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I wrote this as a possible beginning to a book, but really just to get out of this writers block I was sort of stuck in.

            Bianca looked around her living room as tears filled her eyes. This was the first time in almost ten years she had been alone in this space. This space, which at one time was a token of so many hopes and dreams, now stood as a dreadful reminder of her failed past.

            She sat on the sofa, did that to keep from falling down. She was shaking badly and felt weak. She knew it would be hard, but never dreamt that it would hurt this much.

       Just twenty-four hours ago she was Mrs. Bianca Lawson, and now she was Ms. Bianca Castro again, a person she hadn't been in over twelve years, a person she felt she no longer knew.

            All around her were constant reminders of her failed marriage, from the furniture they picked out together during happier times, to the framed 8x10 of their wedding day she found impossible to put away.

            Bianca stared up at that picture through blurred vision, at a happier, more hopeful version of her and a husband who at the time seemed almost too perfect.

       Even then she doubted their marriage. She didn't think she deserved to be with him, he could have any girl he wanted, and for the life of her she couldn't understand why he had chosen her.

            She turned away from that picture as tears streamed down her butter pecan brown face, and struggled to catch her breath.

            She had promised herself that after the divorce was final, she wouldn't spend another moment lamenting on what went wrong, but she found it impossible to stop her mind from going there.

            She wondered if she hadn't had such a  farouche personality, allowed him to continue to prevaricate about his extramarital affairs or became pregnant with his child like his last girlfriend had did, then maybe, just maybe he would have fought harder for their marriage.

            Bianca attempted to shake those thoughts out of her head and fix herself a glass of wine, but the soft clang of her wine glass against the kitchen counter seemed to echo through the halls of the house like funeral bells signifying the end of the world she once knew.

            Maybe, she thought, if she was enceinte, at least she'd have something to look forward to, someone who would keep her company and love her unconditionally. That thought caused her to rub her barren stomach, wonder why her and her husband, now ex-husband, could never conceive. It wasn't like they tried not to have a baby, but they never really tried either.

       James was always busy with work, consumed by money and success. When they first met, Bianca admired his hardworking qualities, but after spending much of the second year of their marriage alone or only communicating through Skype, she grew to detest the money and materialistic things that had made her husband a slave to corporate America.

       Wrapped in suburban bliss, a five bedroom home, European made cars and conflict-free diamonds quickly became the tombs that enclosed their marriage.

       She would have given all that up for a husband with a blue-collar job who came home every night, three kids who complained about chores and a dog everyone wanted, but no one took care of but her.

            She looked down at her wedding ring, a ring she now wore on her right hand. A ring she had longed for since her senior year in college, a ring that once represented eternity, but now represented failure. She didn’t know what to do with it. A friend of hers told her to sale it, but to her it was priceless. Although in many ways it represented malfunction, to Bianca, it still represented all that was good about the last twelve years of her life.

            Suddenly a chill went through her body, bringing with it an air of hopeless and despair. She tried to tell herself that divorce was the right thing, but somewhere inside was a hallow feeling, that maybe it wasn’t.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A perfect life can have many flaws. The story was very good. Sometime we look at a life. And wish for more simple and good things. I like how you told the tale of house and possession. A strong ending to a excellent story.
Coyote

[ZakLeonRamsey]

What can I say, Torey1976? This story is really emotional, not bad writing at all. The words you use to describe Bianca's new status, going from Mrs to Ms, are extraordinary. I had almost shed a tear at one point believe it or not, this writing is really brilliant and I think that your skills of writing are higher than mine. A lot of emotion. I think a blind man would see the emotion in your story, that's how strong the emotion is in the story.

Anyways, I think it is really good, 5/5. Would read again. This is excellent, I've never read something from somebody as fantastic as you, Torey. Like i said, keep going. This is a masterpiece and your next piece of writing might even be better, don't you think? :)