabbing my wrists, holding them above my head. I felt my eyes roll back in my head as I bowed into the bed. I kicked out, struggling to break free, his (by the sheer power of the strength) skin was just conflagration against my heat, and I tried wrenching my hands free, but he held strong. My eyes rolled back again, and my breathing lessened all the more. My head must have been in two or more pieces by this time, it felt as if nothing was as it seemed. I had only ever been this frantic once before, and the man who held me down was my husband. On reaction I called out for him, he had ceased the fear the last time, surely he would stop it this time. As if my call had been answered, I was lifted off the bed, my arms still above my head. A high pitch squeal argued with the man and he snapped at it. I felt cool tile against my thigh and I nearly passed out when the cold water touched me. The fire didn’t recede, but was mollified some what. My breathing eased, and my head calmed some from its revolt. My stomach was not done with me though, and I emptied all of the acids and bile into the tub floor where it was quickly washed away. I jerked my hands out of the man’s, and curled up on the stone floor directly under the spray. The water was most likely becoming steam, there was no other possibility, my skin was just too hot. The scratches flamed up under the spray and took a vengeance of their own. Whimpering, I pressed myself into the floor harder, trying to force the pain out. The man’s callous fingers pulled back my wet hair from my face and laid a hand on my head.

“She needs a doctor, maybe even a hospital.” His words were hushed, but they rolled around in my empty mind like a bell toll.

“No one will take her, not like this. They’ll either think her mad, or with the pestilence.” A girl’s voice was there as well, but not as loud, softer, and less harsh. My throat burned with the acid I had puked up, and my eyes were sore. After some shuffling and silence, I peeled an eye open to see what was taking place. The tub was filling, it was about a third up, I was lying over the drain, making it slow. My eye was submerged, but I still could see over the ledge with it. I recognized Maddy and Ryne, they were standing in the door way. Silly, I hadn’t recalled him taking his hand back. Maddy had his shirt balled up in her fists and her face buried in his chest. He had his arms around her, his head bowed over hers. His one hand ran circles in a soothing way on her back. A muffled sob reached my ears faintly and I knew she was crying. He spared a look over towards me, then led her from the room. Being some what immersed in the water felt good against my magma. I covered the drain fully with my body, preventing any water from draining. The water rose higher and higher, and my body rejected it at first, so I held my breath as it rose more, spilling over the edges in silent waves. The outside door had slammed a while ago, and now there was just silence, silence in the chaos of the world. Pictures filtered past my eyes, they were blurred in tints of red and brown and most of all blue. The familiar sensation of my lungs burning brought my attention to reality, which I had lost momentarily. My body knew what was going on and fought it as it had a year ago when I feel faint and off the pier. However, I had no energy to fight it, and soon, neither did my body. It gave in, and the images returned. A film on red. A boy standing at a door, he screamed, but the sound was a gurgle. My vision was leaving me, and I was glad the heat was leaving as well, the coldness seeping back into my bones. On the fringes of my consciousness, I knew that this was it, that I wasn’t going to wake from this nightmare. The boy from the red film came back into view but his voice had never left, like a siren to warn the dead of a new comer. A girl appeared, the same one from before, but she didn’t look at me, instead she knelt before the boy, who stood in a room with a bed covered in blood. He screamed and screamed, and she begged him to tell him what was wrong. There were others behind her, all unsure of what to do. He, the boy raised his arm out and pointed right at me, his eyes never leaving mine. The girl looked at him quizzically, going to the door. The shower was sounding, the water pelting off the pool. She thought nothing of it until she stepped nearer, and her feet made a splash. The world was fading more, the images becoming transparent. My eyes closed to a half lid, and a door swung open. The was a high pitched scream, and they were grabbing at me, the hounds of the black seas. The dogs that took the lives of those who were daring enough to set skin in those waters. The ghosts of past wars and mistakes, the graveyard for ships. Ships went there to die, and they took with them their entire crew, for who would operate them in death? The hounds of these waters rid the ships of the impure, those who would abuse the power of death. They, these ships, sailed eternally in the space between life and death, transporting those bound for death to the nine gates of purification. Nine gates to be reborn, not all succeeded, but that was the point. Not everyone would be brought back to life as someone else, that way history could never repeat. As I lay dying here, no one will ever do as I have done, I will stand as a warning to those who will come after me. These ships, these monsters with black sails, and white wood, would also ship those who were to be reborn to the five gates of personification. They would shed their previous life for a new one, a different one.

And there they were, those dark, morbid ships, with the hounds biting at their heels, and one came straight, headed my way. The captain, a man of just bones and sinews, waved his hat for me, hailing me down. This was my stop, and I would no longer proceed with life. He came to me, holding my hand delicately, using a strength I did not have to pull me from the cold waters, and lift me into his arms, where he set me down in the boards of his ship. The blinding white of the woods was painful, but it made me forget the way my life was taken, it was all a blur, and I could not recall why I had been in the icy water to begin with. He smiled a broken smile and told me that he was sent to pick me up first thing, that I was waited for; I shouldn’t have kept them waiting. I apologized, stating I could not remember why I had stayed. He told me that the sea loved me, that she did, but now it was my time to rule the sea of the dead. I looked to the waves and found us sailing on soul upon soul. The dogs, those black and piteously bloodied hounds howled at me in a mournful call, but continued on their way, not sparing me a glance, their attention on a soul who had risen up from the sea of souls. They tore at it, pulling it in the four directions of the world, and with a horrid shriek, it ripped like tissue paper, and the mutts each took a bit, devouring it to save themselves. The sails rippled and swayed with the non-existent wind, and the captain smiled once more at me, telling me that I was beautiful, the sea in a human embodiment. I wore nothing but my skin, which was rapidly fading along with the light from the chilly water from which I was pulled. We moved farther and farther away from it, but suddenly the ship, a giant in its time, a god of death, gave a horrendous groan and ceased to move, the sea of souls swiftly flowed past, rubbing against the bright hull. The captain cried out, and reached out to me, but that hand of bones fell short by the width of a fingers flesh.

“You can not have her! She is destined to sail forever, you may not take this from us, we are the gods you answer to! He ranted on and on, and the ship began to break apart. I did not move, frozen to where I stood by some greater force. A wind did begin to pick up then, swirling around us and none other. The dogs came, baying and screaming, their howls like banshees. They mooned over the fact that they could do us neither help nor harm. The ship began to piece off, drifting out, and the souls clung to these life lines, pulling themselves from the masses. The dogs were on them quickly, trying to hold the revolt back, those that made it into the air would pass the nine gates of purification altogether, and head straight to the five gates of personification. There were too many though as the ship was large in size. Men, crewmen, fell into the ocean and the dogs set upon them at once, but these were a different breed of hound. These creatures had no definite form, just a mass of black, spilling over an outline, bubbling and boiling, its skin popping and hissing. They made no sound, but the waves parted for them, and devoured these men whole, consuming them entirely. The men made the worst sound a human could hear. It sound as though they were being torn limb from limbs, as their souls were dissolved and disintegrated. I could only watch all of this, horror struck and amazed such a place existed. And there he was, the creature that lay in waiting, in hiding, just for me. His head that of a beast with two mouths, one just below the first, and black holes in place of eyes. Lined they were, those mouths, with razors and pincers, gashing and clicking unmerciful, ringing in my head. A stairway appeared, the middle step the board I already had my feet on. The wind nipped and slit my skin, slicing into the tender skin of my thighs and breast, of my belly and shoulders. They bled, and the skin spilt, scratches appearing over my legs and arm, my neck as well. The worst were on my calves, where the skin was torn from bone. My cheeks cracked along with my forehead. Everything burned, as if I was on fire, but this was a cold burn, as if I was placed in a freezer. Everything was icy, except my lips, which would be warm suddenly, then cold, as well as my chest, in this one spot, just above the diaphragm, were it would feel as though it was being pushed on, and then the warmth and pressure would recede.

“Soleil!” Suddenly looking up, towards the bottom of the staircase, I was met with identical eyes to my own. They reflected me and someone behind me, but the gaze held mine with power. He was tall, lean, torn up, bleeding, beautiful, handsome and dangerous. He was my brother. He too stood before me in nothing but the skin he wore. It was whip lashed and burnt. His dark hair fell into his shadowy and expressive eyes. His face held the same bone structure as my mine and his skin was the same pale. He was the most handsome man I had ever seen, and a sudden urge came over me to go to him, embrace him. I had not seen him in twenty-two years. He held his arms out for me, beckoning me to him, and I nearly took a step.

“Soleil!” The voice calling to me was more feminine, with a slight lilt. Turning in the other direction, I came face to face with my mother. She was everything father had told me she was, pale hair, slim build, soft facial features, light eyes. Her eyes were shining with tears, and unlike my brother and I, she was clothed, in a cloth of white that went from her shoulders straight to her dainty feet. The woman hugged me, and held me at arms length.

“Soleil, my girl, what in the name of the king are you doing here?” I stared at the bright white of the stairs, only now realizing that the sea of souls had disappeared along with my hunter. I returned my eyes to her and gave her a sheepish smile.

“I can’t remember. Haven’t I always been here? This is all I can remember.” She gave a sorrowful smile, placing her hand on the side of my face.   

“My girl, I’m sorry you have ever seen this place. You must return at once to the boy, he frets so over you. You are ill, and have been so for quite some time. Now return, go now, back the way you came.” Before I could answer, Lunar had his hand on mine.

“Sister, please, do not go, do not leave me, not again.” He whispered into my ear, pulling me toward the bottom of the staircase, but mother would not let go.

“Lunar leave, she is not for here and you know that. Now leave her be and return to your post.” Mother frowned at him and he sneered.

“Defend her as much as you wish mother, you will always favor her for something I can’t help. It is not my fault I was pulled here!” He stomped his foot like an impudent child. Mother frowned harder, her mouth creasing at the corners.

