Devil's Chauffeur

The devil is a wicked one to drive for. And he always needs a driver. Are you driving the devil now?

All alone, on a lonely road at midnight's peak
An abandoned soul seeking thrill roams the thin-line streets

Hands off the wheel, head full of pill instilled thoughts
The experience enhanced by the chance of being caught

He's lost, just a drifter driving pedal kissing metal   
The Devil's chauffeur deserving a demented twisted medal

Incredible he hasn't crashed for this long, he feels wrong
Eyes swinging in the dark behind closed lids, he's so gone

To add on, a new set of headlights are approaching
But the Devil in his ear commands him to keep going

"No slowing, speed up, no swerving off this course"
No emotion, no connection between death and remorse

He's cursed; the rush is killing him and keeping him alive 
Still he blindly accelerates to meet his demise 

The guy inside the truck ahead tries not to collide 
And whips the wheel to avoid the driver's suicide

A narrow miss, but he survives, though the truck is trashed
It hits the curb, jackknifes and rolls until it crashes

He dashes towards the wreak, suddenly out the Devil's clutches
His mind shakes free of the pills' inebriating touches

Clarity catches him mid-stride; he realizes what he's done
Seeing the driver dead, and passing passenger so young

"Look at what you've made of me," he sighs in childish innocence
"You've lost everything you gained from me!" And then in shocking vividness

The youth's final movement is to turn and face the culprit
The sight is so agonizing he physically grows sick

He reaches for the boy, his eyes tearing at the scene
A twist of realism only possible in dreams

His insides scream seeing the deceased face of his own
He looked the same as he did just seven years ago

Holding the cold body to his chest close and tight
Weeping for the purity he lost that fateful night

Back before agreeing to the demon's damning offer
Before he sold his life away to be the Devil's chauffeur

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Technically good, but the story is somewhat pastiche and overdone. It reads almost like one of those songs one hears about the dangers of drunk driving. There's nothing wrong with that specifically, it's just very derivative and expected at this point. You're obviously a talented writer, so I'm a little disappointed you chose to stick to such a mundane and boring plot for this piece. A good start, but it could have been much better.

[Tory Steller]

It's a little deeper than just drunk driving, but it makes more sense in context with the story it's going to be attached to. I agree the poem itself could be better, and I may touch up upon it when I begin the story, but for now it suffices. Sorry you're so desensitized to plots like this.

[AWickedMoon]

Wow I quite enjoyed this work as well. You deffiently hade some wonderful lines in there. The only thing was the first line did you mean Road?

[Tory Steller]

Thanks again! I really don't remember. Road seems to fit, although it might have been ride. I'll change it to road though, it flows better.