Cast the first

free verse - Warning - deals with suicide

They line up

With their stones

I am buried 

to my chest

in their disdain

I don't fear 

this death.

Together

professionals

friends 

family 

start hurling

their

'accusations'.

As my lights

dim

under the 

barrage

My main thought is

- how

can I be accused 

of 

'trying to end my life'?

'

'

~ to me~

it never 

began.

Reviews

[Ardra]

very deep subject... nicely written.... true how can people blame others when they have no clue of what other has gone through .. i was not sure to read it when it said involves sucide.. normally i don't..when the writing is more about the detailed version of it, this one is a good one which conveys the feelings in a better manner..
i have read few pieces from authors which made we want to run away thousand miles of it...

[Tony Jordan]

It is sad that well meaning people can sometimes make the situation worse.
This was the first time I visited these dark times in poetry. I was very aware of my language and worried that it could deeply affect readers. I'm grateful that you brought that aspect of this one up Ria. Thank you very much my friend !
:))

[mercy party]

you identified a profound hardship, your writing really helps bring it to the light. In the line "i am buried to my chest in their disdain, you created such a visual ( i literally could see someone buried in rocks to their neck) I felt it. Another gem!!

[Tony Jordan]

I worried that I was trivialising an truly awful practice still carried out in some countries but I thought this metaphor would convey the desperate overwhelming feeling of those days.
Thank you M.P.
I appreciate your great reviews.
:)

[Luna]

Simply beautiful Tony :) . I have no words to explain how I felt reading this. Sorry, been busy these days so I wasn't much online had a bad day. Just wanted to let you know that you made someone smile today . Thanks for that (you wrote down what I felt but couldn't explain)

[Tony Jordan]

I'm sorry to hear you had a bad day Luna. (hugs)
Your review really helps me to come to terms with my own darkness - your review gives me confidence to pen these times and know I could be possibly helping a friend in doing so.
Thank you so much.
(another hug) :)

[Luna]

awwww... thank you Tony (for the hugs) cheered me up :) Your welcome BTW ;)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Brutal, but well written in a flowing piece filled with shades of anger and desperation.

[Tony Jordan]

Thank you John. It was a bad time when good intentions seemed like attacks. The mind was very irrational at the time. Proper meds allow me to look back and see what I couldn't then - Love.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Glad to hear you are now able reflect on the experience Tony. Many of us have been down a similar road.

[Dr. Wood ?]

Oh my but this IS a sad one Tony. I cannot personally relate to it but the poem is a clever one and quite expertly constructed

[Tony Jordan]

Thanks Doc - I didn't want to just report or vent (thought there's nothing wrong with either style) so the twist, I thought would stay with the reader longer.
I appreciate your review very much my friend. :)

[Alfred Kukitz]

By the time you read my review I hope and hope rather deeply you find your onion.

Regards,
Al

[Tony Jordan]

Al your words mean so much, thank you.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you have such a point...how could we be ending something that never even began?

great question...
thoughtful poem with your clever surprise ending.

[Tony Jordan]

The automatic pilot of those days - the husk - it felt as if I was doing the best thing. The overriding phrase which struck me back then was 'They shoot horses, don't they'.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts J.