“Lunar, my son, I love neither of you more then the other. You both hold the same amount of space in my heart. Yes, you are right, it was not your fault that these powers had you pulled here, but do not force Soleil to be here. She has a life now, a husband and children, would you have them motherless?” The woman pleaded with the man and he sneered again. I didn’t trust what I heard, unsure if I should. Could I truly believe I had children and a husband? I could recall no memory of them. The pressure on my chest became frantic and harder. Still the mother and son argued, the man stating that I should not have the pleasures of living if he could not. The woman must have won out over the man, because he disappeared, dropping down through the stair he had been on, dropping into the black, never making a sound. Mother turned to me then.

“Come Soleil, return to your world, you are not bound for this place yet.” I shook my head again, but this time in earnest.

 “Mother please! I want to stay with you!” I cried, clinging to her. She forcefully pulled me off her and held me at arms length once more.

“My, child, you have grown. I am pleased with you; you have made me proud to be your mother. Now, be a good girl and do as I say.” The waterless tears poured down my face, disappearing into the nothingness of the black pit below us. She placed her palm against my chest where my heart was and muttered something. A pale light glowed and my chest gave a terrible throb. My lungs began to burn and I looked up in fear at her.

“Mother?” How could she cause me such pain? Wasn’t I her daughter? How could she just hurt me that easily? She gave me a pitiful look, telling me that she was sorry but it was what was needed if I was to return to my world. This world, the one of death and decay and torture and pain faded away. I lay suspended in some room of black with nothing. I coughed, and warm liquid trickled from my mouth, dripping down my chin and on to my fingertips. The fire and lava returned all too quickly after that and I stayed in this suspended space, waiting it out, cradling my pained heart and lungs while the fire rose and sunk when ever it chose to do so. I was merely a puppet for it, at times, I fought it as I had when on that ship, in that room, and other times I lie there and let it ravage my body. Memories came back to me, they were fleeting and swift, but they told me all I needed to know. My mother’s last words knocked around my empty skull for my entire stay in this place.

‘Forgive and ask for forgiveness Soleil.’  

I was unaware of the time passing in this darkness, but I was brutally aware of the pain and suffering. It was made as clear as day. Speaking of such, I longed to see the sun and the sky. I wanted it back, I wanted the sea and its calm rhythmic swaying, I wanted the burning sun, and the crisp air. I wanted my friends and family back. I wanted Kylin here, but that, I knew was one thing that would never happen even if I did make it out from this world. He probably hated me at this point. I mean, he had a right to. I threatened his life, and I caused him misery.

 

My personal hell dragged on for lifetimes. At some point, I noticed that I was snapping and yelling and arguing with people that weren’t there. I would constantly see them, but they were never actually there. It made life frustrating. In this space of nothingness, there was worst then silence, there was no sound, I would not even hear myself whimper or scream, only aware of it by the breath that left my lungs and the soreness of my throat.  

I no longer opened my eyes to this world, as there was never anything to see but black.

 

Life be came a routine, lay there in pain until there is no pain.

I peeled my eyes apart this moment as flashes appeared through my eyelids. I was blinded by color and light, by smell and air. I tried to touch my face to make sure I wasn’t dreaming, but my hand was held back by a strap that was tied off on the edge of the bed I lay on. Panic ate at my distraught mind, forcing me to hysterics once more. The room was overly white with a pale blue bed spread and curtains. The wooden floors were the only dark colored surface in the entirety of the room, even the dresser and chest where a pale white. I fought against my restraints, and a woman in an orderly outfit came in with a man in blue with a white over coat.

“She’s going into another fit, should we up the dosage?” I made as much noise as I could, fighting and screaming. I had been suspended in nothing for so long that the sights hurt and the sound was sure to make my ears bleed, but I kept on screaming and fighting, all for the fact that I was no longer in that blackness. The woman pulled a needle off a tray and the man came over and held my shoulder down. I was bucking and kicking, wrenching at the restraints around my wrists. My arms strained and my heartbeat was wild, my pulse thudding like a river in a flood. I heard it then, my ears picking up on his voice automatically.

“What’s going on? What’s happening?!” I fought more, the man had difficultly keeping me down. He yelled out that he needed help and two more women rushed in.

“Sir, please I need you to stay out here, she is still unwell, she is having another fit.” I whimpered and bit at fingers that came to close. There were too many hands though, and the nurse with the needle stuck one of the other women, who cried out and pulled her hand back. I still could hear his voice in the hall, along with some others. He was yelling at who ever was keeping him from entering the room. I was tiring out, my body too weak to put up much more of a fight. I attempted at one last idea for my freedom.

“Kylin!” With the last of my strength, I screamed his name. The orderly’s were winning and I didn’t put up much of a fight from then, other then just trying to sit up. There was a commotion outside the room. Who was I to kid; it probably was Ryne. Kylin hated me, why would he be here. My stay in hell had messed with my mind; I was forgetting that he told me he didn’t love me. I was just about to give up for good when he yelled my name, and I knew it was him for sure. I gave chortled scream from the back of my throat, and began my fighting again. I tried undoing the restraints, which were difficult, and I practically dislocated my shoulder and elbow trying, but the man holding me down pushed me back. The door burst open from when a nurse had closed it to keep any unwanted occupants out. He came bursting in with Ryne and Liilia behind him. She looked ready to kill if anyone stood in their way again, her dark skin flushed and her face slightly red. She stormed over to the tray with the needles and where a tube from a bag of blood led into my arm, looking over the contents, snapping at one of women when she told her to get away from it. Kylin came to me, Ryne and him making quick work of the straps. The second my hands were free, I was on my knees and burying my face in Kylin’s shirt. I felt his arms wrap around me, and a hand on the back of my head. He didn’t say anything, a least I didn’t hear anything. I was shaking, uncontrollably, and sobbing. I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt the wetness on his shirt.

“Sorry, I’m sorry, so sorry.” It sounded pitiful even to my ears, but I really was. I was a stubborn, idiotic fool who didn’t know when to shut-up or listen to those around her. He pulled me back, and took my head in his hands, and a memory of when he last did that flashed in my head. I closed my eyes expecting to be thrown to the bed, I mean, what made me react this way? Had I not just told myself that he would not want to see me or even touch me? Liilia was spouting some nonsense at the nurses and orderlies, stating that they were damn fools, and no wonder I had been sick for so long. She ranted on to them about giving me the wrong blood type, that I was blood type A, and they had been supplying me with AB. I toned her and her babble out, waiting for the bed to make contact with my face. I stopped sobbing, sobering myself for rejection. His hands never left my head, and his thumbs gently wiped the tears from under my eyes as they formed.

“Sol, please, open your eyes.” His voice was pleading and sincere. I turned my head to the side, not wanting to open my eyes, ready for rejection in the worst of ways. There was yelling and arguing going on around us, but it was toned out.

“Sol, please, I have not seen your eyes in nearly two years. I can not get the malicious look you last gave me out of my head.” One of his hands slid down to cup my neck. A nauseous feeling rolled in my stomach, threatening to come up, and I started to feel fuzzy. Not the fuzzy feeling you get when something feels good, no this felt like my insides were falling asleep. He pleaded with me, and I gave in, slowly opening my eyes. I kept my gaze averted to the bed, and he pushed my face to the side, so that I was facing him. The feelings grew, and my vision swayed, spinning erratically out of control. My breathing quickened.

“Sol?! Soleil?” He had both hands on my head again, and I was griping at his hands. Through the blurry image I saw him turn to Liilia, asking her what was wrong. Everything faded, and I felt my body go limp. My hearing cut out just as someone said ‘She’s going into a fi…’. My senses came back to me in what seemed like seconds later, and everything was quiet. I prayed I wasn’t in that dark place again, but my sight came back. Everything was still spinning, and I couldn’t move or make a sound. Blinking, I knew my eyes had rolled back in my head, but they came back down, and I was able to see once more. I was on my side, and to my horror I had drooled. Someone was holding my head, another had their arms wrapped around my torso and arms, and yet another weight was lying over my legs. My breathing slowed, and though I couldn’t see straight, I knew I still had my sight, that I was not in that hell again. Someone called my name, a woman, and flashed a small light into my eyes. Her form became more stable and slowed down from moving. She asked me questions, but I didn’t answer, I couldn’t. The weight lifted from my body, first from my torso, then legs and lastly my head. The woman helped me to sit up, and steadied me when I wavered. My head still swam with the fishes, and the nauseous feeling had yet to pass. The woman tried to touch me as little as possible; she was wearing pristine white gloves and was wearing a white lab coat. She turned to a group of people in the back of the room, and it dawned on me that Kylin, Ryne and Liilia had been pushed to the back of the room. She told them that I had been having these fits frequently, but I had never been awake for one before, nor had I woken up after one. She said it was crucial information that they continued on observing me even after the fever was broken. She turned back to me and flashed the light in my eyes again. I whined; the feeling came up again, taking over my entire body once more. This time I felt my eyes roll back, and felt the woman grab for me as a dropped. What was worst then the first time this happened, I was awake for this one. I felt the shaking and tremors. My teeth ground together, and my mouth was forced open, something plasticy was placed between my teeth that I bit down on. I shook, then my limbs stretched out, and then I shook some more. I not sure if I closed my eyes, or if I had them open. My breathing became labored, and then it stopped altogether. I opened my mouth to gasp, but my throat wouldn’t allow any air. Hands grabbed at me, and turned me on my side. Someone held my head off the bed in their hands, and lightly smacked my cheeks when they recognized the fact that I wasn’t breathing. My head spilt in the four direction of the world, and my stomach revolted. They were talking to me, the people who held me down. The one tapping my cheek was telling me to breath, another was asking me questions, or I think they were asking me the questions. The attack ended, and I was able to breathe again, my air deprived lungs burning and hissing. My mind disappeared during the attack, leaving me empty minded without thought process. It slowly came back bringing with it the command for my eyes to roll back down and to smell and hear and see once more. I was tired, and wanted to sleep, but they pulled the thing from my mouth, and were asking me questions again, only this time I knew they were asking me. The woman was shining the light in my eyes once more, and someone was taking my pulse.

“Soleil, stay awake. Soleil? Can you hear me?” I just wanted sleep.

