I can totally match up in the feelin of letting go not only cruz that how u wrote it bit because in life..im dateing an older man and theres a chance i can play that part. Great! Poem!
I wonder how this piece affects other hearts because it has touched mine for a personal reason. Because, I was the girl and he was the boy and I broke his heart. So, yes, this piece stung. It's all good though! I like it that way. When writing meets reality. Well done!
this is certainly a true to life write,i enjoyed reading it!
i like your profile as well,and you are right about touching other people
that`s why i never give a bad review
Words flow freely when they are borne from the heart...this is a dialogue that is so familiar in today's society...that man to whom the picture is still clear and strong and to which he gave all....only to find the partner has grown to want more....but still not realizing she had it all and began to grow inward to a more selfish place.....if only the original love was surrendered to...all would feel the real worth...and it would continue......this wanting more is simply a diversion of a ruining kind! Wonderful writing!
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Thank you, Penlady.
I attempted to express both the change, and the need to pay attention so.. read moreThank you, Penlady.
I attempted to express both the change, and the need to pay attention so that change can be address along the way. Young love often grows apart when "real life" kicks in.
8 Years Ago
Yes, and the REAL life is at times the most exciting....you conveyed exactly what you meant!
Very rare persons can accept that they have changed. People often put the blame on the other person, unaware that their perspectives change as they "grow up".
It is sad to know that the person whom one started making her dreams with has different dreams to reach now. Maybe he realized she is not what he wants after seeing her flaws he didn't see when they were younger.
I understand the point of the speaker here...he had grown up while the other one still remains a "kid". His plans changed because his perspectives are different now. The woman will only be a hindrance to his dreams since she never "grow up".
That "the girl that wanted me to not get up to not go" describes that photo you used. She's a woman who doesn't want her man to get up , uses her charm and sweetness so he won't leave her in their room. To her, love is just pure sweetness, while to him it is now so different.
Lol. That's my take on this poem. Idk if it makes sense. Your poem is effective and so moving for me who can relate to it. The artwork is excellent for mature eyes. You used simple word choice but combined with the style plus artwork, this piece is superb! My rating is 100/100 but won't hit that here because it will only give you 93. Lol.
I always love your work. I am always a fan. Thank you for sharing your creativity with us, A. God bless you richly.
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Since the words came without stopping to think, I can't say a point was in mind. I can only say I av.. read moreSince the words came without stopping to think, I can't say a point was in mind. I can only say I avoided the usual "beautiful morning in love" topic I prefer, to something deeper to offer others because neither side pertains to me currently. And yes, the portrait inspired the last lines ~which wrote themselves before the beginning :-)
Thanks for the awesome review, and for your time and devotion, Dhaye
"I don't want to sound like I've studied writing, I want to sound like I've studied life."
As a writer I tend to be a sponge for real life experiences; drawn to passion, raw & untamed emotion and.. more..