madness

this madness. i feel it inside me each and every day. sometimes it's just a tickle and sometimes it overwhelmes me and absorbes me. somedays it's just in the back of my head, but somedays it leads my actions. makes me do bad things. mad things. i hurt people i love. i destroy what i've built up. and i always say, that wasn't me. it was the madness inside.
but isn't this madness a part of me?
isn't it that one part of me, that defines me?
is it really that bad? is it madness, or is it just myself?