“Don’t let her sleep, go get…” I didn’t hear the rest, nodding off. I jolted up when I felt the needle, but my eyes refused to stay open long. The conversation I heard was muffled, but clear enough to make out.

“She may fall into another fit if she sleeps.”

“…needs medication…”

“…stopped breathing…” Someone pulled me to sit up, my head lolled to the side, and my eyes opened to slits.

“Can you…wake…” Familiar hands were placed on my neck and head, and I knew instantly who it was. I tried my hardest to open my eyes and look at him but it was difficult.

“Sol, you owe me one. Pay up now, stay awake.” I mumbled something incoherent to even myself.

“Fer’ a girl, you sure do make people worry about you.” I lifted my head a little to look more at him and the crooked smile.

“That’s’ok though, ‘cause it’s all worth it in the end.” I couldn’t help but smile and mutter ‘liar’. He grinned, and made small talk, keeping my attention as much as he could. We were in the middle of discussing whether the taxes on things should rise in comparison to they amount of items being produced; (This was an argument that would never end.) and the nurses sticking me with multiple needles, and putting the I.V back in to my arm when the feeling came back. It rose slowly, and I stopped talking, my eyes wide. I knew it was going to happen; it was getting easier to feel it coming on. Kylin thought I was drifting off, and continuously called my name, the nurses took notice. They told him to sit back, and were flashing the damn light in my eyes once more. It hit hard then it had ever before. I passed out, blacking out in seconds.

I came too on my side again, having to gasp for breath. My vision was rocking and I was close to being sick. I was jittery from having to stay in that black world once more. I was up and across the room just after the orderlies let me go. My sight was too swayed for me to stay on my feet long. I crashed into the wall with my shoulder and slide down to the floor, my eyes following a pattern that wasn’t really there. It was too great this time, and I fell asleep, sliding the rest of the way down the wall, coming to a stop when my cheek landed against the floor.

I was no longer suspended in the black world; rather I was trapped in a world of memories. It was as if my mind was making me reassess everything I had ever said or done. I even relived some of them. Such as when I was eighteen, Joshua, a friend I had met in Kylin’s hometown that year, and I accidentally kissed, and I had told him that it didn’t matter, just not to tell Kylin. Well, little did I know that Kylin had been there. When I got back to my ship, he didn’t say anything, and now looking back on it, I noticed the looks he was passing me. Finally, we started to argue over something stupid, and he brought up the kiss in his defense, and I snapped at him that it was none of his business. All these little quarrels happened over the years, and I guess, after being told for so many years that you are owned just gets to you, I was pushing against all sides of my cage, breaking my way out. This sickness and attacks was probably my body’s way of saying ‘you deserve the worst’. Honestly, I didn’t deserve those who loved me. Kylin probably could have been so much happier with some one other then me.

 

3 Months Later

 

My musing had caught me in a daze. Father had been relieved I was well, but had yet to forgive me. Kylin kept a close eye on me, and frequently made me feel guilty for leaving in such a fashion. Father had claimed piracy on me, but the courts could do nothing at the moment because we did not do anything illegal other then sail under our own rule. Other then that, it was not spoken about, although, with my health, I was forced to hand over my title to Ryne. I was no longer allowed to pilot my own vessel, as I could drop into these seizures at any point. The hospital hadn’t a clue what induced them, most likely stress, the sickness and sleep deprivation. So, currently, I was on Kylin’s ship as we made our circumnavigation, as was Zephyr. Ezra had chosen to sail with father. Sadly, I had found out that the mutt from my father’s ship had died, the poor thing drowned. Pity really, it was such a kind dog.

We continued this for sometime, and my past regression seemed to be forgotten and forgiven. Father began to talk with me, and Kylin dropped the guilt trips, or at least I hoped he had. Walking down one of the halls, I turned a corner, to run smack dab into Kylin. I was knocked into the opposite wall, and glared at him.

“Could you watch where yer’ goin’?” He grinned, a dark meaning behind it. He offered his hand to help me and I gave him mine. Wrong move. He twisted my body around to pin me to the wall, my arm yanked behind me, giving him the advantage. He pressed his body against mine, and it was a shock to my system. The contours of our body mold together perfectly, and I couldn’t take my thoughts off the hard muscles that formed his body.

“I’m not so sure you should be snapping at me, missy.” He whispered huskily. I groaned, he was playing dirty. He kissed my neck, nibbling on the tender skin. I bit my lip to keep the moan in. He was playing really dirty, well two could do that. Even though it hurt my shoulder, I arched into his front, pressing my back into his chest and stomach. He growled, obviously catching on quick that I wasn’t backing down.

“Now tell me, are you going to ever run off to play pirate again?” It was just above a whisper, but filled with yearning. I ground my backend against his hips and he hissed, and I lolled my head back to rest on his shoulder. Treating him to the most innocent smile I could manage I said,

“Well, I don’t know. It was quite addictive, all that freedom. You might have to find something else to get me hooked on.” He growled again, only this time it rolled with lust. He spun me around, pinning me to the wall once more, and crushed his lips to mine. He nibbled my bottom lip until I opened my mouth, and in delved his tongue, exploring my mouth as if it was new territory. We broke apart, panting and heated. We stood barely half an inch from one another, our noses just barely brushing. My hands had left my sides to thread through his hair, and I pressed in close to him. His hands slipped under my shirt and his fingers skittered over the taunt skin of my belly, and running up the length of my spine. I lay my head on his chest, concentrating on my breathing. Our lips met again, but in a slower less demanding rhythm. His hands went to my side, and picked me up, pushing me in to the wall harder, while I wrapped my legs around his waist. I deepened the kiss just before we had to break apart. His nails raked down my ribs and my eyes fluttered closed with a moan. He sucked on my exposed collarbone, his skillful tongue darting out to trace a line along the skin before he blew on it. I hissed. Our eyes locked and we didn’t move for nearly a minute before moving in for another kiss. Again, we both came away panting, and out of breath. I leaned my forehead on his shoulder and he whispered into my ear.

“I want you.” My head was swimming, and I couldn’t form a sentence. My breathing was rapid, and my heart hammered in anticipation. His hands dropped drastically from my ribs to my hips where his thumbs rubbed circles in the muscles that led to the groin. I was blessed with speech.

“Not here.” It came out breathy and in a whisper. He growled, unhooking my legs from his waist, and carefully dropping me to the floor, making sure I had my balance before he let go (which he didn’t let go entirely.). He dragged us to the closest door and threw it open. Each step he took was filled with tension. Grunting, confirming that there was no one in there he pulled me in, locked the door, and slammed me against a wall. It was the kitchen. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Kye, you haven’t taken me in your bed in nearly three years, and you choose the kitchen.” He kissed me, obviously trying to shut me up. It was slow and deliberate, and stole my breath away. Suddenly it was too hot. We yanked at each other’s clothes, trying to get them off as fast as we could. Skin was pressed against skin, and we couldn’t keep our hands to ourselves. He trailed kisses down the length of my jaw and throat after nipping my earlobe, making his way down my collarbone and lavishing attention on my breast with his mouth and fingers. I couldn’t help the gasps and groans that followed suit, it was inevitable. I ran my fingers over his chest, liking how the muscle rippled under the skin there. What hair was there was pale blonde and fine like a newborn’s. There was little foreplay, and soon, after some slight begging, he pushed his way into me. Ok, so that was tighter then I was expecting.

“What?” He stared as I shook my head, willing the prickly feeling at the back of my eyes to go away. I took a deep breath.

“I feel like a virgin again, that sucks.” He grinned, about to retort but I snapped at him first.

“Don’t say it, just move.” He doubled checked with me, and continued with short, shallow thrusts until I was comfortable. He grinned once more, slowing his thrusts down slightly to toy with me.

“All…I was…going…to, unh…say was that unh…i…damn…n’ermind…” He grunted out. From there it was just a wild frenzy of need and want. If anyone were outside this door, they would have heard us for sure. I ran my nails down his back and over his scalp, brushing back the strands that fell in his eyes.  He treated me to another breath stopping kiss in return.

So lost was I, that I didn’t hear them until Kylin put his hand over my mouth to cease my vocalization. There were two of them by the sounds of it. They were talking over some trivial and the door handle jiggled.

“Now why would this be locked? Let’s go fine Kye, he has the only key.” The boots and voices turned away and down the hall. I swear, I was laughing my brains out, only kept quiet by his hand. If only they had known, I would never be able to come, no pun intended, in this room again with out remembering this, but that was half the fun, the excitement of being caught. Kylin glowered at me, and made it as quick of work as he could to finish us both off, but I held onto every last shred of the coiling that I felt, riding the feelings out for as long as they would let me. My fingers everywhere at once. On his neck, in his hair, which might I add was getting to be quite long. His fingers trailed up and down my back like butterflies, never in one place for too long, and the touch almost felt like it wasn’t there. It amazed me some times that he could be so strong that he could nearly break my wrist, but be so gentle, as if I was glass. I came before him, muffling my scream in his shoulder, tasting the sweat on his skin as I bit down. He stiffened not too long after, grunting and groaning his completion. There was going to be bruises on my hips, but at the moment I was too content and lazy, but in a good way, to care. We stood there for some minutes when I breathed hotly on his neck.

“We might want to get dressed ya’ know. They could be back any minute…” I trailed off under his gaze. He pulled my face up by the chin and gave me the sweetest kiss ever, but it still left me dazed.

“Ok, whatever I did to deserve that, can I do it again.” He smirked, obviously still riding the high, and clutched me to him, running his hand up through my messy hair. Soon enough he let me go and we set about clothing ourselves. I got underwear shot into my face and a shirt as well.

“Keep your clothes separate from mine, or you might lose them.” He threatened playfully. I smiled coyly at him.

“Well, my love, if my memory serves me right, it should stand to show that the articles of clothing in your pile were taken off by you. So either gather your wits when stripping me, or get over it.” I turned my back to him, thinking I had won. I did the one thing that is dangerous around Kylin. I turned my back to him. I had just pulled my shirt on, and was looking for my breeches when his arm slipped around my middle, and he towed me back against him. Two of his fingers slipped past the band of my underwear, rubbing the skin just below it very softly. He kissed my temple, and whispered into my ear.

“Fer’ a girl, you need to learn your place,” He nuzzled into my neck, inhaling deeply.

“But, that’s’ok, I like it when you bite sometimes.” And then his presence was gone. He had stepped back, continuing to dress himself. I fumed for a few second, wishing he had gone just a bit lower. He had a smug look on his face, so I ignored him. We dressed in silence, and left together. He slung an arm around my waist, attaching us at the hip, and we walked down the hall as though nothing had happened. We smelled of sex though, and there was no way I was going to face his crew smelling like this. Therefore, I convinced Kylin to take a small detour, luring him with a repeat performance. He glared at me, stating he had things to get done, and that my womanly wiles were a distraction. I feigned hurt, telling him if I distracted him so, I would sail with my father. He growled, and I got my shower. We did make it back to what we were doing, later then we had expected, but both of us were in considerably better moods. I for one couldn’t keep the silly grin off my face. I would find myself breaking out in a smile randomly through out the rest of the day. Had Maddy decided to sail with me instead of with Ryne, she would have known instantly why we were in such good moods, not that some of the men were that dense either. I was pretty sure they could catch on quick.

At dinner, the men all sat around chatting excessively, completely unaware of my laughter, and Kylin’s secretive smile. We sat at a long dark wood table with about 13 other men. We were completely absorbed in our talking that I didn’t hear the argument until it was too late. A group at the end of our table were arguing heatedly with one another. I told Kylin I would find out what was wrong, that my wiles should do the trick. He gave a warning glare, telling me to watch my words, though I knew it was all in good humor. I made my way down to the end of the table and caught bits and pieces of what was wrong. My eyebrow raised up in a question as the other men noticed me standing there. They hushed, but two men continued on, ranting on about their opinions, which had to do in part with my love life, and how I was a prize worth chasing. They each had their own opinion, and some rather delicate comments popped in about Kylin and I. They were standing now, quite unaware of me. I crossed my arms over my chest and waited for them to stop. I didn’t see it coming, not until the man in front of me ducked, and I got a face full of the bread pudding. I stood there for a minute before holding out my hand. One of the men swore, most likely the one that had thrown the dessert. A napkin was placed in my out reached hand. I wiped the mess from my face.

“I like the pudding, but that is a bit extreme, don’t you think?” I gave the man who threw it a pointed glare, and he looked like he was having a hard time choosing between crying and laughing. I looked to Kylin. He had his mouth hidden behind his hands, which were folded together. His elbows were on the table, giving him a hunched look. His frame shook slightly, and it took me a moment to realize he was laughing. My jaw dropped open, disbelief in my eyes. He met my eyes, and laughed all the more. My jaw clicked shut.

“Soleil, my love, I know I told you that you looked good enough to eat, but this is going to extremes.” There were some snorts, and hoots, but I didn’t break eye contact. A plan settled into place in my mind. I trailed my hand across the shoulder of the man in front of me as I walked past him.

“It’s sweet of you guys to be concerned, but let me tell you,” I paused to turn and speak behind my hand as if I was telling a secret. “, the sex is great.” I heard Kylin growl as I got closer to him. Some men gave hoots and shouts again, and I could help but smile. I stood before Kylin now, bending at the waist to look him in the eye. I gingerly picked up the cherry tart from the table, holding it in one hand. He glared at me, warning me.

“Don’t you dare.” He hissed. Since when have I ever done what I was told? I slammed it on his forehead rubbing the cherries in his hair and on his face. He sat there and waited until I finished. I licked the sweet pastry from my fingers.

“Oh darn, you’ve gone and popped my cherry twice.” I snapped my fingers while shaking my head in a disappointed way. I batted my eyes at him, coyly saying,

“Didn’t you yourself say just today that you liked it when I bite?” I couldn’t help but let the smile grow on my face, unable to keep it away. I laughed, my hand going up to cover my mouth. I laughed so hard I got a stitch. I went to him with a napkin.

“Don’t sulk Kylin, it’s a bad look for you.” I should have known, but I got within his reach, and I was yanked into his lap. The rest of the crew men didn’t know what to make of us, unsure if it was a good thing for them that I had just rubbed cherry tart all over the captain. They were still chuckling, but not as wholeheartedly. I couldn’t help the smile that spilt my face, and the laughter that rose from my chest. He had a blank face, and I was starting to rethink myself my actions. The tension was thick in the air, but I couldn’t stop the laughter. Deeming myself already dead, I took it a step further and stuck the napkin to his face, the tart paste made it stick there. If I wasn’t dead yet, I was dying then. He pulled the napkin from his face, taking with it a good deal of the pastry and glared at me. The smile on his face was unmistakable. With my back to his side, I didn’t see the food until it was on me. My jaw dropped once more as the heavy custard slide from the top of my head down my face. Kylin leaned up and licked some off as it got to my cheek. I pulled the dish from the top of my head. It was war now.

Before we knew what was happening, the entire dining room broke out in a food fight. Food was flying everywhere and I was nearly nailed twice. Kylin had caught the first one, and pulled me out of the direct line of the second one. Before long I found I couldn’t catch my breath, Kylin took my wrist (after wiping up some of the sweet dessert off his face with another napkin) and slipped us out of the room. The fast-paced walk made it even more difficult to breathe and he stopped half way to our room to look at me. He bent over to stare me in the face, and he told me to take deep breaths. I was feeling lightheaded, and my vision was blurry. He then picked me up, hurrying down the halls to some where. He was speaking to me, but I couldn’t hear him, having gone deaf to all but my harsh breathing. I prayed I wouldn’t have an attack here, not now, not ever again. I was pretty sure I wouldn’t, the nauseous feeling wasn’t there, but my breathing could off set one. I realized where we were when a cold wind slapped me in the face. My short inhale was bitterly cold to my lungs but the spasm-ing stopped almost immediately. Coughing a few times, I took multiple deep breaths, blowing out fog. Kylin had sat us both on the ground, and held my head in one of his hands, pulling it so that my temple was touching his cheek. He kissed me lightly there (on the temple) and whispered something to the winds. I was tired now, it seemed to me as though I was always exhausted before the day even ended. I leaned against him, soaking in his warmth and taking comfort in his presence. How had I live without him by my side? It missed him even when he was just in the other room, or at the other side of the ship. I must have been mad, what in the world made me react that way? After talking it over some with Maddy and Liilia, they think it was due to being over stressed and over exhausted and having too many duties on my shoulders. Liilia thinks the seizures should become fewer and fewer. I think it is that something is screwed up in my head. After being out of the hospital, they gave Kylin instructions if I should have an attack. Not to restrict my body movements, make sure I didn’t hit my head, keep me on my side, and make sure I was breathing. I took medication daily to make sure that I would fall into them randomly, only if I was highly stressed or in such circumstances. I was to take these daily when I woke up, when I went to sleep, and if I had an attack to take it immediately when I woke. My breathing slowed to a normal pace and my pulse dropped, and I was officially freezing. Kylin seemed to sense this, and helped me up and to our room. I flopped down on the bed, ready to be rid of this annoying sickness. I heard the shuffle of clothing and turned my head slightly to the side, facing the drawers. My vision was obscured somewhat by the pillow covering one eye, but I saw well enough what was going on. I had turned just in time to see Kylin pull his shirt over his head, and rub it over his face, then throw it toward the hamper, missing by an inch or so. He had taken his boots and socks off, and now walked about in just his pants, which might I add hung very low on his hips. He seemed to move about the room, but I couldn’t care enough to wonder what exactly he was doing. After some silence, the shower began, and I knew, obviously, that he was showering, probably getting the cherry out of his hair, another thing that was obvious. Shoot, I was just a box of revelations today! Turning back into the pillow I was met with a sweet smelling, sticky substance. My eyebrow raised at it, trying to verify what exactly it was. Two things rang out in my mind.

‘It’s either the pudding, although I thought I had gotten that all off, or….’ I let my thought end there. Reaching my head up, I felt into my hair.

“S**t!” Quickly sitting up, I pulled my hand back. It held traces of the pudding, which was now on a good portion of the pillow. Ugh, this day, night, whatever, was not getting any better. The contemplation of showering was tempting only because I needed to get this stuff out of my hair and because Kylin was in there, but the simple thought of showering didn’t want to sit right. I was on edge and needed something to calm me. The idea clicked into my mind before I had time to actually think about it. I was up and leaving the room, peeking through the open bathroom door to see Kylin with both hand on either side of the shower knobs, with his head bent under the spray. The well defined muscles of his abdomen were curled and tense with the way he had himself positioned, and the muscles in his shoulders strained downward. His blonde hair lay flat to his head, plastered down by the pelting water, and the small rivulets streamed down his body. His eyes were closed to the world and his chest rising and falling slowly. Seemed like I wasn’t the only one tense.

 

Just before I left the room, I hastily threw my bathing suit on, with one of Kylin’s shirts over it.

Moving swiftly through the dark halls, I made my way to the lower deck, and made for the edge. There was one or two guards up and the man at the wheel, I had yet to learn all of their names, Kylin preferred to have many men on hand, where as I had only a few extra. They didn’t even question me as I slipped onto the rope web on the starboard side of the hull. I tugged my shirt off, folding it and placing it with my towel and dropped from the lower deck into the water, pointing myself out like a stick. I slipped into the water, barely making a splash. A man came over to where I had jumped from, and I waved to him, signaling that I was fine. He resumed his watch, but kept post there. I swam for some time, clearing my thoughts and musings. I kept close to the ship as it moved foreword, kept an eye on tides and an eye out for any odd currents, and for any beast that might like to make a snack out of me.  

My tiredness kicked in full force about an hour later, and the chill of the water ran my blood cold and began to set into my bones.

I made to head back to the ship when my leg cramped, the one that damned Rakilin had bit when I was 16. It never was the same since, and a ghost pain would harm it every now and again. I massaged it out while idling in the water, treading water as the ship continued to move foreword. It was getting some distance from me when the kink was finally out and my toes stopped curling. I began to head towards it, but at a slower speed due to my exhaustion. The cold was doing a fantastic job of keeping me awake though. Finally admitting to myself, I wasn’t going to catch up, I just treaded water, saving up my energy. I don’t know how long I was out there, but I had begun to shiver violently, and my lips were numb. I kept as low in the water as I could, trying to keep the winds chill off of me. I soon saw a rowboat coming closer, and I knew Kylin knew I was out here, or the man who I had signaled to was brilliant and just saved my a*s.

 

As I pulled myself up and into the rowboat, as I was handed my shirt, which I was quick to put on. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so cold, and I was naturally a few degrees cooler then your average person.  The trip back to the ship was slow and slightly long, but we made it, and the men ushered me up first.

 After shakily pulling myself up into the deck, I wrapped my arms around myself, shivering. Kylin was waiting for me the second I stepped up. I was still soaked, dripping from head to toe, though my shirt had soaked up some of the wetness. My hair had drenched the back of the shirt and sat like ice against my neck. Kylin had me by the upper arm, and was glaring down at me. He closed his eyes and took a shuttering breath to steady himself. His hair was still dripping and had not been brushed, meaning he had probably just threw on whatever was at hand when he had realized I wasn’t in the room.

“What in the name of the king do you think you’re doing?”   

My teeth rattled, but I stuttered out that I was swimming. He rolled his eyes, stating that he was well aware of that.

“It is the middle of winter, you are exhausted, and you’re sick! What in the hell are you doing swimming?” I felt my temper rise at his temper, and the hackles rose on the back of my neck.

“Don’t you dare play that card! I’m quite capable of caring for myself without your help, I’ve been doing it for years! If I wanna’ strip down naked, and frolic through the woods, I will do it, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it! You need to drop the possessive act pronto, it is really starting to wear on my nerves.” I wasn’t done, my anger burning hot.

“And I’ll have you know, I’m not a freaking invalid! I’m not going to break if I do what I’ve always done, my entire life!” I ran out of words to say as I had gotten what was on my mind off of it. He snapped at me as soon as I was done.

“If I need to tell you one more time, I will be as possessive as I want for however long you don’t listen to me, and feel the need to flaunt yourself about! And if you haven’t been paying attention these past few months, you quite possibly will break! And just to point out, that no you haven’t been able to take care of yourself for years, you’ve always come running to me whenever you were hurt or had a problem!” It was just instinct, really it was, I may have been able to stop myself but my hand moved faster then my brain did. My hand struck his face hard, leaving my palm stinging. His face was downcast, anger rolling through his eyes. His grip on my arm tightened significantly, and he pulled me towards the doors for the lower floors. I had been standing in one place for an extended amount time and the pads of my feet were dry, so when I stepped into the puddle my body had formed, I slipped and my feet came out from under me. Kylin kept the hold on my arm, and my knees scraped harshly against the wood. Standing up, I looked down at my pale legs. One knee was dripping blood down the shin, and the other leg had a scrape against the shin, but it wasn’t bleeding too badly. I glowered at him, my anger broiling up again. He had stopped glaring but was still giving me an angered look. I stood fully up, ripping my arm away from him, and giving him the nastiest look I could manage in my state of freezing, and stomped to the lower floors. I limped awkwardly through the halls and fate really hated me at the moment because I got lost. How the hell did I get lost? This was a sister ship to my own, the blue prints were the same, the rooms were just moved around. I ended up sitting down in the hall and picking at my knee, pulling some splinters out of it. It wasn’t really that bad as it had looked, but I guess when your angry things seem to intensify. Still chilled and shivering as my anger faded, I sighed.

“Uh!” The screamed came out sounding louder then I had intended, but what did I care?

“What the hell is wrong with me?!” I smacked myself in the head twice before slamming my head back against the wall repeatedly.

Why can’t I admit that, point blank, Kylin was always going to be right, whether I liked it or not. And when there was a chance that he could be wrong, he kept his mouth shut.  

“What is the problem with me that I can’t keep myself out of doing something stupid?!” I whacked my head on the wall a couple more times.

“Because you seem to think you’re invincible?” Pressing my head to the wall, I rolled my eyes over to meet his, knowing instantly that when my mind verbally answered me back it was normally Kylin. He had a scowl on his handsome feature, his hair still a tangled mess. I gave a short bark of laughter at his attempt at what I thought was humor. He rolled his eyes, coming to sit across from me. The hall was wide enough for two men to walk side by side each other so there was some excess space between us. Kylin wasn’t the burliest of men, he took up as much space as I did, maybe a little more. I continued to bump my head on the wall, but not has hard as before, a headache having placed itself between my eyes and in my temples.

“Stop that. You’re going to hurt yourself.” He sat with his back against the wall and his legs up, arms looped lazily over his stomach. I strained against the idea to slam my head back as hard as I could, not wanting to be told what to do and what not to do. It took all my will power to leaning my head forward until my chin touched my chest. The look in his eyes told me he was wholly expecting me to do just what that idea had suggested.

“See, you can teach an old dog new tricks.” I sneered. He shook his head, settling his eyes closed.

“What are you doing here? Why aren’t you getting changed, you’ll catch your death in this weather.” I laid my head back against the wall, resting my eyes closed and pulling my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms loosely around my legs. My head lolled to the side, my temple pressing to the cool, grainy wood. It gave off the distinct smell of seawater and earth. It was a somewhat spicy scent with the calm of the ocean wrapped in one. I smirked and gave a small chuckle.

“Of all the things, I got lost.” I heard rather then saw his smile. My knee stung, and blood dried and cracked in places. The salt on my skin was slightly suffocating to my body, and I wanted to rub my skin raw ‘til it was gone, this asphyxiating feeling. It like now matter how deep of a breath I took, it was all count towards nothing, because my body didn’t survive on oxygen, it ran on something entirely different, something that was becoming harder and harder to find.

“I’m not going to apologize.” The whisper was out past my lips before I knew what had happened. He gave a quiet chuckle.

“No, I wasn’t expecting you too. You’re too hard headed.” A question burned in my thoughts, searing right through my skull and flesh to the point where I thought Kylin would be able to see into burned into the skin on my forehead. I was making a wrong move here, but I needed the answer. Peering through heavy lashes, I was struck with the sight of a twelve-year-old Kylin, his bangs hanging low in his eyes. When we were that young, we had decided to cut our hair ourselves instead of having someone else help us. He cut it so short in the front for me that father took me to get it professionally cut, and the only thing they could do was give me bangs. Kylin wanted the same thing and begged one of the other men to cut his hair in the same fashion. Jacob and father had noted several times that if Kylin’s hair was a little lighter, we could have passed as twins. Many people in the markets had commented on us, gloating to father that they hadn’t realized his wife had given birth to such siblings. Many had gone to Kylin, telling him that it was his duty to protect his little sister at all costs, I was weaker, and would not be able to defend myself. That had made me upset, and I told him that if he ever did such a thing I would run away. He immediately told me those people hadn’t a clue to what they were saying. That night as we sat under his blanket with a lantern, we made our blood pact. I was nearly physically ill as this thought immersed itself way down deep in the sore of my mind, sticking there like a stick in mud. We both had cut a sizable slice in the palms of our left hands, and pressed them together, collecting the excess drops in a small glass. We then each took a drink of the blood and vowed to be bonded for the rest of eternity.

“Sol, you can’t tell anybody, ya’ hear? This is just us, we only need each other.” Nodding zealously the girl wiped the blood forming a puddle in the center of her hand on her nightdress. The boy wiped his on his shirt. They cleaned the knife, and slipped it back into it’s sheath, and wrapped their hands in white gauze.

“Not nothing can separate us. We are the same person now. And where ever one of us is, the other will know.” The girl whispered, pulling her nightdress over her head to replace it with a new one, stuffing the bloody things in the hamper. The boy did the same, shoving his shirt and pants to the bottom along with the nightdress, slipping into a new set of clothes.

“And if one of us feels pain, the other will to...” The boy took the girl’s hand. Once more the girl nodded.

“And if one needs help, the other will always be there.” She finished his sentence. They agreed on this pact, embracing in a tight hug. They both fell onto the bed, giggling, clasping their left hands together all the tighter. The girl was asleep first, her hair splayed out across half the pillow. The boy was soon to follow; facing the girl, he took the other side of the pillow, his eyes drifting shut.

The next day both children were sent to the resident doctor because of bleeding hands. He was instantly suspicious that both children had the incision on the same hand. The father was told immediately, and the girl had to hand over her dagger. They both received lectures and extra work.

Displays of these memories had been becoming more frequent. It made it difficult to see Kylin as he was now. I had to keep reminding myself he was someone different now. He was not my brother that I had grown up with, vowing to love and die with. We were different people now; we had grown up. Certainly no one would hold us to the pacts and promises we made when we were children. By blood we were two separate people, and that was all that mattered. Memories could be forgotten, you were capable of looking at some one in a new light they would say. I turned my head to face him directly, the image fading into the twenty-seven-year old in its place. His eyes stayed closed, and his breathing was even, I was almost convinced he was asleep. Almost. I had known him too long to know the difference. His right eyebrow twitched every few seconds stating that he was wide awake, and trying to determine if I had fallen asleep.

“Kye, do you ever regret it?” he sighed and slipped his eyes open to stare at me. He was about to question me, asking what I meant, but he saw the answer in my eyes and knew what I was asking. Sighing again, more heavily this time, he stood gradually, moving to slide down the wall next to me. I moved at a quicker pace, shifting over so that I was now in the spot he had been sitting before me moved.

“I want to see your eyes; I want to see the truth.” Again, he sighed, rubbing his hands through his hair, picking at the knots, delaying his answer. It came over time.

“Not really, I knew what I was getting myself into. I knew you unlike anyone else. There was no possible way we could have been any closer unless we were…” He stopped, throwing the word out in the air for me to pick up.

“…siblings.” His icy eyes met mine and tried to pry into my thoughts, tried to find out why I was asking this question, what was I thinking. He went on when he realized my eyes would betray nothing of my turmoil.

“There were, are, times when I feel as though I’m drowning. One of us slips up somewhere, setting the other off, and I don’t know what to do. Honestly, I think you’ve become a lot more stubborn then I thought feasible.” He slid forward, taking my hands in his. Only then did I realize just how cold I was, my skin bordering on freezing. He obviously felt it also, and covered my hands with his, trying his best to warm me up. It didn’t do anything to my insides, they stayed as cold as ice. He pulled my attention back to his face, to his eyes.

“But do I ever regret marrying you? Loving you? Never. I can’t believe how utterly lucky I am. I have two gorgeous children, and hopefully more to come, a ship to call all my own, and a wife who is amazing and in simple terms perfect to me.” Searching his face and his eyes, I looked for some reason, a shred of doubt, anything to tell me he was lying. I found nothing.

“Do…” He stuttered slightly, sounding as if he wasn’t sure he wanted to ask the question. He swallowed loudly and pressed on.

“Do…you regret?” I stared down at my hands as he turned them over. The pale scars on both our palms sent me yanking me hands out of his and backpedaling to the wall. I wrapped my arms around myself shivering violently. The hall seemed to close in around me. I saw dimly that Kylin reached out for me, calling my name. I cut him short, my eyes meeting his in a plead.

“When did you realize it?” He shook his head, not understanding the question, confusion evident on his brow. His arm was out stretched in mid-air. A lump formed in my throat and I was damn near crying.

“When did think of me as a lover and not a…” I couldn’t say that word. “…a friend?” He still shook his head, his eyes telling me he was thinking rapidly, trying to place why I would bring this up.

“Why would you ask th…”

“What age? When? How old were we?!” I was bordering hysterics now, shaking so violently my hands were unsteady, and it was not from the cold. He was sitting up now on his knees, his hands in mid-air, one reaching out to touch me. When it did, I shrugged it off.

“Don’t know, it just happened…”

“When!?” I couldn’t stare him in the face any longer. He slouched back onto his heels.

“Fifteen, I was fifteen.” His hands dropped to his side and my head flashed up, my jaw dropping. The silence ate at us for a moment; the tears had yet to come. I slumped my head into my hands.

“Three years, threes years and you didn’t say a word to me!” He shot to his defense.

“Hell, Sol, what was I going to say? ‘Oh, hey Soleil, by the way, just wanted to let you know I want to screw you until either of us can’t see straight, oh and don’t forget to tie the docking rope tight, the rope has been loose lately. Later.’ Yah, like that would have gone over real good. Besides, I didn’t even know what I was feeling at first, it wasn’t easy for me ya’ know. How do you think I felt when I started feeling things for my best friend?”

It slipped out before I could stop it, and the fact that anyone could be listening to us made it that much more a secret.

“About as bad as your brother telling you he wanted screw you until either of us wouldn’t be able see straight.” My hand slapped over my mouth so fast, the sting was delayed and came only when I held my breath. His gaze dropped, his eyes opening wide, his head turning slightly to the side, the gems of ice still trained on my eyes. A look of disbelief was planted all over his face, his brow bunched up.

“What did you say?” It was harsh, like he hadn’t taken in enough air to say it. I shook my head form side to side, my eyes just as wide, my hand still covering my mouth. He stumbled back, landing hard on the ground, his back hitting the wall. One hand went to steady himself on the floor while the other held his head. It was a miracle that no one had happened upon us yet, and if they had, they were hiding. My hands slipped to press the heel of them on my eyes, the pressure feeling good, the pain a welcomed thing right now.

“Oh s**t Sol.” It was breathy, as if he hadn’t been expecting to say it. Swallowing past the lump, I made to speak.

“Remember what would happen when one of us would get hurt?” He nodded absently.

“The other would get the same mark and pain.” I left out the nodding, as he wasn’t even looking.

“What had Doc said was happening?” His eye slowly rose to meet mine, his head rising out of his hands.

“He said that it was sympathy pains. We felt the pain as our own because we were so close, we were so close, nearly twins…” he trailed off, trying to figure out where I was going with this. I held out my left hand so that he could see the palm and the scar that ran along the length of it. He stared at it as if he didn’t know what it was, the answer suddenly dawning on his face. He reached his left hand out to intertwine them, pressing them flush together.

“It’s all I can remember. In every memory I recall, you’re always there. I can’t bear in mind anything else, not before you came, nothing of me alone. I cannot even remember the nightmare that plagued me on those stormy nights that sent me to you, only that you had made it stop. There is nothing but you.” The tears had finally leaked the damn, sidling down my cheeks. His face turned to that of horror when the realization came upon him. I sobbed some to clear my chest, I need to get it all out, or I would defiantly go mad.

“I feel like I’m a magnet and you are the other, and some days, we go to each other, and other days we force each other apart, doing all we can to get away from one another. I keep seeing you when we were smaller, these mem…memories flashing by. And I see you younger, and my mind hates me, and tells me that you are not my husband, you are my brother first and always shall be.” I sobbed again, totally out of it, my right hand going to swipe across my face to clear it. All sounds and sight besides us washed away.

“We gave blood Kylin, we said vows, vows that were before we wed.” Hysterical was an understatement. My vision was blurred, and breathing hitched and uneven, but still I went on. Taking his right hand, I pressed it to my chest, just over my heart.

“Those pains were not sympathy, they were real. Can you feel it? Can you feel my heart crumbling and breaking?” I lost all form of speech in that last cry. I felt him pull me forward, wrapping his arms around me. I buried my face into his shirt, draping my arms around his neck.

“Oh god Soleil, what have I done? What have I done to you?” His voice was choked and sobbing as well, the tone speaking in a horrified manner. We cried on each other, our bodies rocking back and fourth until I had no energy left in my being, and cried myself into a dark, dreamless sleep.

I woke on my stomach, my lungs heavy and my face sore. My knee stung but I ignored it. Sitting up, I peered about the room. Kylin sat curled up on a lounge chair in the corner, his head resting on his elbow. His eyes met mine.

“Did you sleep?” It was an automatic response from the life we had been living up until now. He shrugged.

“A little, not really.” Rubbing the sleep and crust from my eyes, I looked to the window. It was shrouded in darkness.

“How long have I…”

“A few hours. It’ll be dawn soon.” I slipped from the bed noticing vaguely that his side remained untouched from when it had been made. I realized I was in a pair of pants that fit loosely around my hips and a long sleeved t-shirt that was soft, probably with a high stitch-count. Stretching, I ended up sitting back down having nothing to do. After some minutes, I grew bored and went to the bathroom, deciding to brush my teeth and take my medication. After that, I went and checked on Zephyr, telling Kylin I would be right back.

Upon returning, he stared at me as I moved about the room in the dark, making the bed, putting clothes in the hamper.

“How do you do it? How do you go about as if nothing is wrong?” I smiled a frown, going to sit on the floor opposite the chair he was in, leaning back against the side of the bed.

“I’m just going about my day, nothing is wrong for me.” He looked up, taking a deep breath, obviously shocked by my response.

“Everyday? Why didn’t you say something?” I shrugged, shifting so that I sat with my legs crossed.

“You apparently loved me a great deal, that I should to you too. I mean, we spent the same amount of time with on another, it would be impossible for you to love me that much and I not feel the same. I figured if I tried hard enough, those memories would go away, like blood in water. But…”

“…even if you mix blood and water, traces of the acidity are still there and no matter how much water you put into it, it will always be there.” He finished my thought. We gave one another pointed looks. He turned away first, shaking his head, letting it loll back onto the seat.

“God, no wonder you always rebelled. And these attacks, I’m surprised they didn’t start sooner. You can only hold things in for so long before the body starts subconsciously making signs. How did none of us think of this, of it coming to this?” My breath caught in my throat.

“I’m sorry, I, I, didn’t mean too, it just hap…hap…” I broke out hiccupping, soft tears running down my face. I looked to him to show I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. He slide out of the chair, and held me, petting my hair.

“It’s not your fault, don’t blame yourself, I only wish you would have said something.” The tears dried up fast, the well being pretty empty to start with. I clutched his shirt in my hands, idly noticing that it was a different shirt from the night before.

I mumbled into his chest, asking what he wanted to do about all this. He heaved a sighed heavily, rubbing small circles on my back.

“I’ll write to Ian, ask him to get the papers so that we can divorce. That’s all I can think off.” It took a second for my brain to play catch up, but when it did, I pushed off of him, looking at him sharply.

“What about Ezra and Zephyr? What would that do to them?” He shook his head, stating he was unsure.

“We would still be here for both of them, though I think we should get Zephyr off of calling me papa.” His eyes grew stern and hurt, confusion rolling around in the great depths. He turned his head away, the sorrow prominent on his features. I pulled his face forward by the chin, making him face me.

“You are his father; why should that change?” He looked unsure and made to explain.

“Sol, you don’t have to pretend. I’m surprised you can even stand to look at them.” He turned his face away again, closing his eyes in obvious anguish.

“Hey…” I pulled his face to look at me again. “…hey. I could never hate them; they are my babies. And in telling you all this, don’t think this changes that fact that I do still love you. I don’t regret, though I feel as though I’m going insane, that there must have been something I could have done to prevent this from happening. But, I couldn’t take this happiness from you. You were so happy to be married, and have children. I want you to be happy, whether I’m thinking of you as a brother or a husband at the time doesn’t matter.” His chest lurched forward in a hiccup like fashion, and he dropped his head back ward to stare at the ceiling. Silent sobs escaped his lips and throat, and I couldn’t help but feel responsible. Suddenly he jerked to face me, tears still dripping down his chin and a disgusted look was settled darkly on his face.

“Oh Sol, those times, when you pushed me away, you said no, you didn’t want to, was that because…?” A hand went to cover my mouth as I nodded, trying to keep the bile from rising, that disgusted look must be for me, I must make him sick. My eyes closed to the world, I waited for the remark, that I was gruesome, and I needed help. That I was sick in the head, but none came. Instead, his arms enveloped me tightly.

“Oh, Sol. I’m so sorry. I had no idea, oh god, it must have been so bad. To think…, and I…, I think I’m going to be sick.” He was up and bounding into the bathroom before a second thought could pass, the sounds of him empting his stomach was as much as a slap to the face then the physical thing. I stayed where I had been sitting, not wanting to move or think. I was sick with myself, and nearly physically sick as well. It was only through years of puking my guts up, and learning to avoid Kylin when these thoughts came to play was I able to keep what little stomach contents I had down. My heart strings ached, they would not let up, tugging as hard as they could. Why had I said something, things could have continued as they were, nothing would have changed.

‘But that is the problem, nothing would have changed. You would still be thinking that you were having sex with your brother, kissing your brother, and he would never know what ran through your sinister mind. The immorality of those things. You would burn in the nine gates of purification, you would boil up ‘til there was nothing left.’ So I sat there, hating myself with every fiber of my being. Those pirates couldn’t hold a candle to my wickedness.

 

The days passed agonizingly slow. Kylin and I said nothing to anybody, the crew probably just figured we were avoiding each other because of a fight. Two weeks later, we docked, all three ships, and I moved some personal affects to ‘The Lunar Winds’. We later announced at dinner that I would be sailing with Ryne from that point forward. We could see the provocative questions in everyone’s eyes, but they dare not ask them. They saw the space we kept between us, and they saw that we were hesitant to touch. We didn’t speak with one another unless absolutely necessary, and we would not even look to one another. I knew they became highly suspicious when we decided to sit at opposite sides of the table in the tavern, hardly saying a word to anyone, spacing out to say the least. It got to the point that the atmosphere around the ships and dinner became too tense that I chose to spend my day in the markets, and I would eat in my quarters for meals. Zephyr had stayed with Kylin, we had decided that would be best, and at the moment I was wondering if Kylin was remembering his favorite food for dinner, or what his favorite animal was when they passed a swimming one, or when they helped pushed a beached one back into the waters. A thousand things I wanted to write Kylin about sang in my ears. Ryne came to me one day to ask if everything was all right, if I was well. He told me that I looked listless when I worked, and I had not received or sent any letters what so ever in two months. I told him, I was fine, a little tired, but well. He needn’t worry over me. I offered him the best smile I could muster, which was lacking to say the least. He let it pass, telling me that if I needed to talk, his door was open. Soon, two months from the day I had told Kylin my secret had passed, and I received a letter in the post marked with the official seal.

I didn’t open it until two days later. Ryne had sent for Kylin and my father by rider, summoning them as fast as possible. They agreed on a meeting place, and we were settled down to open the envelop. I handed the postmark to father, and he fingered the edges for a few seconds before handing it back.

“Best you open it, was sent to you after all.” My heart thundered in my chest, threatening to beat out. We all waited around while I gathered my courage. After some minutes of us breathing on our tiptoes, I grew aggravated and tore the paper open, giving myself a paper cut as I pulled the single sheet of paper out of the holder.

 

Letter Sent to Soleil Isaiah

Marked by the Jurisdiction of Peter Oro’d

 

            My regrets to say that as high judge, I have decided our final course of action for your rebellion against lawful ruling will be to permanently revoke your right to pilot any vessel that can lead you out of King Victor’s jurisdiction.

This is our final act, and shall be presumed performed effective immediately.

            Ezekiel Iriuns            

High Council Judge

 

All the air left my lungs, and I guess the rest presumed that to be a bad thing, because there was an upstart. Father instantly claiming he would take back his claims of piracy, and that he would hire the best lawyer. Ryne and Maddy (who was randomly present at every meeting we had ever had in the past years) sprouted up that they would take the claims on to themselves. Kylin, who sat to my left gently took the letter from my hands, making sure to keep our ‘no touching’ rule intact. When this meeting had started, we had given each other a shy ‘hi’. A quick understanding passed through our eyes, and desire for this event that had happen to us never to have happened. No one noticed our brief exchange, or at least they didn’t bring it to our attention.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the antics of everybody, and I soon quieted them down, telling them what the letter had said. Father piped up, glade that I was not going to be tried for piracy. Ryne and Maddy were extremely happy. Upon our leaving, she took me aside, and asked me if I would lead their wedding procession as her bridesmaid. The hackles on the back of my neck stood on end, and I nearly fainted on her, but gained my collection quickly. I told her I would be honored, she squealed with laughter, looping her arm in mine, going over details and plans.

A week had passed since the infamous letter arrived, and we were getting Maddy ready for her wedding. She was as hyper as a child, bouncing off the walls. The floral arraignments were what took the most time. Maddy wanted a lot of flowers, and father, thinking of her as his own, was more then ready to make that fantasy a reality, not to mention Maddy’s own father chipping in quite an amount for his daughter. To my knowledge Anglia was still unwed. No doubt too, her attitude was appalling. Before long, the wedding was under way, Maddy’s father and sister showed their faces, and acted civil. Anglia seemed to hone in on the distance between Kylin and I, she not being the only one. Maddy had pulled me aside earlier, telling me straight out that tomorrow I was to spill my guts, in a proverbial manner, and start talking. I didn’t know how much truth I would tell her, but I owed it to her to tell her something.

The ceremony took up the better part of two hours, and ended in clapping and ‘hooray’s’. We were all just talking and partying and all together having a good time. Unlike my wedding, the bride and groom didn’t leave the marriage party and end up sleeping for some odd hours instead of celebrating. I pulled a Terese, demanding to know immediately when she was with child, chances would be that I would be her midwife, along with Liilia, who was supporting a hefty belly herself. She was eager for the due date to come as her and her husband were expecting twins. Kylin and my eyes shot to each other with a look of fear before we looked elsewhere. Liilia had caught the look though, and she took me painfully by the arm. She led me to a secluded side of the ship and leaned in as close as she could get to me.

“Don’t think I don’t notice the looks, and the distance. Now spill, what’s up.” I would have answered her if there wasn’t a call from the pier. We all huddled over to that edge of the ship to see what was going on. King Victor’s troops stood in a lengthy line down the wharf. There was a crowd behind them of on lookers, waiting to see what was about to take place. A man with a tall plumed hat called from a paper a list of twelve names. All twelve men were from my crew, or what was my crew. Finally, they called my name, and I stepped forward, someone behind me grabbed at my arm but I shook them off. I had nothing to fear, they could do me no harm, and if they did, it was nothing worse then what I had done to Kylin and I. Ryne and Maddy stepped down with me, and we went to the man with the tall plume. They told him, they were on that ship too, were they needed? The man checked the list then said ‘no’.

“It best be that you two get back on that ship, and continue with the wedding. This is no concern of yours.” Maddy riled up a bit, but was quelled by Ryne quick enough. I stood to the side as the military men lined my men up facing the ship. Each man in uniform stood out against the afternoon sun. Their uniforms were pristine white with dark blue trimming and gloves. Their buttons might have been the same color but it was hard to tell.

I turned to the plumed man.

“Hey, what are you doi…” He cut me off with a shout.

“Ready!” The military men pulled their guns from the upward position they were in and pointed them. My breath stuck in my chest as I realized what was to happen. The call went out before I had time to think.

“Fire!” The guns went off in a cloud of powder and chaos. There were some screams from all around and yells. I was one of the few that had screamed the loudest. Never in my life had I heard a gun go off, never had I seen the damage a gun could do. All of them were dead, twelve men, few had the unfortunate fate to witness their death as it happened. The reminder of the dark sails of those white ships, the ships of death. It forced a shiver through me. The carnage was horrible. The skin was shredded away from bone, while some bone was splintered into the skin. Two officers stepped up after righting their guns and wretched my hands behind my back. I tore them away from the men, still unable to tear my eyes from the dead. The white dress I was wearing for the wedding was dark with gunpowder residue. I stumbled to the dead, the men. One of them twitched, the one closest to me. I dropped to my knees, cradling his head in my lap. He had been shot in the neck, the bullet seeming to just knick the major vein, and still blood pooled and spilled from the hole in his throat. Father was on the plumed man in an instant, declaring to know what the meaning and grounds for this were. The man on my lap gurgled, his bloodied fingers shaking as they reached up to touch my cheek. I could feel the death eating at him already, the dogs just a breath away. The plumed man ignored my father walking to stand over my shoulder.

“My bad, it seems we have a poor shot. We did not mean for any to suffer.” Out of the corner of my eye I saw him pull a duel pistol out of a holster and fire. The blast left me deaf in the left ear, and as the bullet skimmed past my cheek, taking with it a fine layer of skin, it embedded itself in the forehead of the man in my lap. His body jumped as the metal found home, and blood spattered up onto me. I looked from the general to the dead man on my lap, back and fourth as if it was a dream, it had to be a dream, this was not possible.

“What…what…” I stuttered again and again. What I was trying to say slurred out.

“What have…have you done?” The firing of the pistol drowned out my last word. This time a man in a white uniform dropped to the ground in a lifeless heap. The red dribbled down his forehead, soaking into the white. It reminded me of those damned ships, and a time when I watched a bird be killed by a wild cat in the winter. I watched as the snow rapidly turned from that of innocent white to sinister red. The same happened to the man, he was the bird, the man with the pistol the cat.

A man began to read from a scroll.

“Court Summons for Soleil Isaiah, Captain of the ‘Lunar Winds I’

Marked By King Victor Haile VI

In regards to court summons

It has been brought to the attention of the king that you stand now as an enemy against the united countries, and shall hence fourth be considered under unlawful ruling and a threat to the world.

You are summoned to court on the 14^th of the Spring month to stand Trial under the accusations of Piracy.

If you fail to appear, you will be under pursue and will be caught and executed on site.

King Victor Haile VI

Head of Parliament”

I wasn’t sure of what was happening. I heard someone, Kylin call my name, I heard a lot of people call my name, but I got tunnel vision of the red of the blood on the white. The stuffy, sleepy feeling came over me so fast I blacked out.

 

A week in jail waiting to stand trial was pretty bad, not as bad as being dead, but right up there. These places weren’t made so you could wait out your days in comfort. The food just plain sucked, the bed was literally a wooden plank nailed to two concrete slabs. The floor was uneven and choppy and it leaked water from somewhere. The stench was overwhelming and rancid. It smelled of rotting corpses and sewage. I wasn’t quite sure what the water was completely so I tried my hardest to steer clear of it. I nearly shook myself from my skin I was so cold at night, and I could see why the jail keeper said this was not a place for women. I shared my room with three other men. Now, I know I lived with men all my life, living among them and I knew they weren’t too clean, but these guys just put the entire group to better. I had never met more putrid, disgusting people in my life. I would take sitting in a room full of doilies and Anglia to this. I drank as little as possible so that I wouldn’t have to relieve myself much, and I tried to do it when the others were either asleep or out. They were taken out regularly for the ‘activity room’ which, since I was under high profile, I would not be allowed to go to. Fine by me, I had spent my fair share of time in dark rooms where the worst in me was brought out, I could do it again.

When I was called upon, telling me my court date day arrived I was sure they were just going to put me down like a dog. I had been sick to my stomach the entire week, and had to make it clear on more then one occasion that I was not in fact a w***e, and I did not want to become one. I was led to a room, still in the dress I had worn to Maddy’s wedding, that was all wood with a big metal tub in the center. It was filled with water already, and it didn’t look the cleanest of water at that, but I would take what was given. Not wanting to find I had a limit on my time I stripped quickly and set myself into the water. It was rather cold, freezing really. A door slammed open, nearly having my heart beat stop, and three figures stumbled into the room. I recognized them all. Liilia, Maddy and Lori. They looked to me and I could see the pity in their faces, I wanted to slap it off. They were quick as well, meaning I had guessed right on the time limit. They didn’t speak much, but helped me wash. I asked Maddy how it felt to be married, she smiled shyly and just went about her work. Something told me they weren’t allowed to speak to me. I almost laughed at the waddling Liilia did, she was quite heavy with child, and she did a great impersonation of a duck waddle. I say ‘almost’ because I remember the pain of those stupid waddles, and how dim-witted I most have looked, and that the others probably laughed at me. Something had dawned on me then. The feeling one got when with child, the ache in the back, the tingle in the belly. It made a somewhat perverse kind of sense now at least. It hard like a stone in my gut. I was pregnant with Kylin’s child. What was I going to do? He felt pained enough for me by me, what would this child do to him. ‘He mustn’t know, it is as simple as that.’ I would run away before I subjected him to that kind of cruelty.  

The room closed around me, it was stifling with the amount of people that entered, not that it was a lot, but a lot for such a small room. Lori had gone to the door as Maddy helped me fix the straps on the dress they brought for me. It looked a lot like my wedding gown without the fancy stitch-work and pearls. It was just a plain white dress with wide straps that crossed in the back and went a bit past my knees. No one had said a word to me at all so far, and when Lori opened the door, father swooped in, taking me in his arms. I felt short again. My head lay on his chest; I would have to rise to my tiptoes to be at his face level. He held me at arms length. My bangs, which I had decided on during my flight from servitude, had become incredibly longer and fell into my eyes rather then above them. He became serious.

“Soleil, you need to tell me if you did anything that would seem as though it were breaking a law?” I stepped back to pace around the room, a finger placed against my lips in concentration. There was nothing, I searched through every thought and memory, but the only I could think of was one. I turned to him quickly.

“It wasn’t me. Ezra, he pulled his sword on another kid.” I held out my left arm and I saw Kylin flinch. I kept my fingers curled in on the palm. The object that I wanted brought to attention was the scar running parallel my arm. It was about the length of my forearm and got thicker the farther down the arm you went.

“Who knew he was such a bad marksman? He rose it up and I went for the hilt, the blade’s bottom edge got me, and he lost it at the sight of blood. He let go so quickly, the thing dropped down the rest of my arm, the other kid ran away.” A dangerous thought clicked into place.

“You don’t think he’ll be charged, do you? I don’t want him dragged into this!” Frantic and desperate, I’m sure my eyes were wide and wild. Father shook his head.

“I doubt they will bring him into this, I think the government is just tired of having a woman think she do can as she pleases. They want to place the fear of god into those even thinking of stepping out of line. You do not realize just how high profile your trial is. The people you will see in that courtroom, half of them you will never know.” Liilia and Maddy took up the two resident chairs, me being too high-strung to stay in one place. Kylin and Father were leaning back against a wall, waiting for a court official to take me in. Lori had left, she claimed she had left Elie and Elijah alone in the courtroom and was sure they were quite lost as of now. She wished me luck and said she was in the front row. Family and friends had been given the front two rows so that they could see. See what my question was. All they were going to do was ask me questions, ask other people questions, and then decide what my fate will be. My stomach was riled up with my pacing, and the sickness what came with being pregnant was not of any help. A million things streaked through my thoughts at a lightening fast speed. Images and conversations. They all replayed in my head, trying to pull up something that would get me out of this mess. A hand on my elbow jerkily halted my pacing. My head whipped around to face the person, thinking I missed the clerk coming in. Instead, water met ice and we were frozen, rooted to the steps where we stood. I leaned onto the pads of my feet when the rough, grainy wood started to press too hard into my heels.

“Stop.” He breathed out. I nodded slowly and he let go, stepping back to lean against the wall once more, his arms crossed over his chest. I had to think of something, I skimmed my memory for law books. I had read a few when I was doing my studies, they were in somebody’s personal library and they had lent them to me. Something, I have to be able to use something from that knowledge. Without my realization I had started to pace again, my hair tickling my neck as if flew out behind me. I felt like a rat in a change, I need to find a way out.

“Soleil, would you please stop, you’re making me sick.” The firm but soft voice of Liilia broke through my concentration. I stopped in midstride to look at her, she had a queasy look upon her face. My eyes flashed to Kylin then back to Liilia. I had found my answer. The law was not made for women, it was made for men. Under the fourth section, one law had stood out, very clearly to me when I was younger. Why, if the laws weren’t made for women, then why would it say ‘A women with child would carry out the term of pregnancy and be tried at a later date when the child was able to be separate from the mother.’ It didn’t make sense to me then, but that silly law may have just saved my backend. My pacing had started again, but I stopped dead in my tracks. But to use that defense, I would have to publicly state I was with child, my eyes flashed to Kylin’s, surprised to find him frozen in motion merely a hair width away from me. We could only stare at one another, breathing stopped, hearts stilled, minds blank.

“Sorry.” I murmured so only we could hear. He had most likely gone to stop me from pacing again. He shook his head slowly and it was then I noticed everyone was staring at us. I wrapped my arms around my stomach, standing up straight. I pulled a smile from out of thin air, cocking my head to the side.

“Sorry, I must be on edge.” The jovial tone I used was a disillusion to how I really felt. Turning on my toes I went and sat on the floor next to Maddy. Subconsciously, I started tapping the back of my head on the wall. I stopped instantaneously once I realized what I was doing. That movement brought back the night that I hurt Kylin in the worst way possible. No, I would not use this child as a way to get out, I couldn’t do that to Kylin. I would live out my term in jail, claiming that I was raped or something, I couldn’t risk Kylin’s heart for my well-being. That settled, I set myself to quietly sit until I was summoned. My thoughts decided to run away with me. The dream, those nightmares came back, those pirates, those sails, those ships. Things started to add up in them. If I compared them to what was going on in real life, things seemed to fit. I was kidnapped by something, instantly forgetting who I was, who everyone was to me. I had remembered Kylin, but not as my husband, but I had remembered him, though the intimacy of our fighting had told me we loved one another, but kept pushing away from each other. The magnet effect once more. And leaving, the Kylin in the dream had looked so hurt and tortured, and I had done just that to him. I had hurt him beyond all repair, I had broken his heart and put the idea of sick things into his head. And father, he had felt lost on that ship, but I hadn’t remembered him, or Ryne. Why was that? Violently ripped from my thoughts, I was hauled upward and on to my feet. I snapped back to reality and being heaved out a door, through a corridor, and into a small office room.

“You three wait here.” I turned quickly to see father and Kylin behind me. Father wandered off to look at the papers on the desk and the books on the self; I think a conscious effort to give Kylin and me some privacy. A hand on my elbow turned me to face Kylin. On instinct I pushed on to my toes, flinging my arms around his neck, burying my face in the side of his neck. After the second of instinct passed I was expecting to be pulled away, to be set back down on my feet and told to never touch him again. I got what I didn’t expect, arms around me, holding me close to him. I would not cry, not now, please not now of all times. I could not go out into that room to face my fate head on if I was crying.

“Sol, when this is all over, we need to talk…” He whispered into my ear. “…I miss you.” Those three little words left me dazed; I whispered back the first thing that came to mind.

“Please don’t hate me.” Why I said that, it was beyond me now. I felt his head shake, his hair brushing my face.

“Never.” The court clerk came back and we separated, keeping our left hands intertwined. The short portly man sneered at me. He had beady black eyes with a bushy mustache and eyebrows. His neck was practically not there, and his skin was an awful red color as if he had been out in the sun too long.

“Have you found your fear yet girl? Maybe if you beg it won’t be as bad.” I stared at the door we were to enter.

“I’m not afraid, I just need to know I can breathe.” The man sneered again, and Kylin squeezed my hand. I squeezed back, taking a deep breath. The door opened, and we stepped into the court room ready to face fate. My nightmare had ended in death, that might be the out come, but there is always a chance to change destiny.

“Soleil Isaiah, you are being charged with the act of Piracy, do you have anything to say in your defense?”

My head was light and thoughts clear. The darkness of all that had befallen me was gone.

“It only takes one moment to take so many lives. The lives of my men have been forsaken, and that I shall not forgive. May the gold be kind to you for I shall haunt you even in my death. I say kill us now and you shall never rest but with the thought of me at your throat, and I shall command the waves to perish away these lands you hold so dear, delivering back unto the sea.”

 

The END!!

Author's Note

again, same as before...